I hope this isn't an indicator of how this week is going to be. It's always best to get R done the first time and move onto something else.
My web browser went a little funny and I couldn't tell if my reply was sent so I sent it again and they both made it. Oh well, one for each smoke free month.
How are you doing Rose, Maz and Smokey?
[B]My Milage:[/B]
[B]My Quit Date: [/B] 3/15/2007
[B]Smoke-Free Days:[/B] 60
[B]Cigarettes Not Smoked:[/B] 1,204
[B]Amount Saved:[/B] $252
[B]Life Gained:[/B]
[B]Days:[/B] 9 [B]Hrs:[/B] 18 [B]Mins:[/B] 22 [B]Seconds:[/B] 24
DJ,
I have been checking zero for awhile now and I have the notion to smoke almost daily. The urgency behind the notion is nothing compared to the first 5 days after stopping. It's an annoyance more than anything now. Even as a notion I respect it and won't let my guard down. This is where I've failed in the past, where I am now. This annoying little "dig" that sucker punches you when you're vulnerable. Cravings as strong as day one that come up on you months after quitting usually on top of something else. A trigger that didn't occur to you because you so rarely come by it now is in your face demanding to be dealt with along with another stressful event you probably have less if any control over. The smoking part is easy to dispense, a pack of smokes and a lighter and that part, the part you have complete control of , is no longer a player and you can devote your energy to that which you likely have little control of. The strength to change what you can, cope with what you can't and the wisdom to know what it is you're dealing with.
I have a plan ready to get me through this when it comes and I fully expect it any day. I have a stock of life savers and mints and I won't allow myself to get arrogant in thinking I've arrived and it's all behind me. I check the zero but that doesn't denote the amount of energy and thought I'm putting into this.
I have a 45 day old quit now and I've had a 382 day quit that I lost to a situation I summarized above. It was a pointless sacrifice and it took me years to get back to the point where I could be successful at quitting again.
You have a 100+ day quit and it's no zero. It certainly wasn't zero effort that got you there and it won't be zero effort in getting another 100+ days. The skills we're building now will help us stay smoke free for the rest of our lives, zero smoking.
[B]My Milage:[/B]
[B]My Quit Date: [/B] 3/15/2007
[B]Smoke-Free Days:[/B] 45
[B]Cigarettes Not Smoked:[/B] 914
[B]Amount Saved:[/B] $189
[B]Life Gained:[/B]
[B]Days:[/B] 7 [B]Hrs:[/B] 9 [B]Mins:[/B] 59 [B]Seconds:[/B] 33
This is an amazing post, so tragic and powerful. How many lives will be saved as a result of the thoughtfulness of this man and the continued support from those who recognize how important and influencial he was. May God bless us all.
[B]My Milage:[/B]
[B]My Quit Date: [/B] 3/15/2007
[B]Smoke-Free Days:[/B] 49
[B]Cigarettes Not Smoked:[/B] 996
[B]Amount Saved:[/B] $205.8
[B]Life Gained:[/B]
[B]Days:[/B] 8 [B]Hrs:[/B] 1 [B]Mins:[/B] 46 [B]Seconds:[/B] 2
Hello Lainey,
I'm watching for the boat to arrive and I'm ready for it. I'm going to drop my bags in my cabin and head for the slot machines. I feel lucky!
[B]My Milage:[/B]
[B]My Quit Date: [/B] 3/15/2007
[B]Smoke-Free Days:[/B] 49
[B]Cigarettes Not Smoked:[/B] 996
[B]Amount Saved:[/B] $205.8
[B]Life Gained:[/B]
[B]Days:[/B] 8 [B]Hrs:[/B] 1 [B]Mins:[/B] 48 [B]Seconds:[/B] 28
Hello Lainey,
I'm on board....SNAP!....ooooooooweeeeeee!
Marching on!
Smokeless!
My quit is as solid as the hull of the boat. No sinking feelings, it's all sunshine and I can hear the waves crashing on the beach not far from where I am now. I'll be there too and more. I was so ready to quit this time that it feels right. This is how it was supposed to be for all those years but I didn't know it because I was somewhere else. Now I'm here and I like it, I want to stay.
I hope everyone feels this way about being in control of the addict. It's no small deal and if you can do it you're on your way.
[B]My Milage:[/B]
[B]My Quit Date: [/B] 3/15/2007
[B]Smoke-Free Days:[/B] 50
[B]Cigarettes Not Smoked:[/B] 1,012
[B]Amount Saved:[/B] $210
[B]Life Gained:[/B]
[B]Days:[/B] 8 [B]Hrs:[/B] 4 [B]Mins:[/B] 50 [B]Seconds:[/B] 13
Thank you Mercy,
That's good stuff. There's a natural consistancy to the idea of it.
[B]My Milage:[/B]
[B]My Quit Date: [/B] 3/15/2007
[B]Smoke-Free Days:[/B] 52
[B]Cigarettes Not Smoked:[/B] 1,046
[B]Amount Saved:[/B] $218.4
[B]Life Gained:[/B]
[B]Days:[/B] 8 [B]Hrs:[/B] 11 [B]Mins:[/B] 32 [B]Seconds:[/B] 49
Good for you Lainey, you are an inspiration!
I was a little worried about you when you described what you would be up against this past weekend. I'm not sure how I would have got through it and it's facinating reading your thoughts of how you navigated your way through it.
I'm not too keen on the idea that we're mourning the loss of an old friend here. That doesn't feel right though I understand what motivates that thought, the addict within. The idea of mourning gives it an almost respectable quality, a reverence of a sort. It's really primal and deceptive, untrustworthy and not deserving of any respect at any level other than respecting the fact it can fool us. It's hungry and we're starving it. It's looking for ways to break down the walls of our quit. Giving it an ounce of respect will take a brick completely out of the wall and give it a foot hold. I say no! Nothing for you addict! I know you're there and I know you're starving but you have to if I'm to live and I AM GOING TO LIVE!
[B]My Milage:[/B]
[B]My Quit Date: [/B] 3/15/2007
[B]Smoke-Free Days:[/B] 54
[B]Cigarettes Not Smoked:[/B] 1,085
[B]Amount Saved:[/B] $226.8
[B]Life Gained:[/B]
[B]Days:[/B] 8 [B]Hrs:[/B] 19 [B]Mins:[/B] 11 [B]Seconds:[/B] 50
Lainey,
I think I understand the idea of loss and agree with your point on respecting the power of something that can hurt us. I would never miss a tornado though I understand it was once something in common with others, maybe even enjoyed.
My relationship with the addict is more adversarial in nature. I respect its power and am still learning the extent of that power. I give it nothing and mourn nothing about it. My feelings are absolutely ice cold here. I'm done with it forever. All I have to do is learn how to keep it down and away from control. My addict is the enemy and it has no redeeming qualities. It resides in the "id" and is a part of who I am.
Thank you for your thoughts. I've learned so much from you and others here at the SSC. I'm in your debt.
[B]My Milage:[/B]
[B]My Quit Date: [/B] 3/15/2007
[B]Smoke-Free Days:[/B] 55
[B]Cigarettes Not Smoked:[/B] 1,105
[B]Amount Saved:[/B] $231
[B]Life Gained:[/B]
[B]Days:[/B] 8 [B]Hrs:[/B] 23 [B]Mins:[/B] 7 [B]Seconds:[/B] 19
Hello Lainey,
Thank you for the encouragement, a forever quit is what I'm going for and I could use all the help I can get. I'm a new resident of the State of Wisconsin and originally from New York. And I believe I read you reside among our freinds in the North and I'm happy to know you.
Tom
[B]My Milage:[/B]
[B]My Quit Date: [/B] 3/15/2007
[B]Smoke-Free Days:[/B] 56
[B]Cigarettes Not Smoked:[/B] 1,125
[B]Amount Saved:[/B] $235.2
[B]Life Gained:[/B]
[B]Days:[/B] 9 [B]Hrs:[/B] 2 [B]Mins:[/B] 55 [B]Seconds:[/B] 10
Thank you Lainey,
60 days feels good. Hello Rose...good to hear from you and congratulations! March on.
Tom
[B]My Milage:[/B]
[B]My Quit Date: [/B] 3/15/2007
[B]Smoke-Free Days:[/B] 61
[B]Cigarettes Not Smoked:[/B] 1,224
[B]Amount Saved:[/B] $256.2
[B]Life Gained:[/B]
[B]Days:[/B] 9 [B]Hrs:[/B] 22 [B]Mins:[/B] 11 [B]Seconds:[/B] 22
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