Why do we relapse?

I totally agree with you claire. A relapse is just another tiny bump in the road, a challenge. But We are still in control of what happens to us. We control the anxiety. NOT the other way around. You are so right!!!! Thanks that turned out to be a good pep talk for me before my exam lol -Diva

scared to death!

Wow congratulations Krystin on controlling your anxious thought yesterday. that is a great sucess! You go girl! -Diva

I don't know if this is in the appropriate section but,,,,

Thank you very much Sue :) I have been talking a bit more about this with my husband and he assures me he is fine and he understand why i dont have a smuch time and energy for him and that he can wait. HE has been very understanding. For now i spend time with him when i can and when it makes me feel anxious i do my own thing. I try not to beat myself up so much about it anymore but it is dufficult because i miss him and i feel defective somehow. But i try to fight the bad thoughts and tell myself i have a right to the space and cocoon i need to get over this and back to myself. Anyway, i do understand what you are trying to say and i will try to be easier on myself and understand i cant always worry about him but i need to take care of myself. Thanks a lot Sue for answering my post. It means a lot to me! Thanks everybody for your continuous support and for answering this post. It has made this situation much easier. :) -Diva

Exams soon please help!

I did it! My monday exam is now done! Now i just have to get to the friday exam lol. Anyway, just wanted to let you know i lived. Gonna post longer in the success part of the forums. Thanks for all the tips they really helped! -Diva

Some ideas that may help.

Thanks for the great tips it is much appreciated :) The visualisation one sounds very nice :) -Diva

Exams stories- Write them here!

Ok guys, this might be a long post or it might not, i am not sure. I am still in the rev down part of my day lol was a long one. First, this morning i woke up early to do some last minute reading over of my notes. I managed to stay clam through it and get ready for school and eat breakfast. Then i headed to my exam. When i got there i kept thinking: Oh! if this exam could just start it could be over with! But that was making me anxious so i decided to take that time to write in my diary (and fill out an anxious thought form lol). That helped me a lot. I wrote lots of positive stuff to myself in my diary. Like all the logical and good reasons i could get through my exam without a hitch and pass it too (but that passing my exam was not necessary for me to be a worthy peron.) So anyway did lots of self talk in my diary then got to my exam. I started by looking at the back of the exams to see what the long questions were and saw that i knew how to answer them. Since they are worth a lot that was a major releif. Then i looked over the whole exam to see its length and i figured i had plenty of time to do this. Then i buckled down and did the exam. Ended up taking every last second of exam time but i did it. And i think i did well too. So no panic attacks! I made sure to breathe well and focus on the exam and understanding the questions and it went just fine. Just like i had visualized. And since the exam time was shorter then a normal class it gave me time to eat and research a hoby of mine on the net till my next class. Because oh yes! my day was not over. After my exam i also had another class! I felt exhausted and nervous that i could not go home after the exam. But i ate and distracted myself and told myself that researching my hobby was a great reward and that made me feel better (thanks Isabella for the reward thing, it came in handy today :) Then i went to my second class and i managed to focus well and participate.Then i learned that the person i was doing the final project with had quit the class. So i am doing a two person project alone. But instead of panicking i went and talked to the teachers about the possibilies i had and i ended up changing subjects for something more fun and easier so i think as a whole it wont be so bad. I can do it, i have d

Hmm transition anxiety?

Ok i don't know if anybody else has this. I put is as transition anxiety cause it kinda is . But i guess it kinda is not. I am not to sure what to call this lol. When i have a hard day it is like i gear up. I get ready emotionally and mentally to face the challeneges ahead. A bit like a knight who puts on his armor and becomes very vigilant and ready to fight the dragon if he shows himself. (Sorry for the knights of the round tables metaphor but it is the best i have lol). Anyway, so i buck myself up with courage and get ready to face my day. And i do face my day. But then when i get home, it is like i have trouble doing the transition between ready for a hard day and just plain calm enjoying myself at thome. It is like i am a revved up car but i don't know how to rev down!!! And that my firends makes me terribly anxious. So even after a success i am always afraid that in the winding down process something will go wrong! Like i will have a bakclash panic attack, or more like and after effect panic attack as i am trying to transition from my day to my relaxation time. I don't know if this makes any sense or if anybody else has this! But after a big day like today, it makes it really hard for me to just wind down and relax. And the fact i have trouble winding down makes me anxious which makes it hard to wind down... you see where the problem is. So i am here writting to you, hoping i am not too crazy lol and that somebody might have a tip for me. Anyway, any type of answer would be appreciated! -Diva

Bad Night

Hi Samanthat. It sounds like you had a tough day. I totally sympathise with you. I have had days like that before. Don't give up, trust me you can fight this and win! I truely beive that you can do this. As for not recognizing people and feeling like you are in a dream and such, it is ok. It will not land you in a mental ward. Panic and anxiety sufferers often suffer symptoms called depersonnalization and derealisation. And the experience you described sounds pretty much like that. I bet you a ton of people on this site could write you posts describing similar experiences. I haven't had a moment like that in a along long time but i had them way back when. Trust me, you will learn to recognize this a nother of your anxiety and panic symptoms and that will help you cope with it and make it less scary. You will be ok. Just work the program and keep challenging those thoughts and you will be ok. Remember, you have it in you to control this ans heal yourself. Just hang in there it will get better! In the meantime, just be good to yourself and take good care of yourself and remember there is always hope :) This too shall pass! When you get to the end of your rope just put a big knot in the end of it and hang on! Anyway, i am sorry i do not have many more words of wisdom for you atm. I am a bit tired and so i am not quite as bright lol. But i did mean it when i said i beleive this program can help you and that you can beat this! Take care and keep me posted! -Diva

Drawing and coloring

Ok this might sound a bit infantile but i have discovered that drawing or coloring really helps me relax. Drawing is more effort and i don't always feel like it. But when i feel creative it is really nice :) As for coloring , well that is all around Kiddie fun and wonder! I have lots of fun with my big crayola markers and my coloring books. It seems that just the fact of playing with bright colors does something to my brain. As i watch the white dissapear from the coloring page i just feel lighter and better i cannot explain it! It might not work for everyone and might even get me ridiculed to post this but i thought i would share it with you all in case it might help you relax too lol Anyway, have fun trying it! -Diva

Exams stories- Write them here!

Thank you Casey^^ thanks for the encouragement and the support :) It is greatly appreciated. -Diva