Good to hear from you. It sure seems that things are progressing in a positive direction for you. It also seems that telling your husband has been a plus as well.
Continue on your positive path, you are doing great!
I have been reading some of the post from the past few days trying to catch up on everyone. Congrats to those that are staying with your plan and support is always here for those that are finding their journey difficult.
I am an enjoying an AF night and looking forward to the morning with a clear head. If I could take this feeling right now and the feeling I will have in the morning and remember it, I would never drink again. But as we are all aware, when it comes to alcohol, even the memories we make with clear heads are clouded with the mere thought of alcohol.
Well, after a short "technology vacation" I am back. I am currently day 4 of being AF. I did 4 days a few weeks ago but had told myself that I could have drinks on Friday, which I did. I have had a few nights here and there of being AF but going for many days is new to me. Until a few weeks ago I could count on one hand the number of times I had been AF in about 13 years.
Something this time seems different. I am in e US and tomorrow is a big holiday for us and even though I know that I could drink, I don't think that I will. I think I have realized that my body needs to rid the alcohol before I go back to it. Only time will tell but I am feeling pretty positive about it right now.
Hello TS and Patticakes. I have been away for a bit but have read a few of your post. I feel the same way as you TS, moderation does not work for me either. For me it is easier to go without than having one or two drinks. However, my goal is not abstinence (not at this time anyway). I have drank everyday for about 13 years so to go for a few days AF has been a step for me.
Currently I have not have a drink since Sunday. I do not plan to drink tonight. If this happens it will be the longest I have ever gone in over 20 years without alcohol. Until a few months ago I thought I was in control of alcohol because I would usually stop at a certain number of drinks but have recently realized that I could rationalize having "just one more." I was/am anything but in control. Waiting for the clock to tell me when it was OK to have a drink, if I went somewhere wondering if I would able to drink, alcohol controls me. Tired of it.
Was the site down all weekend or was it just a problem on my end? Either way, glad to be back!
Junes, awesome job of being one month AF! I remember when you first came in and you were very down on yourself. I am glad that you are working things out and heading in the right direction. Keep up the good work, we are all here for you and cheering!
Dave, in one of your post before I was unable to access the site you asked if it was my mind or body that was tired of drinking. My first reaction was my mind. Tired of thinking about drinking, the time of day (when I could have my first drink), what number I was on, etc. but the more I thought about it I realize that my body is tired to. As of right mow I do not show any physical signs of drinking but know they will begin to show eventually. And that leads to your question TS, was I having any withdrawal. Last week I went 5 days AF and really didn't have any withdrawal despite the fact that my daily intake is 6-7 beers/vodka or rum drinks. I know this daily intake has to stop and actually enjoyed my time not drinking, just hope I can keep it up!
Zoey, haven't heard from you in awhile. How are you?
Junes, awesome poem on the other post. I am sure I will refer back to it often.
Last week I went 5 days AF, the longest I have gone in over 13 years. One of the days was the 4th of July!! I allowed myself to have drinks over the weekend and then on Monday had 2 beers and was heading for my 3rd and actually caught myself thinking, "I really don't want want beer." I don't know if I have EVER thought that before and if I did I certainly didn't listen to it! Today I finished my work early and was bored and of course my thoughts went to drinking. I fought them off and and glad I did. Look forward to tomorrow morning and not feeling bad!
Dave, I have to say thank you (once again) for your suggestion of Paul Mckinna. Having the confidence of getting a good nights sleep has often helped me get through the thoughts of not drinking.
Good morning June and welcome. Your story sounds much like mine. Loving the drink that we drink and thinking that because everything else is controlled and in order (diet, exercise, family, job, etc) it gives us permission to drink. If you are like me, you go through the day doing/not doing certain things to allow those drinks at night. I too have tired of being " sick and tired", walking around knowing I am living a lie. Tired of waiting that magic time to allow myself to have a drink. Odd isn't it, we wait all day to do the one think in our life that we KNOW will make us unhappy.
Until a few weeks ago I only had a few days of not drinking in 13 years. Since coming to this site I had 3 occasions of being AF 4+ days, and they all began with that first day. Today is a big day for you and as Dave said, find something to do, anything, just don't drink. Don't look to tomorrow, it will come soon enough. Focus on what you can do tonight other than drink and think about how different you will feel in the morning.
I personally don't see what you accomplished as a cop out. I had the same type of night. I allowed myself to enjoy the drink I like with friends. The difference was maintaining control and like you did not continue the destruction once I got home.
I think you an awesome job so early in your journey. Keep and up!
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