EvolutionHealth.care

Home
Members List
Member View
Posts created by Shari

Advanced Search Form

Members List
Moderation Team
Member View
Posts created by Shari

13 years ago 0 +0 / -0 1071

Negative Core Beliefs - Part II

I just had a break through from reading everyone's post on this thread. The reason I know it's a break through is, because I can't stop crying. They are tears of healing and it just touched a nerve. Maybe this is my strongest negative core belief. I learned early on from kids at school and other people, that I was not good enough and I didn't know why. I just wanted to belong like everyone else. I believe one of my behaviors today is trying to compensate for that and it might be another issue as well. I think the reason why pets are so important to me, is because they just love you and I've had a lot of pets, because I'm trying to buy love, that I couldn't get from people. It also may stem from not having control. My parents wouldn't let me have pets and as an I adult I decided I could have as many as I want. I feel really vulnerable right now and exposed. I know I could keep this to myself, but maybe it will help someone else. I know have learned another thing, that I subconsiouly married my first husband, to constantly reinforce that I wasn't good enough. He was really good at that. And, one day I stood up for myself and kicked him out, because I didn't want to be treated like that anymore and I didn't want my daughter to think that it is okay for someone to treat her like that. I didn't want her to repeat the cycle. I didn't see it then. How could I have been so mean to myself to allow someone to do that to me. I just didn't know. It's a shocking revelation. Well, I need to get myself together. I'm shaky and I'm trying not to focus on my breathing. I can handle this I have my coping skills and I will be alright. Thanks for listening.

13 years ago 0 +0 / -0 1071

Negative Core Beliefs - Part II

Thank you Davit for your insight. You make perfect sense and I can relate to the knitting analogy. I am going to do the mirror reinforcement. I'm glad when I can't see outside of my situation, that you are there looking in from the outside and can help me see what you see. If that makes sense. I truly appreciate you more than mere words can express.

13 years ago 0 +0 / -0 1071

Our Favorite Posts!

I'd like to encourage the silent people. I had anxiety about posting, at first. But, I realized it's just because this was a new experience. I have never done anything like this before. From personal experience, everyone here is very kind and understanding. No one judges anyone or thinks anything bad about anyone. If you participate, you will find more specific answers that you are looking for and by sharing your experiences, you will help others. We value you and your opinions. It's okay to be silent, because we are glad you are here. But why not try to step out of your comfort zone. Don't get caught up in the "What if's" What will people think, etc. Instead of thinking of what could go wrong, think of what could go right: you could find help, help others, and make a lot of friends. We think you're great, we are all here for you whenever you're ready. If you take a leap, we will catch you. Your friend Shari

13 years ago 0 +0 / -0 1071

Myth or Fact?

This is just my opinion. I believe both can happen. I believe God gives us wisdom to help ourselves and I also believe that God can heal a person.

13 years ago 0 +0 / -0 1071

Myth or Fact?

Thank you Davit.

13 years ago 0 +0 / -0 1071

Your top 3 - Thought-Provoking Questions

My favorite age was 19, but I like the age I am now, because of what I know now. I'll be 48 in September. Never trying is worse than failing. I prefer sanctuarys where animals are in their natural habitat with acres and acres of room to roam sorta free in a protected environment. I forgive myself for not being kind to myself like I am to others. I don't have a thought provoking question, but I do have a thought provoking statement. "Just as the caterpillar thought the world was over, she became a butterfly." That's how I felt when I found The Panic Center :)

13 years ago 0 +0 / -0 1071

Reminder of the Day

Today is a gift, that's why they call it the present. I find that by staying in the present it's easier to stay positive. For me, anxiety can creep in when I think about the future. For example, an upcoming road trip, or a doctor appointment. I'm not there yet, so if I put it out of my mind until the actual time arrives, I feel less stressed. Also, anxiety can creep in when I think about the past. I can't go back and change things, but I can change my attitude about it. I just tell myself that, "I did the best that I could, with the knowledge I had, at the time."

13 years ago 0 +0 / -0 1071

Exposure Success Story

I had another exposure session today involving another 3 hour road trip to meet my brother and his wife for lunch. Here is a don't for me. Don't have my daughter show me a trailer of a scary movie on her computer before getting in the car. It set me up for anxiety. Friday traffic is as congested as Saturday traffic (like last week's exposure). I left my "worry" sea shell at home, but found a keychain to hold onto. I had to pull out my emergency panic papers with positive statements on them and read them. I closed my eyes for a long while. I asked my husband if he could take me home and said that he and my daughter could go to lunch to meet my brother instead. He calmly smiled and kept driving. We stopped in one town, before getting to the destination town, and I was able to get a knitting pattern booklet and we were a bit early to meet for lunch, so we stopped at a book store. I bought every U.K. knitting magazine they had on the rack (exposure is expensive :) We continued our trip and made it to lunch. We had a lot of fun laughing and the time went by too fast. It was slower going home and I felt impatient, but got out my magazines and the lights seemed to change quickly. In the past I would have focused on the negative, like all of the coping skills I had to use to get through this trip. And, I would have compared it to the last trip and tell myself I did better last time. But, my focus is on the positive. Although, I was less anxious on the last trip, this was still a successful trip, because I did the trip. I didn't make my husband turn around and take me home. I am blessed to have a very calm husband and daughter and their calm is a huge influence on me and it's gratefully contagious. I just wanted everyone to know that not every exposure is going to be perfect or go the way you think it should have gone, but regardless of how you get to the end, it is still a success, because you crossed the finish line.

13 years ago 0 +0 / -0 1071

Need help with exposure.

Hi,

There are several great posts that give lots of ideas about how to cope in the car. That was my issue and I found that reading other people's ideas about what they do, really helped. I have also posted as well. There are too many to name, but if you search around a bit, you will find the answers you are looking for. I know you will get better as I have. The sessions in this program really help and there is so much support here and so many friends. Welcome. Your friend, Shari

13 years ago 0 +0 / -0 1071

Reminder of the Day

Another way to stay positive, is to think about all of the things you do have and not focus on the things you don't have. Life is about perpetual change, nothing ever stays the same. So, if you're not happy where you are now, it won't be like that forever, it will change.

today's top discussions:

This Month’s Leaders:

Most Supportive

Most Active

Most Loved