Right now I am just really upset because my dr. said that if was too difficult he would give me a few more clorazepam but when I called him this a.m. and told him what happened Sunday, he said he would not give me more...to keep up with my coping skills. I know this is a good thing , but I just feel so let down ...like he was waiting for me to send my letter to my surgeon and then just let me drop. That's not what it is, I know, I just feel that way. He will however try and set me up with a counsellor in addition to our weekly groups.
I am terrified at how the week will go, afraid that I will go back to what it was 2 months ago. My reasoning mind knows this is incorrect because the amitriptyline has had time to function fully in my system but my anxiety is having a real field day with this now.
I will simply continue what I was doing. It's just that yesterday nothing I tried seemed to work, probably because I was so disappointed that I had such bad anxiety and angry that I was going through it all again.
I wish you all the best on your efforts to quit smoking. Its hard but you have succeeded at much more difficult things ,so this should be much easier. I used to smoke about 1 1/2 packs a day years ago, then with my son having asthma we had to stop smoking in the house. From that I went down to 1/2 a pack a day, still smoking but alot less.
I had almost quit just before my surgery and I had bought the nicotine inhalers as well as the gum, but then the anxiety problem surfaced so up went the smoking. Shooot! Well one hurdle at a time.
Good luck to you! Oh! and yes your roses are just beautiful ....can't help but smile when I see the photo. Wish it was a scratch and sniff screen lol
When an anxiety attack comes, I know to fill out the anxious thoughts form but if there is a sense of fear and panic does one also fill out the panic form? Or are the panic forms for specific events or situations?
I've printed out a whole bunch of new forms to work on.....I'm mad now lets hope that my anger will push me to get this right once and for all.
P.S. I'm not mad at anyone just the situation and me
Ahh! Davit, you always have a way of reassuring me that what is going on is okay. Thanks, from the bottom of my heart.
I did have sort of a "I won" yesterday morning when I woke up and was so proud of myself for having handled the anxiety the night before and still getting sleep. You are right I am moving to fast , so I will make an effort to slow it down a bit and start again from the beginning. I have been filling in my forms and will continue to do so.
I'm so sorry you injured your leg and I do hope that it heals quickly and lets you continue on with your yard. You are such a strong person...it gives me something to strive for.
In the summer time I do alot of gardening and fussing with my flowers. I can't do as much as I use to but I love the smell of the dirt when you plant your flowers or after the garden plot has been rototilled.
In the winter , I started doing paint by numbers...it doesn't sound like much but each one would take me about 1 month to complete. I order them on line from a reputable company and they always turn out very well. I have done peonies, a hummingbird and two wolves. There is still one in my closet of a racoon clinging to a tree...haven't started yet because often times my hand are a little to shaky.
When I worked at the dog grooming salon , I made two sided Christmas scarfs to slip on the dog collars, so every pup had a nice scarf to go home with after their grooming.
I don't know if baking counts as creativity but I like that to.
Monday and Tuesday weren't too bad actually...the anxiety was mostly in the a.m. then the afternoon was fine. Even had a decent sleep last night. So far today is more difficult. My session was this morning so the anxiety wasn't too bad, there but it always feels better when I am there. This afternoon though I was listening to one of my relaxation cd's and just felt like I forgot to breathe ( was very relaxing, I thought ) but after that I had anxiety...just plain afraid...don't even know why, to tell you the truth, so I took out my workbook and filled all the forms and read a bit more in my other book.
It did ease somewhat...and my son is home today , so just having him in the house helped. I still went outside and mowed the back lawn but had no real interest in doing more. I guess I feeling down because of it...must be a poor me moment.
At group I was asked if I was interested in an Anxiety Applications Group and I said yes. We have to pick a specific goal and with the help of the group leaders they will review treatment options, develop a plan and we will recieve support while applying the treatment strategies. I figure it's worth a shot.
Okay, i'm running at the mouth, just needed to talk to some friends.
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