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Posts created by Miki

15 years ago 0 +0 / -0 477

Exposure Planning Session 4

Ooh, how do you do the progressive muscle relaxation?

Sometimes, when I'm anxious before I sleep, I started to think about when I sleep since I try so hard to sleep that it ends up waking me up. The noises and such doesn't really bother me.. I get scared that I don't know when I fall asleep. I know this is one of my obsessive thinking again.

So here I am on day 3! In 24 hours I should be at home sweet home. Last night, I went to my friend's apartment to eat dinner but I was anxious the whole time there. I just wanted to leave and go back to the motel. I was so hungry and everything smelt so good, but I was so grossed out about my stomach that I only at a bit. I felt so bad for my friend because I didn't really say much and it's been a while since we saw eachother. I couldn't even help make the dinner, so I tried my best to at least do the dishes but I thought I might faint and I couldn't finish. I cried on the way back to the motel... which made me feel better a bit and once I got back to the motel, I was perfectly normal. I just hate that. But my husband did mention, "Hey, your comfortable with the motel now!" Which is true... this makes me realize more and more that I get anxious with people other than my comfort person. I am most comfortable with my mom, but I don't like to be because I feel like she doesn't need to 'worry' more about me in the negative sense. I am comfortable with my husband because he is complete opposite of me and never gets sick, always confident, and always happy... somedays, sorry, but I worry when he'll leave me for being so blue.

Another thing I realize is that my comfort place can change! I thought my room in my house was the only place I felt safe, but I do actually feel safe in this motel. I am starting to believe that practice can make some changes.

Later on, we are going to go to the beach. I can't wait because I LOVE the beach here. (Anxiety better not ruin it! I hope the beach will cure it.) And I will see my other friend who will be leaving to another country for a year.

15 years ago 0 +0 / -0 477

Hello all from Australia.....

Welcome Char.

I know how critical we all can get especially when we think of ourselves as "not normal" but take your time because we all have our own pace. I recently got off my SSRI also... it's about to be four months since I did. I am feeling like it beat me up a lot for stopping them and many times I've thought I wanted to go back. And I think it's ok, if I did, but I just want to challenge myself for another 2 more months to see where it will take me. I can say as of this exact moment, that I have seen progress in myself. A lot of it is thanks to this site, so welcome!

15 years ago 0 +0 / -0 477

Exposure Planning Session 4

Hello all! And thanks Danielle, for the relaxation methods.

I just wanted to update about my trip. I'm back home now and I want to post this in the SUCCESS section, because I feel really good, and I can honestly say that. The last day I was there, I went to the beach and one moment I did get anxious but I got back up again and nature just made me highly happy. I got a headache the day we left because I was so tired, but today, I feel excited. It's really been a while since I've been excited about anything. I'm remembering how much I used to enjoy traveling and I think the smell of the motel or something really reminded me of my passion and it's triggered me. I'm really glad I did it and went on the mini trip. I want to go somewhere again! I thought I will never say that again, but here I am.

15 years ago 0 +0 / -0 477

vent , wobble, wibble & scream !

Hope you are feeling better. If it's muscular then maybe stretches might work?

15 years ago 0 +0 / -0 477

No need to read, just doing some major venting...

Hi Diva, I am in the low side again myself. And as sad as it may sound I found relief in your entry. I don't want you to be sad... but why is there a comfort when I know someone else is too???? That's nuts!!! But anyways, I guess that's how it works?? My room is such a mess too... and there's this thing in me that thinks that maybe if I clean my room my emotions will get clean too. That sort of excites me, just by thinking about it, but I still haven't cleaned! I am feeling better then yesterday, but yesterday, I decided I should take my dog for a walk. I really didn't want to but from not expecting anything, it was really nice seeing the sunset and the pretty trees in my neighborhood. I only went out for like 5 minutes (my dog is old) but I was really glad that I did. I sometimes just step outside and sit on the steps and look at the sky. Nature really helps when I am blue. And I give myself small credit for at least stepping out, even if it's 1 min.

I went to the eye doctor with my mom yesterday, since I thought I felt fine. This was an appointment for her and I thought I can help her out by just going with her. But on the way there, I felt nauseous again and I got really disappointed in myself. I can't even give her something back! I thought. So, I waited in the car until she finished and on the way back home, the chair in back of me kept rolling, so every time my mom put on her brakes, the chair would crash into my chair and hit my head. This made me really furious, because I felt like when something bad happens, it just keeps happening! Now I think about it, it's kind of funny, but I sooo didn't want to laugh then! And of course my mom is starting to have glaucoma. I don't want to be a burden to her anymore... and I hope I can be of some kind of help for her. Anyways, thats my story.

I hope today is better for you, Diva. I want you to know that you've really helped me out a lot!!

15 years ago 0 +0 / -0 477

Is this Anxiety?

I think I've written about this before, but I often feel this tightness in my chest area. Sometimes it feels like it's connected to my esphoagus(sp?) and up to my throat and down to my stomach. I really can't describe it but it feels like it might be my lungs too? But I never cough or wheeze. And there is no pain. It feels like something is pushing it down with weight and I feel like I can't breathe. Sort of the feeling before you want to cough, but you don't. Does anybody have this? It's like a dry cough, without the coughing.

15 years ago 0 +0 / -0 477

Hello Dave,

Just like DazedMommy says, I don't think you're overreacting. This is a difficult phase and all of us have it in our own ways, well at least all of us on this site. It really does make me feel like I'm going insane too. I feel like I've been helped a lot thanks to the people here so I hope you will find that comfort too. Keep writing because it really helps both of us and something I try to keep in mind is that we all have a different pace.

Welcome!

15 years ago 0 +0 / -0 477

I have a success...

Hi DazedMommy!

Thanks for sharing your success, it's really nice to hear it and I feel like maybe I can do it too. Congrats. I'm taking my online classes right now, and they are difficult!!!

15 years ago 0 +0 / -0 477

Exposure Planning Session 4

Thank you all!

15 years ago 0 +0 / -0 477

Hi Dave,

I agree with Danielle, Cornish Dee and Birdie. I think you did such a giant step in joining here at least... and maybe you can practice expressing yourself here a little first before you go onto your bigger steps. You are doing a great job! I am also embarrassed at crying... and I've been to see a Therapist and so many times I held it in... but the moment you do it, it is such a relief. There are some other posts on how to find good therapists so maybe you want to check those out here too. Good luck!

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