I made it 20 days and caved

SammiJo, thank you for the post. I will definitely be reading. Porky, the anxiety attack is there but very managable now. You know how they do....You feel them coming on and then they become so strong in a short period of time. Then you feel like you need to cry just to blow off the steam. Sort of like opening a pressure valve. And I do have Xanax. I have a prescription to take them only when I need them and most of the time, I don't need them. This attack tonight came out of the blue. Phew!! I still feel tight in my chest but, I'm okay because I know what it is. It made me mad that, on top of the cravings, I go and have an anxiety attack to boot. It just added to my determination because I got mad. ha ha ha Oh yea, I know the next craving will come. My husband is working the graveyard shift tonight so I know I wasn't ready to be here alone, bored, and have cravings to boot. I had quit on Valentines Day, woke up one night so bored, and caved myself. After all of that work for a few days. So, I had to reset my quit meter and I'm at it again. So Porky, you be very proud of those 20 days!! And, with all of your health problems right now, you're still plugging away at it. I'm so proud of you!! I'm going to keep fighting and I know you're a fighter just from what you've said in your posts. We can do this!! Hugs, Tutti [B]My Milage:[/B] [B]My Quit Date: [/B] 2/18/2007 [B]Smoke-Free Days:[/B] 1 [B]Cigarettes Not Smoked:[/B] 108 [B]Amount Saved:[/B] $2.79 [B]Life Gained:[/B] [B]Days:[/B] 0 [B]Hrs:[/B] 5 [B]Mins:[/B] 3 [B]Seconds:[/B] 27

I made it 20 days and caved

Porky, you lean on me and the whole gang all that you want and need to. That's what we're here for. You need to just keep right on venting. That alone will help so much because the stress in building up inside of you right now. It just breaks my heart that you're in so much pain and so miserable. I could tell from your post that you're sad and terribly stressed out. Porky, please don't be too hard on yourself for smoking after those 20 days. I think you knew, as soon as you were inside of the car, that things were about to become very stressful without the smoke free air and people taking care of you. You may not have planned ahead to the time when you'd be recovering at home. You may not have formed a plan so you could avoid those triggers and deal with those cravings. You have had A LOT on your mind while in the hospital. I know you feel trapped....Stuck in a rut. There's no worse feeling. Not only are you recovering but, you're sad at the same time. Please, keep talking to me and the rest of us. We're here for you. Do you have gum, candy, straws, toothpicks, lollipops, and anything else you can think of to chew on rather than smoke? Oh yea, and a huge bottle of water. Drinking water somehow gets you through the cravings. Make your snacks REWARDS because Lord, you do need them. You haven't even rewarded yourself for going 20 days smoke free. You need to do that!! Look at all of those cigarettes you did NOT smoke. Porky, I've never gone 20 days without smoking. I'm so, so proud of you. Let your husband stay in his...let me guess....recliner (HA HA HA)and smoke while you have the biggest candy bar HE CAN GO AND GET FOR YOU!!! Porky, don't start back to smoking one right behind another. Okay? You'll just become too dependent on them again. Try putting them down now, even with the stress. But keep talking to us while you recover. Take you quit one day at a time. That's what I have to do and it's hard. Real hard. But we can do this thing, can't we. I know we can. I'm right here if you need to talk. Hugs, Tutti [B]My Milage:[/B] [B]My Quit Date: [/B] 2/18/2007 [B]Smoke-Free Days:[/B] 1 [B]Cigarettes Not Smoked:[/B] 101 [B]Amount Saved:[/B] $2.79 [B]Life Gained:[/B] [B]Days:[/B] 0 [B]Hrs:[/B] 4 [B]Mins:[/B

Have an NRT question

Has the gum caused a burning sensation inside of anyone's mouth? If so, is that normal? My son-in-law has the gum and dropped some off to me. I wanted to try half of a peice and my mouth started burning inside. I spat it out. I can't do that. Nope. I really can't use NRT's anyway but I'm having one whale of a craving tonight so I wanted a little help. I think I'll stick to sugar free cherry lifesavers, sugar free bubble gum, and smacking my husband around some. HA HA HA HA Just a little quitter's humor there. This is one really bad crave. I have to get up and do something. Tutti PS Pray me through this crave. K? [B]My Milage:[/B] [B]My Quit Date: [/B] 2/18/2007 [B]Smoke-Free Days:[/B] 1 [B]Cigarettes Not Smoked:[/B] 103 [B]Amount Saved:[/B] $2.79 [B]Life Gained:[/B] [B]Days:[/B] 0 [B]Hrs:[/B] 4 [B]Mins:[/B] 51 [B]Seconds:[/B] 31

I made it 20 days and caved

SammiJoFL, I really enjoyed reading your post. You perfectly described that feeling we get that we label as "enjoyment." I couldn't help but get tickled. But crap, at the same time you described it so well by saying, "That aaaawwe feeling after lighting a new cigarette (especially after it's been a while.)" Shoot, I thought I enjoyed smoking for 30 years too. LOL I don't mind telling you, I had a good day as far as the cravings go but this evening, I'm getting slammed really good. Tutti [B]My Milage:[/B] [B]My Quit Date: [/B] 2/18/2007 [B]Smoke-Free Days:[/B] 1 [B]Cigarettes Not Smoked:[/B] 103 [B]Amount Saved:[/B] $2.79 [B]Life Gained:[/B] [B]Days:[/B] 0 [B]Hrs:[/B] 4 [B]Mins:[/B] 47 [B]Seconds:[/B] 59

over 50 years of smoking

Hello Sunny, Welcome and your stats are very impressive. You're off to a great start. Me, I smoked 2 1/2 packs a day. I didn't always smoke that much but I have smoked for 30 years. When I first started smoking, I remember a pack lasting over a week. Phew!! What happened there? Like you, I hadn't developed a smoker's cough and have often wondered why. Not that I'm complaining. No cough but I was noticing that I get short of breath when doing things that never winded me before. Sunny, I'm quitting for health reasons and social reasons. I know I'll feel healthier without smokes....that's a given. But you know, I'm sick of feeling like an outcast too. When you said, "I'm sick of making decisions based on smoking." Wow!! I thought I was the only one who did that. I know everyone feels like an outcast while smoking but to actually plan things, arrange things, avoid certain situations, and make all of those decisions based on whether you have an easy route to your smokes is ridiculous. I've actually turned down invitations to go and do things that would have been a lot of fun but didn't go because I knew my cigarettes would be offensive. Now, that's pathetic. I was so tired of smelling like an ashtray and feeling so embarrassed that I was a smoker. I haven't had cravings today but this evening, I'm having a pretty heavy one right now, this very minute. My jaw hinges are so, so sore from chewing gum. It's time for another huge drink of water and some deep breathing. I can't take any meds to help me with the cravings. Sugar free cherry lifesavers sure are good though. LOL Tutti [B]My Milage:[/B] [B]My Quit Date: [/B] 2/18/2007 [B]Smoke-Free Days:[/B] 1 [B]Cigarettes Not Smoked:[/B] 99 [B]Amount Saved:[/B] $2.79 [B]Life Gained:[/B] [B]Days:[/B] 0 [B]Hrs:[/B] 4 [B]Mins:[/B] 34 [B]Seconds:[/B] 8

I made it 20 days and caved

Oh Porky, you sound so sad and totally stressed out. Please, keep talking to us. The folks on this site are really giving some great advice and they've helped me out so much. I did fall and busted my butt, ALL ON MY OWN, and messed up a great quit. I had to start over. And my husband doesn't smoke. So, I guess my point is, you want to be a non smoker and you want this quit, and your health is at stake here. Your husband has got to realize that this is your health we're talking about here. Sometimes, a spouse just assumes that we're 10 ft. tall, bullet proof and flame retardant. They can't accept the fact that our health is going down a bit. So Porky, I think your doctor needs to have a little conversation with your husband. I'm sure your doctor would be glad to talk to him and maybe make him realize that smoke is causing damage to your bones and your over all health. Sure, your husband has rights too. I really do believe that. But, his smoking in the house or around you is affecting you. He has the right to play roulette with his own health but smoke floats. Just like peeing in a swimming pool. He should have his own smoking area, completely away from you and the main living area, if he chooses to continue smoking. Porky, I know you're aggravated with your husband and he's hurt your feelings. Some men are good at that. But try having your doctor talk to your husband or, better yet, have your doctor send a list of things that he wants you to do to improve your health. Not smoking or being around Second Hand Smoke should be on that list. You just keep right on venting and reading. Until your up on your feet and can properly reason with your husband,<----that's scary too, make your room as nice as it can be. Hazelnut candles are great. We're all here for you. Keep in touch. Hugs, Tutti [B]My Milage:[/B] [B]My Quit Date: [/B] 2/18/2007 [B]Smoke-Free Days:[/B] 1 [B]Cigarettes Not Smoked:[/B] 96 [B]Amount Saved:[/B] $2.79 [B]Life Gained:[/B] [B]Days:[/B] 0 [B]Hrs:[/B] 4 [B]Mins:[/B] 28 [B]Seconds:[/B] 34

I Slipped

I'm in a very different mood today. Yesterday, I was so nervous because I didn't feel at all mentally prepared for this quit. I couldn't even answer the one question: Is your desire to quit stronger than your desire to smoke? I couldn't give a clear answer to that one. Not one that made a whole lot of sense to me anyway. Today, things are so different. My mood is so quiet, rather withdrawn. I'm not feeling sad at all. Actually, I feel pretty content but so quiet. It feels like I'm taking the day off and just spending some quiet time with myself. Sort of like I've gone a little numb so I can drink gallons of water, rest, have my quiet talks with God, and heal. So far, I've only had very mild cravings today. And even with those cravings, I drink so much water. I keep filling up a one liter bottle. I've drank more water than I ever have in my entire life!! Strange this is, I don't want my coffee. Coffee and a cigarette went together like biscuits and gravy.....One just isn't the same without the other. I have had very little coffee since the 14th and none at all today. I just don't care for any. Thank you all for writing to me and encouraging me. It really means a lot. Tutti [B]My Milage:[/B] [B]My Quit Date: [/B] 2/18/2007 [B]Smoke-Free Days:[/B] 1 [B]Cigarettes Not Smoked:[/B] 92 [B]Amount Saved:[/B] $2.79 [B]Life Gained:[/B] [B]Days:[/B] 0 [B]Hrs:[/B] 4 [B]Mins:[/B] 18 [B]Seconds:[/B] 42

hello back to day one

Hey Niks, Welcome and our quit date is the same. So, we can walk down this road together and keep each other company. Congratulations on your decision to quit. I know you can do it. Tutti [B]My Milage:[/B] [B]My Quit Date: [/B] 2/18/2007 [B]Smoke-Free Days:[/B] 1 [B]Cigarettes Not Smoked:[/B] 94 [B]Amount Saved:[/B] $2.79 [B]Life Gained:[/B] [B]Days:[/B] 0 [B]Hrs:[/B] 4 [B]Mins:[/B] 20 [B]Seconds:[/B] 54

I Slipped

I keep checking in and reading your posts to build me up for another quit. Folks, I haven't smoked more today. I smoked those three during the night last night but no more than that. There are no more cigarettes here in my house or my car. I didn't even know I had the three stray cigarettes I found in my messy desk drawer last night. Today, I've dusted, vacuumed, mopped, washed all throw pillows and throw rugs and made the house smell really nice and clean.....AGAIN!!! I have really nice smelling hazelnut candles burning and I don't want to UNDO that nice smell I have going in here right now. This one is weird but hey, it works for me.....Every time a craving hits, I go and brush my teeth and gargle so that I have a beeeeautiful smile and fresh breath and I don't want to mess that up with a smoke. ha ha ha I know, that one is weird but I'm a little like "Monk." If there's a crooked picture, I have to straighten it. If there's a crumb on the floor, I have to sweep. I can't stand for one piece of junk mail to be sitting out on my coffee table. I admit it, I'm a little on the obsessive compulsive side.....just a tad but not too much to hurt anybody. ha ha So, as long as I'm keeping fresh breath and a clean house, I can't stand for anything to mess that up. It goes against my very strange nature. I know ya'll are thinking, "We have a weird one on our hands here." ha ha ha I admit, those things do sound strange but, I can't get rid of every trigger in my house so I have to make each one different than it was before by placing flower arrangments that I've made on pieces of furniture, cleaning, and using candles and pictures of loved ones. I do want to move my computer but my desk is so heavy that I'm going to have my husband do the heavy work. He's unable to break down or set up a computer so that's my job but the heavy moving, that's up to him. I'll be running in one spot if I were to try to shove this desk. I have to admit, I do NOT feel as mentally prepared for this quit as I did on my Valentines Day quit and look what happened there. That really bothers me. I know it's because I feel defeated and so disappointed in myself and I'm afraid that it'll happen again. That leads me to asking myself, "Okay Tutti, just how committed

I Slipped

Didn't quite finish. It's okay with me that I have to go cold turkey. Mind you, I'm not complaining about that. I hear it's a little harder but faster. I like the faster part of that sentence. Maybe some of you that have gone "cold turkey" can fill me in on the facts of going cold turkey just a little bit. I'd appreciate it. Folks, I've gone through all of the motions, physically that is, preparing to go on with today's quit. But I don't feel mentally prepared. Not at all. I have more tools lined up to deal with triggers and cravings now than I did on Valentine's Day but, I was more sure of myself on the 14th than I am now. HealerWithin, you asked me a question: Is your desire to quit stronger than your desire to smoke? The only answer I have is: I want to continue on with today's quit in the worst way but, I feel like I'm flying by the seat of my pants. I've let my failure from my quit on Valentine's Day really set me back as far as my mental preparation goes. I've lined up more tools now than I did on the 14th of this month but, due to my failure, I haven't dusted myself off from that failure. I've gone through the motions of picking myself up and preparing but, not mentally. I guess I'm dwelling on that failure so that's keeping me from dusting myself off and preparing mentally. I think the answer is: I want this quit so much but I expect to fail and I don't want to feel defeated again. That's not the answer I'd like to give to your question but, I have to be honest. Tutti [B]My Milage:[/B] [B]My Quit Date: [/B] 2/18/2007 [B]Smoke-Free Days:[/B] 1 [B]Cigarettes Not Smoked:[/B] 60 [B]Amount Saved:[/B] $2.79 [B]Life Gained:[/B] [B]Days:[/B] 0 [B]Hrs:[/B] 2 [B]Mins:[/B] 46 [B]Seconds:[/B] 30