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Browse through 411.758 posts in 47.059 threads.

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4 years ago 0 348 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Self Care

Fresh air and sunshine is the best!  Fortunately for me I live in an area where the weather never really gets cold so I can in walks year round.  When I was drinking I never intentionally went for walks.  I did cardio and lifted weights, but never just walked to enjoy the surroundings.  After I stopped drinking I began walking and usually listened to music or podcasts.  I now leave the headphones and enjoy the sounds of nature.  I find it as a great time to clear your mind.  

Lynn
4 years ago 0 348 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
and here I am.

Hello Bretskis and welcome!  I agree with hors controle, 3 weeks is a good start!  There is no right thing to say here, and it is a good place to come to vent.  It can also be a good place to come for advice.  What things did you do to stay alcohol free for 3 weeks? 


4 years ago 0 348 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Month to moderation

High Tower,

Congratulations on one month!  How is your second day?  Do you plan to go long before you try moderation again?

Lynn
4 years ago 0 348 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Month to moderation

hors controle,

How are things with you?  On several occasions you have mentioned going 3 months without alcohol before trying it again.  When I passed my one month mark I thought I would drink again after 3 months but when that time came, I decided it just wasn't worth it to have that drink.  I was too afraid that I would go right back to the what I was doing before.  I mention this because of what you posted below.  I know that you have time before your 3 month mark, but if I may suggest, think about the possibility of not having that drink when that 3 month time is up.  Just my 2 cents. :)  

Lynn
4 years ago 0 348 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Month to moderation

hors controle,

I can hear your frustration in your post.  Try not to beat yourself up too much, all success stories start with a square one.  Good luck and let us know how you are doing.  

Lynn
4 years ago 0 348 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Month to moderation

Hors controle,

This journey we're on can definitely be equated to a long run, it's certainly not a sprint.  Several years removed from my last drink and I still have my struggles.  From your last post I see two great achievements, pouring out half a bottle of wine and writing to your children.  Could you imagine doing either a month ago?  Today is a new day and I hope it's a good one for you.

Lynn
4 years ago 0 348 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 1
Just a thought

Lately I have been reflecting on my journey to giving up alcohol.  I joined this site as a nightly drinker and found it hard to go just one night without alcohol.  Something had to change and I decided I had to give it up. Everyone here knows that giving up your “friend” is really hard but I knew I didn’t want that friend around anymore.  Everything about it was so time consuming. I was either drinking alcohol, thinking about it or recovering from it.  


This post is not to tell my story but to maybe give someone a different way to look at your journey.  This post is to say what worked for me, what gave me that boast in my tough times. I think the single biggest factor for me was what I mentioned before, I simply did not want to be drinker anymore.  Previous times of attempting to stop drinking I told myself what I couldn’t have.  When I decided I didn’t want to be a drinker anymore my focus shifted from what I was denying myself to something I could gain.  Not a long list, just one focus, to be a non-drinker.  


As we all know, the mind is a powerful and it can play tricks on you.  But we can play tricks on our minds too and I think that is what I did.  Rather than thinking about what I couldn’t have I thought about what I wanted.  In the tough times the desire to be a non-drinker won out over the desire to have that drink.  


Everyone is different and has to find their own way. If you’re current focus is not working, finding a new focus may help.  In the end, it’s what works for you. Good luck everyone.


4 years ago 0 348 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Just a thought

Thank you hors controle.  I doubt I would be a non-drinker at this point in my life without this site, so I'm trying to give back.  I hope you have had a great start to your week.

Lynn
4 years ago 0 348 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Just a thought

hors, controle

I'm sorry to hear your week did not start well.  I have no experience with working from home, but I can see how it wouldn't help with temptations.  Am I correct that you don't feel comfortable speaking with clients on the phone without wine, but you do feel comfortable speaking with them in person without wine? 

I'm not sure what I was feeling when I first stopped drinking but it wasn't happiness.  Psychological jail seems to fit what I was feeling.  During the work day I would find myself remembering that I would not be drinking that night and immediately feel a sense of loneliness.  Even if I knew I would be with my wife or going out with friends, the feeling was there.  The first few months there was little that was enjoyable about changing something I had done for so long.  But it did get better and kept getting better.  

How has filling your agenda helped you?  

Lynn