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Browse through 411.758 posts in 47.059 threads.

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4 years ago 0 348 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Hello Again

Vie,
I can hear your frustration and am glad you came here for support.  So your Day 1 begins today.  Do you have any plans for the day?  

Lynn
4 years ago 0 348 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Goal: no alcohol at all .

Hello Vie.  Is it possible to tell your family you are going to take a break from alcohol? 
4 years ago 0 348 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Thanks Ashley!

Hey Sabastian.  I'm sorry to hear that you are struggling.  I think the thread you are referring to is called New Here.  The It is under the main forum heading of Health Educator's Corner.  Click on that tab and it should be the second discussion under this discussion that is titled Thanks Ashley.  If you can't get to it, no worries, just reply here.  
4 years ago 0 348 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Goal: no alcohol at all .

Vie,
Everybody is different, and I'm not pretending to know your family, but I think people have that reaction sometimes because they know they need a break too but are afraid to admit it.  Maybe if you tried phrasing it as your body needs a break from the alcohol their reaction might be different.  Also, as in anything else, no means no.  It's not an invitation for discussion.  You said you are struggling with your own self convincing.  Can you clarify that for me?  Are you trying to convince yourself that you need a break?  

Lynn
4 years ago 0 348 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
New here :)

Sabastain,

Confiding in your husband is great news and I am so glad he responded positively.  Have you talked to him about needing accountability?  Is he facing the same struggle as you? 

Lynn
4 years ago 0 348 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
I?m back

Hey Gus!  Remember me?  We started a journey together several years ago.  I'm glad to hear that you are giving up alcohol again.  In my experience telling people that I was not drinking was the best thing for me.  I feared telling my friends that I drank with but it turned out to be really uplifting, they were very supportive.  I was prepared to break ties with those that were not supportive because if they were truly my friend they would join me in my journey.  My family was shocked that I needed to quit, they had no idea I drank as much as I did.  Alcoholism runs on both sides of my family so they understood my desire to stop.  I think every situation is different but in the end, the more people you have in your corner the better.  Good luck!

Lynn
4 years ago 0 348 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
New here :)

Sabastian,

It sounds like telling your husband could help you a lot.  You and your husband now have a common goal, if household stress is a trigger for you to drink then the two of you working together should help.  How have you felt today after telling him?  

Lynn
4 years ago 0 348 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
New here :)

EJM715,

I think it's good that you went to a therapist.  I think most of us here have had that question about why we do something so destructive over and over.  If we were an outsider looking in, we would think it was crazy.  But we do it, again and again, telling ourselves that today will be different.   

I think the decision to tell people around you depends on how you think they will react.  If you think they will be a source of support, then I would tell them.  Yes, once you tell them there is no going back but if they are supportive and you have a setback, they will understand and help you get back on track.  

 I completely understand the fear of not drinking, I had it myself.  It was hard for me to go a day without alcohol, how in the world was I ever going to be without forever?  Think about this question.  Have you ever heard someone who doesn't drink, either because they don't prefer it or because they stopped, say they wished they drank?  I don't know of anyone.  It is possible, and fun, to live without alcohol.  

4 years ago 0 348 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
I?m back

Gus,
It was easier for me to stop altogether too.  Wondering when I would drink, or how much I could drink when I did, was just too stressful.  I hope things go well for you. 

Lynn
4 years ago 0 348 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
New here :)

EJM715,

I agree with your therapist, take it one day at a time.  Looking too far ahead can be a bit overwhelming.  It did get easier and less scary for me the longer I went without alcohol.  I think it got easier because I learned to live again, not just exist.  Because I was a daily drinker I spent too much of my time recovering from a night of drinking and/or waiting to drink again.  In my opinion, that's not living.  

The human mind does not like change and that was probably the hardest thing to overcome, the habit of drinking.  It seems so strange now, why I thought things were good and fun when I was drinking and in reality I was a prisoner in my own house.  Alcohol is powerful but you can be powerful too!  

Lynn