Hi everyone
I believe what everybody said is correct for them. There are different kinds of isolation one total Social isolation refers to the objective lack of contact with conspecifics (means the same species human). In humans, it may be cause by a pervasive withdrawal or avoidance of social contact or communication. It can contribute toward, or be the result of, many emotional, behavioral and physical disorders including anxiety, panic attacks, eating disorders, addictons, substance abuse, violence and overall disease. This I got from a definition, does this mean it is you? No. People can experience different kinds of loneliness or social isolation. One can be being alone with yourself and it is pleasurable to you to be alone and sit and read a book or contemplate things. The definition above is for people who feel lonely, some people can be with people and still feel lonely if this is your problems then you are more likely to be the definition above. One final thought, all some people need is one significant other does not have to be a wife or husband but some who will always be there for you if you lack this then again I think you are in danger of the definition above. If you choose to have few friends or even one that you can count on and you do not feel lonely then, as you said, you are ok. When I said I was big man on campus I do not feel that I need this anymore, however I think I need a least one person who is in my life with consistency, as you said I have no problem with being alone because I always have that one person.
Dizzy
Davit
I am going to tell you an experiment that was done I was not statistically significant in that there were not enough people in the study to make a strong conclusion. They went into a nursing home and split it in half. They were all given a plant to put in there room. In one half they said to the seniors that they did not have to take care of it the staff would water it and prune it, so it was just there to give them enjoyment of looking at it. The other group was given the responsibility of looking after the plant i.e. watering it making sure I got sunshine etc. After several years went by, they found that the people that just admired the plant died a lot sooner than the people that looked after the plant. There were many conclusions drawn from this event but the one I think is relevant is the people that looked after the plant had a purpose in life something they had to look after. Where the people that did nothing for the plant had no purpose because everything was done for them. Please do not infer that I am making a jab at your situation about needing help, it seems that thing are written in post and get misinterpreted because there is no clarification of what the other person means exactly. Therefore, you mention that you lived alone but you also had dog to look after. This gives you a sense of purpose if you have to look after the dogs they relied on you and needed you or else they would not survive. I believe this is the same as the flower in the nursing home. You may not need a human but you need something to wake up for. I going to end this but saying that there probably people that can have no human contact and survive, like a forest ranger and maybe some people prefer it that way. Again, the forest ranger has a sense of purpose to look after the forest. So if you have no one in your life and nothing to look forward to or even a goal which you want to achieve (which we all on the panic centre have in common a goal to achieve), if we did not think that we needed to better our lives then why are there so many people in this program. Joining this group is a powerful statement that we want to do achieve something from this program because we want something else. The something could just be a stop to panic attacks.
Dizzy
I have some not so insightful questions from. I have been reading peoples posts about agoraphobia and before I got to this site I would say that not me. However, one very bright person responded to me and explained there are different severities of agoraphobia. The severities of mental illness are not a new concept to me. Then I started to consider when I was on a Board retreat it was away from home. I started thinking about the experience I had and one is I hate going places where I have not been before. Two every time I went on the retreats I could never sleep in the hotel rooms’ bed.
I have lived my whole life I one house and I think it is like a secure place probably like an agoraphobic see where they are living. I see in my future that I will have to leave my home because I live with my father and this thought bothers me. There are definitely financial advantages to living with my dad which is one way I justify staying here. I have also realized that it is a role transition from sharing accommodations to living alone. I remember when I was articling for my CA and there was an opportunity to go to Ottawa and prepare for the exams. At first, I was going to go then my typical symptoms hit me and I felt like crap. I know that the more things I experience while feeling like crap the more I taint these experiences as bad. When it had nothing to do with the event, I just had to do with how I was feeling at the time. Therefore, is some fear of leaving where you lived all your life a form of agoraphobia or is it just a normal response to a role transition.
I would like to thank you for your observations and insights I guess that my last question no one want to answer because if they sat yes then you give up and if they say no then you’re trying may lead to a worsening of attacks. In either case, there is no right or wrong answer. I have not tried to roll with attacks yet because I am listening to what my thought are during one so that I can challenge them latter. As Davit said perhaps, I still need more thought exposure to my thoughts and this is where I am concentrating my efforts
I would practice this every single day as part of your coping techniques. I remember when learning this that I chose a specific time every day and a specific chair. I would practice this about 10 minutes every day. Whenever I felt anxious again, I would go back to that chair and do the breathing again. After awhile, the mere sitting down in that chair signalled to my body that this was a relaxation time.
Another idea: when I was very anxious and not breathing properly, I used to sing. Singing makes you open up, breathe more and it's a great distraction. I used to use this when driving when I got tensed up.
Hope this gives you some ideas.
Your friend, Sunny
Hi Dizzy
I used to count to try to regulate it. By the way it is interesting that if you pass out your breathing will adjust to what you need. According to my Doctor. I think it is okay to think your breathing back to normal the same as trying to lower your pulse by thought which is much harder and probably only comes down because you are distracting the ForF reaction.
I don't belly breath as much as I should for the simple reason that it puts more O2 in my blood and hence to my brain.
Do you think there is a wrong way to do it. Now you have got me wondering if I just naturally belly breath when I'm anxious. It will have to wait because this antibiotic leaves me short of breath and I just naturally strive to get more air in my lungs.
20 more days to go but I will try to remember the question after I'm back to normal.
Bit confused but curious
Davit
I have some questions about breathing. When during an attack some people hyperventilate and others like me stop breathing. I know Ashley said not to use box breathing to stop an attack and I agree. However if you are one of the people who hyperventilate or stop breathing, which makes the symptoms of an attack worse, should you not try some relaxed breathing not necessarily boxed breathing but just relaxes breathing so you are behaviourally telling your body you are relaxed during an attack. This is part of a behavioural change to an attack am I wrong?
