Hello Ashley,

I haven't posted in a long while so I thought it was time to reach out with a update. There has been a lot of ongoing health issues in my life for long while now but things have escalated recently.

I was recently diagnosed with Stage 4 lung cancer and matatasis to the brain. Of course I have been experiencing a lot of shock, disbefief, anxiety, grief and depression. Things have been happening so fast with so many tests and procedures. I really haven't had a chance to stop and rest.

I feel I am being Fast Tracked into treatment. I finally agreed to and had brain radiation this month and started Chemo too. I am not sure why because I am not cureable. My condition is terminal. I am still trying to figure it all out and what I really want to do.

It's quality of life verses quanity of life. 6 months without treatment verses maybe 1 year with treatments, that make me feel sicker. So far I am not liking the treatments and actually feel the quality of my life is really diminished by them. I feel physically and emotionally worse, not better. And I am Scared more than ever now. I want a peaceful transition not a year full doctors and treatments.

Anyway I am having a lot of anxiety, grief and fear about it all and really think I just want to rest in peace and enjoy the life I have left. But I am afraid that the healthcare system and doctors won't be there for me if i do not do their treatments and will not give me the help I need with pain meds and pallative care in the end. I really am looking for a peaceful transition not a year full of doctors, treatments, sickness and fear.

Not sure what I am going to do next..

Red...

Hi Everyone,

Today I read a quote from someone with anxiety that really resonated with me and I wanted to share: `Please forgive your mind/body for the anxiety, it's doing the best it can given the circumstances." I found this quote very soothing. I often feel we "battle" our anxious feelings and sometimes acceptance is more helpful.

This quote reminded me of the concept Radical Acceptance. Radical acceptance is basically accepting reality for what it is. Fighting reality tends to only amplify emotions. An example of Radical Acceptance with anxiety is instead of ruminating on the anxious thoughts we have and being angry or resentful that we have them at all, instead we accept the feelings and focus on coping with the feelings.

This quote also reminded me of Self Compassion. I hear so many people who struggle with anxiety beat themselves up for being unable to control their anxiety. Instead of beating yourself up, I think it is more helpful to acknowledge how hard anxiety is and how much you have to go through regularly. Acknowledge that anxiety is very difficult to manage and you are doing the best that you can.

I would love to hear what other members thought about this quote!

Thanks for reading,

Ashley