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11 years and counting

Timbo637

2024-10-31 6:49 AM

Quit Smoking Community

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Feels like hell week all over!!

Timbo637

2024-10-30 9:38 AM

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Roller Coaster Withdrawal

Timbo637

2024-10-14 12:28 PM

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Smile....and don't shoot the messenger

Timbo637

2024-09-27 3:17 PM

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Quote of the day


13 years ago 0 4027 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Quote of the Day:
If there exists no possibility of failure, then victory is meaningless.
- Robert H. Schuller


 
Reminds me of the nobel prize winning chemist Polyani who stated "anything worth doing is difficult"
13 years ago 0 4027 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Quote of the Day:
The first requisite for success is the ability to apply your physical and mental energies to one problem incessantly without growing weary.
- Thomas A. Edison

This means balancing all the demands of life, because one has to be wary of becoming weary
13 years ago 0 4027 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Quote of the Day:
Some defeats are only installments to victory.
- Jacob Riis

This is the kind of banking I want to do
13 years ago 0 4027 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Quote of the Day:
Whether you think you can or whether you think you can't, you're right!
- Henry Ford


 
This stresses the importance of what you think, and how events follow your thoughts, emphasizing that need to choose the best thoughts.
 
Decisions are part of those processes.  With an imminent home renovation, I found my slow pace of life sped up, finally taking a time one morning to read about the "tyranny of choice" from Wayne Muller in the book Sabbath.  With an analogy to gardening, I could understand that taking a period of time during the day for rest, is like  restricting yourself in permaculture to a patch of grass, since it protects one from  the rest of the day's infinite speed and decision-making with perfectionism.  In that period of time or patch, we can ground ourselves and search for something which is central to us.
 
Then we have to hurl ourselves back into the pulse of life, connected to the frenzy of society with its different pace, but refreshed and ready and confident
13 years ago 0 4027 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Quote of the Day:
Do not look where you fell, but where you slipped.
- African Proverb

Looking for causes for our falling is more important than being self-critical
 
13 years ago 0 4027 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Quote of the Day:
Ability is what you're capable of doing. Motivation determines what you do. Attitude determines how well you do it.
- Lou Holtz

We can't leave people out of the equation though
13 years ago 0 6252 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Hugs4U

One thing we will always have is the past. The future we can change but the past is ours forever. It is not so bad to look at the past, after all that is how we control the future. It is when we repeat the past that it is a problem. Some of the past gets coloured over time and isn't accurate.

When I was in my thirties with my first wife my father got dementia and much as we tried we could not work and take care of him. Trying was destroying us so we had to put him into a home. The strain was intense but what could we do. We did not have enough money to bring in full time help. I know there was no option because I looked at every one and it was not my fault. There is such a thing as fate. This one trauma built a core belief of the primary type which has stayed with me. I have two secondary ones (core thoughts), that I did the right thing, and that I did the wrong. I use replaying one to reinforce the other so that it doesn't drive me nuts thinking about it. The past can not be changed but it can be used. 
With time and lots of positive thinking though it can fade into the far corners of your memory where it can do less harm.
A good way to look at the past is to just do that. Look at it then say "okay enough of that, I have to do something else now, I will come back to you." ( because you can not get rid of it, it is in your memory.)

Davit.
13 years ago 0 4027 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
As much as I'd like to replace my old with new  core beliefs like the daily quotes found on the home page of this website, I find my fear goggles fixate on the things I''ve missed, like why I didn't do help mom with her home, so now there's a backlog.
 
When I reframe the thought, travel for work and stress, illness, volunteer work and different values were a big part of it.  Focusing on this stuff doesn't help, I'm only human.
13 years ago 0 6252 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Hugs4U

Of course you have to compensate and you will have to do this every day of your life. The difference is that normal people do it subcontiously and don't notice it.
Every time your core belief brings up a negative thought throw it in the corner and bury it with a couple (yes more than one) of positive ones till you do it automatically.

Add this to your list of accomplishments and at the end of the day when you are tired make sure you realize that it is the work of the positive that is making you tired not the negative as it appears. Then it is okay to be tired. This is a good tired.

Davit.
13 years ago 0 4027 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Quote of the Day:
Remind yourself regularly that you are better than you think you are. Successful people are not superhuman. Success does not require a super-intellect. Nor is there anything mystical about success. And success isn't based on luck. Successful people are just ordinary folks who have developed belief in themselves and what they do. Never - yes, never - sell yourself short.
- David J. Schwartz

I suppose there's an assumption we have to compensate for the negative core beliefs by thinking more highly of ourselves
 

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