Get the Support You Need

Learn from thousands of users who have made their way through our courses. Need help getting started? Watch this short video.

today's top discussions:

logo

11 years and counting

Timbo637

2024-10-31 6:49 AM

Quit Smoking Community

logo

Feels like hell week all over!!

Timbo637

2024-10-30 9:38 AM

Quit Smoking Community

logo

Roller Coaster Withdrawal

Timbo637

2024-10-14 12:28 PM

Quit Smoking Community

logo

Smile....and don't shoot the messenger

Timbo637

2024-09-27 3:17 PM

Quit Smoking Community

This Month’s Leaders:

Most Supportive

Most Loved

Browse through 411.768 posts in 47.066 threads.

161,278 Members

Please welcome our newest members: Blueeyez, DSKEvan22, AN1568, sparkly123, imatviychuk

Quote of the day


13 years ago 0 4027 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Sunny,
It sounds your brother, like mine, knows how to manipulate you.  It's hard to remove people from our circle of friends when they're related, since they might get along with others in your family, and because we are jetisoned into our past roles, emotionally.
 
If it walks like a jerk, talks like a jerk and generally acts like one...you be the judge of what the person is.
13 years ago 0 1665 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Oh, just had a very bad, extremely emotional fight with my brother.  How to take it?  I asked him to leave saying I was getting very upset.  He refused and called me childish.  Unfortunately I couldn't hold back any longer and it all came out.  Some of the things he was saying were totally untrue and unfair.   Not just saying that to make myself appear good, it is really so.  I rarely, I mean rarely, get that angry.  How to take it?  Trying to be forgiving, trying to understand him, trying to see his point of view, trying to figure out if I should get him out of my life.  This has happened before and he doesn't change, he is right and I am wrong.  Even if something has been written and dated and signed by both of us, he insists on changing it.  I gave up, he can think he won..  I decided it wasn't worth fighting for and decided I don't want to go through it again.  I decided I want to keep him far away from me.  I guess that is how it will become easier, let it go.
 
Sunny
13 years ago 0 6252 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Now I like this one.  Cause it is true.

Davit.
13 years ago 0 4027 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Quote of the Day:
Nothing in life is so hard that you can't make it easier by the way you take it.
- Ellen Glasgow


 
Making it easier is a challenge when you have the sensitivity that makes one uneasy...
13 years ago 0 6252 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
In general terms this might be true for the majority of the population but knowing how many other things control our thoughts it is not as easy as it sounds.
I think "thoughts" would mean "ideas" in this case rather than thoughts in our case. Even at that I'm not so sure. 

Davit.
13 years ago 0 4027 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Quote of the Day:
The one thing over which you have absolute control is your own thoughts. It is this that puts you in a position to control your own destiny.
- Paul G. Thomas


 
I wonder about this given the strength of OCD
13 years ago 0 4027 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Quote of the Day:
It's how you deal with failure that determines how you achieve success.
- David Feherty

Responding is more important that what others think
13 years ago 0 4027 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
"Not to decide, is to decide".
 
For the many years with my main mentor, I had this posted on my wall, where I still can see the tape mark.  This saying meant that if I didn't make a decision, that was a decision anyway.  What I've learned in the many years which have passed, is that time changes opportunities, but my procrastination and perfectionism would harm me.
 
I've also learned that making a decision takes away the ability to choose other decisions.  In Economics, this is called "opportunity cost", since making a decision "costs" you or subtracts your ability to choose other things.  An example would be if you plan a night out, you could choose a concert or a lecture, but the two are mutually exclusive.  Choosing one activity "costs you" being able to choose the other. 
13 years ago 0 4027 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Sometimes I want to plan a lot of reading, and then remember the saying:
 
Of making many books there is no end, and study is a weariness of the body...
13 years ago 0 6252 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Of course, But some of us don't know how to do this. CBT is like climbing a mountain. Knowing when to rest, knowing to pace yourself, and finally,,,, knowing when you are in over your head and it is time to ask for help.

Davit.

Reading this thread: