I was doing okay until I was cleaning out the car, throwing out that stinking ash tray. Giving it all a good spray of fabreeze.
Then I found a pack that had fallen under the seat. Both my boyfriend and I split it, then bought another.
I have told myself over and over you cannot really quit smoking until you just don't smoke anymore. Even one a day, or one a week, you're still smoking.
I have been under tremendous pressure lately. That's no excuse, I keep trying, and trying, each day, each hour is a victory. Even so, that victory is lost because after 30 days, a week, two days, who knows. Eventually I have another one. I don't even LIKE it anymore and I'll still give in.
I'll keep reading, keep up, but I just cannot say that I really quit now.
I have taken a lot of your advice and put it into practice. I got mad. Instead of telling myself that I won't smoke, I've started telling myself that I don't WANT to smoke. I am a non-smoker! As of right now. Because of you all I've started to see how I was sabotaging my efforts. Like, I'd stand around someone smoking just to whiff the side smoke. Now I vow to cross the street. Walk away. The tremors aren't constant anymore. Yesterday when it hit, I just put the dog away and took one of the kennel dogs for a walk. Thank goodness I wasn't alone in the shop (I am alone sometimes and can't leave at all) so I was able to do this.
This morning I woke up sick though. My cough was back and I hope it was because of a cold because I surely have not had a smoke.
Instead of willing the craving to go away I denied it existed. I am a non smoker, this isn't a craving for a cig, it's just a bad feeling that will go away. And it did go away. It went away faster than if I sat around thinking "I want a cig and I just wont' have one".
Today is much better, it's the best day (so far) that I've had yet.
My boyfriend who has insurance (I don't) got a prescription for Nicorette so it will only cost $1.00! If anyone has insurance with low cost prescriptions, see if you can get one for NRT.
You are truly inspiring! Keep up the good work. Now you are able to breathe! I know because that was my main problem too. We can blow bubbles together.
[B]My Milage:[/B]
[B]My Quit Date: [/B] 1/30/2006
[B]Smoke-Free Days:[/B] 25
[B]Cigarettes Not Smoked:[/B] 764
[B]Amount Saved:[/B] $250
[B]Life Gained:[/B]
[B]Days:[/B] 3 [B]Hrs:[/B] 7 [B]Mins:[/B] 47 [B]Seconds:[/B] 24
Chicken first let me say that you are really brave to have gone to your friend's home knowing you would be exposed to cigs. I can't do that. I know now that I just can't be around people who smoke right now. Yesterday, before I knew this, I would hang around people who were smoking just to smell the side smoke. Today I know that it will trigger a craving so bad that I can't work. Today I will cross the street if I see someone so much as light up.
Right now you are so vulnerable, perhaps you can't be around people who smoke. Later is a different story. Now, maybe you need for people to understand that you aren't ready to confront that particular demon. Those who love you will understand.
I have been to the doctor and there is nothing that they can do for me since I cannot take the medications prescribed for this. I did get some sleeping pills which helped last night.
I will absolutely get through this.
Mickey glad you are here. Do you have macular degeneration? My boyfriend does, and he's being treated. There are treatments now that weren't around even a few years ago.
That's one of the reasons I want to quit. I have a lot of reasons why I want to quit. One being that I just couldn't breathe anymore.
Hang in there you will do it.
I don't know that I can cope with all the disasters this endevor is causing me.
Last night I was so upset that I left the shop and didn't lock the door. Thank GOD that no one came in. All I can say is that a guardian angel must have been guarding my door. All I could think about was having a cigarette. That was on my mind so strongly that I forgot to lock up. First time in my whole life.
I spent two hours last night at home just saying to myself, "don't smoke, you don't want a cigarette" until I so stressed out that I took sleeping pills.
I have had tremors so bad that I sliced open several dogs and ran up HUGE vet bills. There were dogs I had to return untouched because I couldn't get it together enough to deal with them.
Because of vet bills and returned dogs my finances have suffered so horribly that I will just have to move into the back of the dog grooming shop.
I can't say that this is worth it another day. I really can't. If someone had noticed that the shop was open, I would have lost absolutely all the equipment computers, everything.
There must be another way to quit. There must be a way that will serve me better.
I use the nicorette gum which does help. I'm probably not saving much on smokes because I buy the gum instead.
I cannot take any of the usual medications because they give me urges toward suicide.
I did this before. I know I can do it but I wasn't working with live animals then.
It's been 24 days now. Shouldn't it be getting better? At least a little.
Can someone answer this?
Are my dreams caused by the NRT? I normally don't dream or remember them if I do, but since quitting my dreams are vivid, sometimes scary and usually involve smoking.
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