I know. I have the same on edge feeling. It's hard to be calm. You feel like something horrible is about to happen. It is the same feelings you get after you watched a scary movie. There's a battle in me too. Yesterday during a presentation I got up and left because I panicked. So believe me when I say youre not alone.
I wish I could private messsage you. Theres no feature like that? Heres my dads email aaherat@gmail.com lol he never checks his account haha but my email has my full name which I hesitate to give out on a public forum. Contact me when you feel suicidal. Also there is crisis lines to call like the distress centre 416 408 4357. Also Amet check out the mood disorder. They offer free support by ppl who also have anxiety/depression. I went there for a few months.
I know you dont believe me but I wish you could talk to my siblings and mom when I say I felt the same way too. I actually told my psychologist the same thing that when I panic, seriously I rather be dead than deal with it. Also just living in fear is exhuasting and taxing. So I know how you feel. I totally get it. But this is what I ask myself and I want you to ask the same:
Think of anxiety as the Big Bang. What happens ... it expands and expands and expands. But then it hits a point that it collapses on its own weight which I call the Big Crunch cycle. Then it retreats and retreats. You my dear are in the end of the expand cycle now with the right stragety and therapy, you will trigger its collapse. Then youll see it retreating and retreating until you be like, what anxiety? Lol. You will reach that point because I have in the past.
I care because I know how hard it is. My family is middle eastern so they dont know what anxiety is. They told me to get over it like its no big deal. My dad still dismisses it. So its really hard dealing with it with no support.
Honestly I go on youtube and I search up animal fails haha. It totally takes my mind off. Laugh therapy is better than any pill.
Also I write in my diary and read self help books because I feel like knowledge is power in this situation. Apparently when you write your thoughts out it is easier to counter.
What do you do for fun? Thats important. Finding fun activities to do. Is your fiance back?
See. Thats amazing. All the more reason that youll make a completely recovery.
Awww. Youll be okay. My sister also has anxiety but she also made a complete recovery. In the past she would panic if I wasnt around so that is normal to form an attachment to someone who makes you feel safe. But its definitely empowering to let go of your security person and know that security comes from you. You are your own rock when your anxious. You feel free and you also free the other person (ie. Sometimes i couldnt go far because she would be too nervous)
This is a good place to start. You said you useto work out - why did you stop? Anxiety?
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