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Challenging Worry

Ashley -> Health Educator

2024-04-20 11:42 PM

Depression Community

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Linda Q

2024-04-11 5:06 AM

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Addiction

Ashley -> Health Educator

2024-04-08 3:54 PM

Managing Drinking Community

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Browse through 411.749 posts in 47.054 threads.

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11 years ago 0 409 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
New to this site

Marylizy, I know your emotions are very much tied to the drinking. I went through that for several days last week. And it is so important to prove to yourself that alcohol doesn't control you!! I am going through all the iterations of that.

Camiol, how has your day gone? Did you hear anything about the new job? My supervisor gave me a nice compliment about how I handled the deadline a week ago, followed immediately by dumping most of the rest of the project in my lap for me to take care of so he wouldn't have to. Doh! STRESS!

I bought a pre-made dinner from Trader Joe's tonight so that I wouldn't have to cook, but tons to do tonight. I'm thinking about you all and hope you've had a good Monday.
11 years ago 0 409 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
New to this site

Camiol, hang in there! Breathe.... Instead of a bottle of wine, why don't you stop at a boutique and treat yourself to a nice piece of amethyst jewelry?
11 years ago 0 409 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
New to this site

And you keep hanging in there too, Jessica. I saw your other post. It sounds like today has been a challenge for everyone all around. This afternoon I got turned down for a project I was really counting on. I've already eaten at least a day's worth of calories and it' not even close to dinnertime. Sigh. Maybe I'll have diet Coke for dinner. At least costume jewelry doesn't have any calories....
11 years ago 0 409 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
New to this site

I'm proud of you, Camiol. Only three glasses of wine in four hours is not bad at all, under the circumstances. It sounds like you maintained a lot of control tonight. No hangover tomorrow, either. Oh, I have my fingers crossed for your new job....
11 years ago 0 409 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
New to this site

And, by the way, I love "Never quit quitting." (BP, what Camiol means is that she is not a quitter, and will never quit trying to quit drinking too much, even if she has occasional rough days like today.) Wordplay somehow makes this easier sometimes, doesn't it?

Also, BP, my advice is to avoid beer altogether. It's way to easy to chug a lot of beer, in a way that you can't really do with wine. If your wine program is working for you, you should stick with that for now. And honestly, if you are really trying to eventually cut back to nothing, I would recommend getting cheaper and cheaper wines that don't taste good to you. Get through the withdrawals that way, without developing a new addiction because you like the taste.
11 years ago 0 409 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
once more

If you don't already have one, you might consider getting a breathalyzer to always carry with you. 
11 years ago 0 409 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
New to this site

It is so nice to wake up to such positive attitudes. It puts me in the right mood for the day. I have gained back my three pounds plus one,  so my goal for today is to try and eat as if I'm a mature, slender, athletic woman and not a frustrated alcoholic. If this whole thing really gets me gaining weight, I'm afraid of what that will do to my motivation. I finally found some club soda last night, but it was hard to find. It wasn't with the rest of the sodas at the supermarket; it was with the alcohol mixers, and it was far more expensive than diet Coke. I may stop shopping at that supermarket just for that reason. IMO, that's really stupid.

I also found out that my favorite beer-and-pizza joint, that my husband and I have been going to regularly for sixteen years, is closing its doors at the end of this month. While I'm not too sad about that (I can totally do without beer and pizza these days), my husband says that we need to go there as often as we can before it closes. Yeah, he's right. I mean we're friends with the owner and the pizza is truly awesome. But it's going to make the next few weeks that much harder. Whine, whine, whine. I know, ladies. These are luxury problems, and I'm embarrassed to even complain about them. So my rant is over and I'll grow up now.

I am starting out my morning with a long walk with my cousin as the sun comes up. I live in the desert, which is so beautiful at sunrise this time of year. It is the best attitude adjustment I could ask for. Have a beautiful day, and I look forward to hearing from you later today.
11 years ago 0 409 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
New to this site

Camiol, I am so sorry to hear about your nasty supervisor. I had a supervisor like that quite a few years ago, and I finally walked out of the job -- and then she STALKED me by phone for several days until I finally reported her! Good luck, good luck, good luck on your potential new job!

Marylizy, congratulations on making it to day 7!! The first week is so hard....every single time. And vodka is so tricky. It's the trickiest of any of them, IMO, because the alcohol flavor disappears into the drink. I'm fairly lucky in that hard alcohol gives me headaches as often as it gives me a buzz, so I've generally avoided it.

So here's my latest confession: I am planning to do another experiment on Friday. In the past three and a half weeks -- with the help of all of you -- I've had only a single glass of wine. I have to say that the daily cravings are getting a lot better as I've gotten out of the habit of starting at 4pm and continuing all evening. I have no alcohol in the house, and I know that is a key factor for me. But I also know that the main reason I drink too much is that I REALLY enjoy the buzz I get, particularly from wine. I think that Camiol and Hope (and probably the rest of you) have similar issues with this.

After reading that little explanation about "the buzz" that I shared a couple of days ago, I've been doing some research, and this evidence is repeated in many websites. The "optimal buzz" happens only if your BAC is between .05 and .07. (For regular heavy drinkers the BAC is slightly higher because of increased tolerance, but the buzz is fainter and doesn't last as long). Some sites say that it always lasts only half an hour or so, and other sites insist that you can keep it going longer. But they all agree that once you get above about .07, the buzz goes away and can't be retrieved until you've been sober for at least 24 hours. This all has to do with the chemical opioid receptors in your brain. The websites that I looked into made a lot of scientific sense. Fortunately, this is also considered a very healthy level of alcohol consumption, particularly if you limit yourself to 9 drinks total per week.

So... I am going to focus on getting my buzz this Friday and holding on to it, because, after all, I've earned it . I am taking a breathalyzer (I ordered it online) with me when I go out to dinner with my husband. I will test myself before and after I drink ANYTHING, so that I can see exactly how much red wine it takes for me to stay between .05 and .07. I'm guessing one regular-sized glass of wine per hour (ish). I'm going to keep monitoring the BAC and "the buzz" throughout the evening. I'll be sure and let you all know how it turns out.
11 years ago 0 409 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Negative Core Beliefs Part III

As Bilbo once said, "It's a dangerous business going out of your door. You step into the road, and if you don't keep your feet, there is no knowing where you might be swept off to."

You have come to a good place, because we are definitely something of a fellowship, seeking freedom from Voldemort's control. Uh -- oops, wrong bad guy. Vodkamort? Sauron? Sauzaron? Anyway, good luck keeping your feet.
11 years ago 0 409 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
New to this site

Here is some interesting information about trying moderation vs. abstinence. There are so many resources out there, including this site!

Research into moderate or "controlled" drinking (for a woman, no more than 3 per day and 9 per week) has shown that this strategy can be successful for people who have not yet developed a pervasive pattern of alcohol abuse, or who have experienced few negative consequences from drinking. You're also more likely to succeed if you're young, female, employed, have reasonable social support, and are confident about limiting intake. The principle behind moderate drinking is to set goals and limits before crossing the line into dependence. But the research is clear: Moderation is unlikely to be successful for people whose pattern of drinking fits the definition of alcoholism. For example, one study followed drinkers' for three to eight years after taking a course of behavioral self-control training. This therapy is designed to teach moderate drinking behavior. The researchers found that as severity of dependence increased, the likelihood that subjects could reduce their drinking to moderate levels, and keep it there, went down dramatically. Thus, for the most dependent drinkers, abstinence may be the only option.

Although moderate drinking may not work for someone with significant alcohol dependence, it may be useful for introducing the notion of change. Many people are ambivalent about giving up alcohol, even though dependence may be straining their relationships or jeopardizing their jobs. The sad reality is that alcohol has become so integral to their lives that they can't imagine what life would be like without it. On the upside, someone who expresses a desire to drink in a more controlled way is indicating a willingness to confront the problem. Attempts to moderate drinking are certainly worth trying as a first step. First of all, it might work. And if it doesn't work, it can help a person understand how difficult moderation is. By paying close attention to the experience, he or she may come to appreciate exactly how drinking reinforces the impulse to drink. Moderation may also be a way to practice changing drinking behavior.