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Quitting tomorrow


5 years ago 0 796 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Way to go Sparrow!!!!!!!! 2 weeks of being a NON-SMOKER.  This is a HUGE milestone for you. They don't make enough exclamation marks for this.  "So l guess lm walking on eggshells a little" It's still early in journey, so walking on eggshells is the safe thing to do. Like you said, you never know when something is going to test you, and the longer you go without smoking, the more confidence you will build up in yourself, and the harder it will be for that darn Nico-Demon to make you cave in. You are doing GREAT, keep it up. You know, you need to reward yourself for all of the effort you have put into this attempt. Make it something nice for yourself.  " I like to get away to the countryside occassionally but l associate travel with smoking so much that l dont think it would work" You know this is a big trigger for you so give it a little more time if you can. You will get there soon. "Another one is if a tragic event happened in my life or something majorly stressful....that could unhinge me" No matter what, you just have to stay strong. Now you need to start learning how to deal with "stress" in a different way other than a cigarette. You'll figure it out I'm sure. 
 Hell week...complete. Heck week...complete. Blah week...in progress and the determination is getting stronger by the day!  
Stay strong Sparrow.
 
Not One Puff Ever
 
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5 years ago 0 175 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Yessssss!! I made it to week 2. I used to dream about making it 2 weeks (l thought if l could make a fortnight ld certainly continue) but l had so many failed attempts that l began to think l just wasnt cut for it and ld never achieve quitting. The idea of and more so the act of quitting was soooo hard for me and yet here l am 14 days in and counting. I feel pretty safe now going about my daily business and this is the freedom l was craving....just to be able to do my thing without thoughts of smoking plaguing me. I still think about smoking several times a day....maybe 5-6 times a day but the thought passes easily enough. Im by no means complacent though because l still feel like if something out of the norm happened it could bring me undone. For example l like to get away to the countryside occassionally but l associate travel with smoking so much that l dont think it would work. Another one is if a tragic event happened in my life or something majorly stressful....that could unhinge me. Ive been able to keep things around here very normal so that lm not triggered, even not leaving the house as much. However life cant stay like that. It throws things at you when you least expect it and lm just not ready for those things. So l guess lm walking on eggshells a little. My hope is that time is strengthening me (even though it doesnt feel like it) and one day l will know that l can handle any challenge without smoking. For now l'll celebrate the small wins  
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5 years ago 0 180 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Another update please!!!! Are we in WEEK 2?!!!
5 years ago 0 175 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Day 13
 
Pappy - thanks Pappy. It is nice to be sharing this journey with you and so true....all we have is our future and the option to make better choices with it. I just feel relieved that lm not punishing my body anymore.
 
Tim- yes it did take A LOT of attempts for me. Im so glad l didnt give up giving up. I think thats the key for some ppl...they just need to keep trying. It certainly was for me and lm far from out of the woods yet but so happy with how far lve come. Deep down l thought l was incapable of doing it. Thanks for reminding me that even though l feel mentally stuck l am still healing physically and so there is always change occuring. I actually did forget to think of the physical side of things. I still feel a little stuck mentally so its such a comfort to know time is not wasted....my body is repairing damage as you said.
 
Stella - thanks for being excited about my quit. So you noticed a "tonal shift" in my post...thats so nice to hear because l feel kind of stagnant. Yes l want things to change 'lickety-split' (haha) but lm telling myself that my brain IS rewiring....l just dont notice the changes unless l look back to 10 days ago, then l definitely feel the difference.  So l guess in two weeks l'll look back to now and see the change.
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5 years ago 0 180 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
So okay, I'm a little emotional today, but Sparrow, your 10 days post brought a literal tear to my eye!  I'm so stoked for you.  You might not be feeling the progress right this second, but it is so clear to the rest of us who are reading your posts that there has been a total tonal shift in your words over the past week.  You have gone from sounding unsure and hesitant to sounding excited, definitive, and strong.  That is MAJOR progress.  I know we all want things to happen lickety-split, but it does take some time to retrain the brain.  And you're totally right - once we decide that we want to quit smoking, it's basically impossible to ever go back to being a "contented smoker." Therefore, if we ever want to feel truly content, the only way forward is to keep on with the quit and get to freedom.  Relapsing starts to look very undesirable when we see the truth: smoking will only leads us back to that misery of being a smoker-who-wishes-they-weren't-a-smoker.  I can't wait for your next check in.  You're in double digits now, and it keeps getting better.
5 years ago 0 796 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Hi Sparrow,
  "Im soooo happy lve made it this far and l have no reason to think l wont continue." It sounds like your confidence level is growing, good for you! See you CAN do this. It just took a lot of trials to get all your ducks in a row. "My progress has really plateued." Mentally yes, but not physically. Your body is starting to repair the damage from smoking faster than you can imagine. "I want to reach a point where l know lm safe but l guess l have to give it time." Don't rush it. It will come in due time. It might take months, or maybe even a year or more. You can't drop your defenses yet because you never know when you will be tested by that darn Nico-Demon.  "Maybe lm selling myself short" You are doing great on this attempt, so don't sell yourself short.   "still having the nagging feeling that lm missing something" Give it some time. Your brain needs re-programmed for your NEW lifestyle and it WILL happen, it just takes a little time. "Triggers are mornings and evenings, stress and boredom" Good to hear that you know what some of the worst triggers are for you. Be careful of them. "Im still so happy and grateful lve made it here." As you should be Sparrow, you are doing great! There IS a light at the end of the tunnel, and it's starting to get brighter day by day for you. 
Stay strong.
 
Not One Puff Ever
 
 
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5 years ago 0 93 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
I find myself thinking some of the same things after 14 days. Then I think about a milestone I have reached in 14 days. After 30+ years of smoking I would have never imagined even going 1 day without a smoke let alone 14 days. We can't change the past but we can certainly make the changes for a healthier future. Congrats on the 10 days Sparrow, keep up the good work!!
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5 years ago 0 175 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Day 10
Im soooo happy lve made it this far and l have no reason to think l wont continue. After putting in all the hard work of week 1 l dont want to have to do it all over again. I will never be a content smoker. If l were to smoke l will always be someone who wants to or is trying to quit. I understand why they call this heck week. My progress has really plateued. Im not getting any better or worse. I want to reach a point where l know lm safe but l guess l have to give it time. Its quite frustrating because the days roll by and l dont feel major progress. Maybe lm selling myself short because its progress to say that l cant see myself going back to smoking. The part lm frustrated about is still having the nagging feeling that lm missing something. I guess a 26 year addiction isnt going to go away that easily. Triggers are mornings and evenings, stress and boredom. Occupying my mind is the biggest help and l dont think l could have got this far without my nicotine spray. Its a crutch l know but whatever works. Im still so happy and grateful lve made it here. Its the best thing lve done in a long time. Giving up an addiction is such an amazing thing. I wish l had done this sooner.
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5 years ago 0 180 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
WHOOHOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
 
7 days is AWESOME.  I'm sorry that you had a difficult situation to go through, but you did it without smoking.  That is such an incredibly valuable experience for you in your quit.  I found it pretty exciting the first several times I handled stress or big feelings without smoking.  Just like you quoted, it meant I was reconditioning my brain.  Instead of the tired old lie of "a smoke will make this better," it was like the fog was clearing and I was starting to see the truth of it: that smoking never *actually* made anything better for me. It was just a crappy pacifier that I had somehow confused or mistaken for a solution.  There is literally no problem on this planet that a cigarette can help us with, except in the temporary relieving of a nicotine craving.  If a nicotine craving is our problem, well, then the better solution is to simply remove our need for nicotine to begin with.  If I have a toaster that catches fire every time I use it, should I stand at the ready, stressed out and hyper alert with a fire extinguisher every morning.... or should I maybe just get rid of the toaster? Quitting smoking requires we keep an eye on the bigger picture, and you're really doing that.  Weloome to WEEK 2 of your quit, this is amazing to read about :)  You're making me excited about my own quit all over again!
5 years ago 0 93 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Congrats Sparrow. You are doing great!!! Never give in you can beat this devil.
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