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For the ladies only please

13 years ago 0 +0 / -0 12049

Debora,

This is a very honest question so don't be ashamed. This is part of the menopause process and you can seek help. Your family doctor and Gyno can assist with medications and more importantly information. Take the time to ask and present your concerns. Male or female, they will have information to assist you.

You can try typing your questions and giving them to your doctor at one appointment and receiving the answers at another appointment, for you to read alone. This can take away some of the shyness.

Hope this helps,

Josie, Health Educator

13 years ago 0 +0 / -0 542

I have a question for the ladies and I hope its just the ladies that are reading this, I would be embarssed for a man too.

If this is too personal of a post and not appropriate and it must be deleted I understand, I dont know who else to ask.

Have any of you ladies, while going through panic and anxiety been afraid to have "intimate relations" with you're spouse??

I dont know what I am afraid of, that I will be hurt or cramp or what? I know this sounds stupid, its been awhile and my Mom always told me NOT to deprive a man, but I am scared, since starting perimenopause everything is different, I have no desire at all and I am actually afraid to have relations with my husband! Isn't that terrible? and I dont want him to be mad or "look elsewhere" that would be bad. My therapist is a man so I feel very uncomfortable talking with him about this, and I see my nurse next week and she is a woman, but what can she say? A GYN would probably not know because I think its more emotional than physcial, has woman experiened this and what did you do to get over it, like I said I could live without it but I dont want my husband angry deprived or upset, its not good or healthy to deprive a man and I dont want to lose him.

If this is too personal or offensive I am so sorry, it can be deleted, Its gotten to the point where I am, according to my friend, "afraid of my own shadow" and before this disorder I was not scared of this. Is this too personal? I am sorry just scared.

13 years ago 0 +0 / -0 250

I do worry a lot about my health. I just would like something that would help. I hate the hot flashes, I turn bright red which is even harder since I am a red head!

13 years ago 0 +0 / -0 542

Hi Sunflower,

I hope this helps, so many have helped me so I hope I can help someone now, this is kind of my department so too speak. I have been getting my monthly since I was 12 yrs old, bleeding cramps bloating *****ty tired etc.........I could almost "set my clock" to when my period was going to start! I am now in perimenopause and everything is much different now. I went over 3 months without a period, then I got two in one month then another two months without one then two normal ones and the last one was five days late and only lasted 2 days! Its very strange, but talking with older women in my life they say "its normal part of the change" I try to hold on too that. Like this month I had a heavy one for two days and it stopped, but its the strangest thing Sunflower, you know how you're breasts get very tender and swollen and sore before a woman starts and then a day or two later it goes away? Well mine are still tender sore and hurting and my period has been over for a week!!

Its all "hormonal" I am sorry you are only 35 and going through this, I am fifty and still having my period! Most women my age have stopped but not me, my Mom was 55 when she died and was still having her's and my gramma was 59!! So I think I have a ways to go, I am not getting the hot flashes or dryness, just increased anxiety and some depression, I almost wish I would stop, at least no more bleeding cramps and mood swings.......I know how hard it is Sunflower, if anything please remember everything you are going through is pretty normal, in menopause things change, I thought I had some terrible disease when this started happening two years ago, I just keep trying to tell myself "Millions of women have gone through it and survived" sometimes that helps, but I am a worrier! It sounds like hormones and that can be fixed, you will be fine.

13 years ago 0 +0 / -0 250

My mother also had the same thing happen. We have the same dr and she was bleeding for over a year. Our dr ignored it, my sister made an appt for my mom at another dr and they found cancer. She had a hysterectomy and has been cancer free for over a year now.

13 years ago 0 +0 / -0 6252

I know this is for ladies, but my first wife had the same thing happen but at a few years younger and it turned out to be a carcinoma. My mother also.

I think for piece of mind you should get a second opinion or even a third. My first wife got it fixed and is fine, My mother didn't and is not.

Just a concerned Davit.

13 years ago 0 +0 / -0 250

I think I am also going through menopause and my hormones are all over the place. I have had my period for 3 weeks, then off for a half week, back again for 3 weeks and now I don't have it. I am sick of it, but I am even more sick of my doctor who won't help me. This has been happening for a long time. I have been put on birth control to regulate. I have also had cysts and endometriosis.

I am 35 and I am going through menopause. It stinks. I hate these hot flashes. I am going to a new dr on the 15th.

You should go get checked out though. It is important and will at least set your mind at ease.

Take care

Sunflower

13 years ago 0 +0 / -0 542

Thank You Red,

I am so sorry about you're husband, I did not know that must of been hard you must be a strong person and I am sure you're husband loved you very much and is looking down from heaven guiding and helping you. You got through it somehow and I am sure it was hard, I hope you had a lot of family and friend support, it does not fix it I know but it helps a little hopefully.

It sounds like you were so very busy with you're husband, focusing on him you did not have time to even think about menopause, that sounds like me ten or fifteen years ago when I was in my thirties and forties, I have a special-needs son and always had to be alert and aware for him, almost like I did not "have time" to think about myself, or it seems to me to be.

I have gone on the other sites about menopause Red and you know what they scare me to death! Its so negative, all these "horror" stories about it, I read like 27 posts and I had to stop, not ONE woman had even a "fair" experience with it it was all so depressing and scary, maybe in this case too much information is NOT good for me, some of the info was a little helpful, but its almost like most is bad, I have decided not to read too much about it because it made me very nervous.

I hope you are feeling better. I woke today with that "dreaded morning feeling" which is so indicative of an attack for me and I so hope I will not have one, my monthly is always a bad time for me and I hate and dread it, but what can you do? Just try and get through it, maybe once it stops I will feel better, who knows? I am trying to stay strong. Thank you for writing me.

13 years ago 0 +0 / -0 2508

Debora,

I just thought I would let you know that if you type in the phrase menopausal support groups into google and click search you will find lots of support groups on menopause..I just did a search and found lots of groups with women posting on this topic..You may find the support you are seeking in one of these groups...

Take care.

Red...

13 years ago 0 +0 / -0 2508

Debora...

This is not something I wanted to post about but since it seems to keep coming up and I don't want you to think that no ones cares, I am responding..I am a female but even so I really have nothing to offer you in the way of knowledge or comfort on this subject..I am post menopausal and have been for 7 yrs. now..I do not remember going through peri-menopause or menopause at all..I was very busy taking care of my husband at home all by myself during those years while he was sick with ptsd and later while he was dieing with rapidly progressing frontal lobe dementia..This went on from the time I was 40 till I was almost 50..I did not even know I went through peri-menopause or menopause till it all over and he was gone..I can now tell you at the age of 57, that I am very tired and I really don't know if it is from being post menopausal or from I have been through in life. I think it is a little of both...

I do not know what to say..I am sorry I can not help you more with this one...

Red....

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For the ladies only please