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Driving over a bridge exposure

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Driving over a bridge exposure

13 years ago 0 +0 / -0 538

Hi Guys,

Thanks, and I will think hard about what you say Davit. I'm so sorry to hear about your two brothers Sunny, how sad. Lovetrees, I hope one day you will go skiing !

Cleo

13 years ago 0 +0 / -0 1665

Yes, I have a fear of drowing too. I have great respect for water and what it can do. I have two brothers who drowned in a boating accident. My parents sold the cottage right away. We never went back, though they bought another one a few yrs. later. About 5 yrs. after the accident, I went to the same beach and swam in those waters. I was alone, I didn't see any other cottagers. I felt happy to be there but I started to feel anxious in that water, having visions of their final moments. I forced myself to swim anyway and didn't come out until I was ready, though it left me emotional.

Years later my older brother bought a cottage on that river and he and I would sail into the bay where the older family cottage still stands. The first time we sailed over the spot where the accident happened, I felt very uncomfortable and couldn't wait to leave the area. I never mentioned this to him. That evening we talked about it and he told me he also got that feeling and told me he didn't sail that way very often.

In this case, the association can be understood. I still love being by the water but I am much more careful and respectful of nature. I don't care too much for speed boats, I prefer rowing and canoeing or a small sailboat. When the feelings come I remember that the accident is in the past, I have a life jacket on and I stay alert. In other words, I try to take care of myself, be responsible. Keep the faith.

13 years ago 0 +0 / -0 6252

Cleo

Think about association and negative core beliefs. I parked on the bailey bridge today and tried to think why a person would fear them. I figure it is not bridges, planes or wharfs but the one thing they have in common. Height off the ground. So if you think about height in stead of bridges you can get all kinds of associations. Nine/eleven! How many people developed a phobia of heights after watching people fall to their death from a building previously thought solid. More association: The concord, an un-crashable plane crashes. But is this even it, take my fear of drowning, it is associated with the Titanic and a Ferry I missed that sunk. In both cases I was on neither but I think about them, "what ifs". I have been in very rough water in too small of a boat but that doesn't bring on the fear. The what if does. So my thought here is that you have a core belief, positive or negative about a close call, to do with height or falling possibly not even associated with you that has built the fear you feel. You can build a positive core belief that tells you the wharf is solid and has a railing and you can not fall off it and it won't collapse but it would be easier if you knew why you have fear. If you can tell yourself that the fear is unreasonable and truly believe it then you can walk the wharf to prove you are right. But in this case I think you really need to find out what happened about or before the time you developed this fear. Think on this and let us know. How about some input from the group. Any one else have a fear that is not directly associated with the fear? It really is perception. How we see things in our mind does control what we can do. Fear is a necessary survival thing, it just gets misused.

Here for you

Your friend

Davit.

13 years ago 0 +0 / -0 356

Hi Cleo,

I am by no means very knowledgeable about fears of heights, bridges etc.. But your post reminded me of a day not too long ago where I encountered something scary that was unforseen and I got through it better by telling myself "you're strong now, look how strong you've become" to quell the fear and negative thoughts. I was feeling very sick, nauseated, and knew I had to empty my stomach (to put it mildly) but I was scared because when i force myself to throw up i sometimes get really dizzy for a few seconds (which feel like eternity) and feel absolutely physically horrible and out of control. So anticipating I had to make myself throw up, I could feel the negative thoughts nad fears arising. So kept repeating that mantra about being strong over and over, and I got through the night with less fear than I usually have when I have upset stomach.

So my thought was that as we grow positive thoughts over top the negative ones, we'll bring those to any situation we start to feel nervous about - bridges, throwing up, etc...

I don't live near a mountain but someday I'd like to ski down one. I can't do that until I travel to do it and there is no way to practice going down a mountain where I live. So I'll have to build up the skills I'll need for that day when I am at the top of the mountain for the first time.

Hope that helped - if not completely off the mark with your question.

13 years ago 0 +0 / -0 538

Big Bridges are one of my top phobias. I'm scared of the height, and of getting stuck in traffic , or being pushed over in to the water. For many years I lived in Halifax where the 2 bridges spanned the basin, and getting back and forth was a part of everyday life. I could drive over them , or take a bus, but could never walk over it. I don't know why, general anxiety I guess, but even driving over them became an issue, then all big bridges started to scare me. I remember when the Confederation Bridge was built, it was a big ta-do ...by then I had hubby, and he would drive ... if we took that one I would go sit in the backseat and close my eyes . I get scared just looking at high bridges in magazines. I've adapted this exposure plan for my wharf exposure, which is a kind of a little bridge, but this is a hard one for me... I'd love to be able to conquer this fear, but there are no large bridges here, I'd have to over to Vancouver, thats not possible. Any sugestions on this?

thanks ( If I could cure my fear of flying and bridges I'd love to fly to San Fransico and cross the Golden Gate)

Cleo

13 years ago 0 +0 / -0 6252

Ashley

I love bridges. I get to feel like a bird looking down, but then I have no fear of heights only a fear of falling. I like to stop in the middle and look around. So what is it about bridges and high places? I don't think it is the bridge itself, they are as solid as the ground we walk on. Must be a false thought that they are not.

Davit

13 years ago 0 +0 / -0 11215

Members,

Do you struggle with anxiety? Today we will be looking at sample exposure plans to help you overcome your fears.

If you fear driving over a bridge…

•    Walk back & forth over a short bridge for 1 hour
•    Walk back & forth over a long bridge for 1 hour
•    Drive somewhere where you can park and watch cars go over the bridge for 1 hour
•    At a quiet time of day, go to the short bridge and drive back & forth on it for 1 hour.
•    Repeat the step above on a longer bridge
•    Repeat the step above on an even longer bridge
•    Repeat the fourth step at busier time of day
•    Repeat the fifth step at a busier time of day
•    Repeat the sixth step at a busier time of day
•    Drive over a specific bridge

Is driving over a bridge a fear of yours?

Ashley, Health Educator

Here to help :)

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