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Sobriety Gang (SoGa) - a support group for staying sober

12 years ago 0 +0 / -0 234

excellent, I believe in you too.

12 years ago 0 +0 / -0 616

Thanks PJ....I probably should dump it but my husband likes to have a drink now and then, he doesn't have an alcohol problem, and even if I dump the wine, there's still other alcohol in the house. I need to learn self control. I appreciate your support very much and totally understand where you're coming from. It does make it more tempting just knowing it's there but I am set on remaining abstinent, and I am confident I can do it.

12 years ago 0 +0 / -0 234

I say this, because I ran into the same predicament. I was unsuccessful

I'm just supporting you and want you to succeed in your recovery!

12 years ago 0 +0 / -0 234

Hi Camiol,

I had to do this for myself in my early recovery. It's just a thought, and I'm sure how how much or how expensive the wine is. You may want to consider dumping it or something.

It's only a recommendation. When I had alcohol in my house, it was always something I knew in the back of my minds was there. It's hard to explain, but I had to get rid of it. Now we don't carry any booze here, and if there is any, it's hidden.

12 years ago 0 +0 / -0 616

Hi Marylizy, I'm also having a huge craving tonight. I even walked towards the fridge in my basement to grab a bottle of white wine. I stopped myself before I opened the door. I'm still fighting the urge and I hope that I'm strong enough to stay away from the basement.

I talked to my BF, she called me and said she totally understands and I told her some of the things I'm going through right now and she said she is here for me whenever I need her. I'm feeling relief and grateful to have someone like her in my life.

12 years ago 0 +0 / -0 325

Camiol, it sounds like Turquoise has a good idea to help you with your problem...I have a few more hours before I go out and just want to check in and say that I am going to abstain tonight but I am feeling like I would love a drink right now. I will go have some club soda and let it pass. You all have a safe and fun weekend.

12 years ago 0 +0 / -0 616

I actually sent her a note telling her I need some space. She facebooked me this morning to ask if we're doing dinner tonight and I very politely told her that I can't go out tonight, that. Dealing with some things right now and need to have some time to figure it out. I let her know that I'm going to tell her what's going on in a few days (referring to my marriage) and that I hope she understands. I haven't heard back from her so now I'm wondering if she is ticked at me. If she is then ill be very disappointed in her because it would make me feel she is using me as company while she's single. That would hurt, but I don't think she is that kind of person. She is caring and very mature so hopefully I'll get a response from her this evening.

So another night of sobriety under my belt. Its Friday which means the temptation is a lot stronger but m getting through it and I refuse to drink. 7 days...wow, this is awesome!

Thank you for the advice Turquoise, if she becomes clingy again, I will definitely use your friends tact.

12 years ago 0 +0 / -0 409

Camiol, when I went through my divorce and Great Depression years ago, I kept calling one of my friends 24/7 for support. She finally, very gently, told me that she was also going through some rough times. She said that as much as she loved me, she needed some space from me to figure out her own personal issues. She laid out a specific time and place for us to meet once a week, because she couldn't handle my constant stress on top of hers. The conversation affected me profoundly, in part because my ex-husband was such a passive person that he never did anything so straightforward, and in part because it snapped me out of my constant self-pity mode. I remember hanging up the phone in tears, but it was actually an amazing reality check for me. It certainly didn't affect my long-term friendship with her; in fact, I respected her all that much more. I learned a lot from that moment, too.

I don't know if this helps you, but you sure seem like the kind of person that people always go to for help, leaving you no time or energy for yourself. Can you find any way to (gently but firmly) insist on some time and space for yourself, so that everyone else stops sucking away your energy all the time. Your friend (and your husband?) (and even your supervisor?) may not LIKE it, but I'll bet they end up respecting you more for it.

12 years ago 0 +0 / -0 11226

Great work everyone!

Camiol, that's a tough one. Addressing this sooner rather than later is a good idea. If you leave this for too long resentment might start to build and it could damage the relationship. Being honest is important; honest about what you want to change and honest about how important the relationship is to you as well.

To think about how you want to communicate this consider how you would want her to tell you if the situation was reversed?

PJ, how exciting! Sounds like you you have a lot of exciting plans. How does it feel to be filling up the void?

Ashley, Health Educator

Here to help :)

12 years ago 0 +0 / -0 409

Today is day two of my current sobriety challenge. Yesterday was very difficult -- it was a long, stressful day, with both kids whining incessantly by the end of the day. If there had been alcohol in the house, I absolutely would have had something to drink last night, challenge or not. In fact, I was rummaging through the cupboards... Sigh.

As it is, I got through and am starting day two of my current challenge. I am thinking of everyone else who is abstaining today, and just the thought makes me feel stronger about it. I almost didn't start this particular challenge, because my husband's birthday is tomorrow, and I thought "why ruin it?" But, you know what? If I celebrate his birthday without alcohol, it won't ruin his birthday at all. That part is purely in my head. Now, if I didn't make him a birthday cake, my kids would never forgive me....

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Sobriety Gang (SoGa) - a support group for staying sober