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11 years and counting

Timbo637

2024-10-31 6:49 AM

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Feels like hell week all over!!

Timbo637

2024-10-30 9:38 AM

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Roller Coaster Withdrawal

Timbo637

2024-10-14 12:28 PM

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Smile....and don't shoot the messenger

Timbo637

2024-09-27 3:17 PM

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When Miracles Happen


11 years ago 0 880 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
working:
 
Yes indeed.  Sometimes I find myself musing about what I am experiencing at any given moment.  And it may be the most mundane and routine thing one can imagine. But even in the simplicity of the moment, I am awed by the fact that it and I exist at all.  It's a real bitter sweet thing...Here I am able to experience me, doing this thing and at the same time having a consciousness that can see that the odds of me being able to do this thing at all are astronomical...It makes my hair hurt...
 
It always leads back to that sense of the eternal that we all possess....
 
 
stay well
 
 
nonic
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11 years ago 0 1140 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
"the key is to appreciate the whole magilla and wonder at the cosmic coincidence or plan that is the reality of human existence. I do. In fact I think it is a miracle that we are here at all"
 
Nonic,
 
It is not only you that experiences this. I can't say that I sense this all of the time or even most of the time. However, I have become more aware the miraculousness of life itself lately. And those little mundane moments that are actually quite profound have been sneaking up on me more often lately.
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11 years ago 0 880 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
working
 
 
Wow that was a powerful piece of writing...I rarely tell someone that I understand because I always think that to say so is to say that I am living in their shoes.  And that is not true...But in this case, I hear you loud and clear and I believe that you too are struggling to hear yourself....Have faith that you are able to do so...In times of our greatest pain there is a small whisper to be heard...
 
 
stay well
 
 
nonic
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11 years ago 0 880 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
ViV:
 
This is a difficult area, and before I make comment, I would preface anything said here with the hope that you are consulting a physician with regard to these conditions. 
 
My heart goes out to anyone who suffers anxiety and/or depression.  Because I share those particular maladies.  And I know from my own experience the role those thought patterns play in this and other addictions.  But we do not have to allow ourselves to be defeated by our own ways of thinking...We are capeable of reframing any situation and make a sunny day out of dark and dreary twilight...All we have to do is know that we have the strength of will to do so. 
 
Here are some points that may help you look at the problem...These are things that I try to remind myself of when I am starting to drift down that long lonesome highway...I hope that you may see some of yourself in them...
 
  1. Awareness

  In order to recognize the nature of the task there is a need for awareness.  As smokers we have always been aware that smoking is a negative aspect in our lives.  The difficulty has been that that awareness, for the most part,lasts for mere nanoseconds.  The revelation is quickly overcome by the desire for one more smoke.  That is part of the circular nature of the addiction.  As we all know nicotine has a half-life in the body and just as we reach a state of awareness with regard to the negative impact the practice is having, the old cycle is renewed as the nicotine is drained from our bodies.  The light of awareness is quickly extinguished by the desire to begin the cycle yet one more time.  

 

2. Acceptance

 

Accept that you have fallen into a trap of sorts.  You have allowed smoking to become such a part of your life that without it,social functions become unbearable; completing tasks always incorporates it,and even your sexual life becomes less than perfect without its presence.  In short, as the old R&B classic goes, smoking "has really got a hold on you"..."I don't want you, but I need you...and so forth.  However, accept also that you do not need smoking.  In fact it needs you or at least the tobacco industry needs you to survive. You need to eradicate its presence in your life so that YOU can survive. 

 

3. Appreciation

 

The third point that I find useful is appreciation.  In the first instance appreciate that you have this chance to quit.  That is fundamental.  Not all people are given or choose to take advantage of the opportunity to leave smoking in the dust.  Even now I do not know if I quit soon enough as I smoked for 37 of my trips around the sun.  Perhaps I have escaped the ravages of my self-imposed suicidal behavior.  Perhaps I have come to it to late, I do not know.  But I am happy and appreciate the fact that I have been given the opportunity to quit.  It is a blessing and should be celebrated.

 

Appreciate as well all that is in your life, although much of it may seem a trial, it all has its purpose.  We all suffer in this life to one degree or another.  We all have trials.  We all have triumphs.  There are times when we are loved and times when we are despised.  There are times when we love deeply and others when we face disappointment and alienation.  The one over riding principle to bear in mind is that smoking will neither enhance nor diminish any of those experiences.  I think (and this is only me) that the key is to appreciate the whole magilla and wonder at the cosmic coincidence or plan that is the reality of human existence.  I do.  In fact I think it is a miracle that we are here at all
 
 
stay well
 
 
nonic
 
 
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11 years ago 0 115 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Nonic Anxiety and depression has knocked me off course. Having taken my eyes off the prize I have been using depression as a hiding place and reason to give in to the demon. I have read this string over and over again. Thankfully I found it in time. So I am going to stay as focused as I can and keep building on these days of freedom from! Viv
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11 years ago 0 880 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Vincenza:
 
I do believe that...Weakness is where strength begins.  I think that is why this addiction is so difficult for some people.  We have used it to avoid becoming strong in body and mind.  I am not saying this is true of all people.  But for folks who wrestle with anxiety and depression it is a very convenient hiding place...A shelter from the storm...
 
 
stay well
 
 
nonic
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11 years ago 0 1140 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
I'm not sure how to answer the question, Vincenza. It's not so much that vulnerability has affected my quit. Instead, my quit has brought me more in touch with my vulnerability. No more hiding behind the "thin blue veil," as nonic has called it. No more sucking it up, remaining stoic, and then using smokes as an excuse to go outside and decompress. Instead, I've just got just acknowledge feelings as they come up. It's different.
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11 years ago 0 1853 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Hi Nonic,
 
"It is in the time of our greatest weakness that we summon our greatest strength".
 Another thought provoking and inspiring post you shared - thank you! 
 
Working on it, 
What has it been like so far when you do show vulnerability?  How has it affected your quit?
Vincenza, Health Educator
11 years ago 0 880 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Working on it...
 
 
Nothing wrong with vulnerability...In fact, a self knowledge of the subject is a great tool when dealing with the world at large...It's a tough old place and there are a whole lot of folks running here and there with no idea of where here and there is...Knowing our vulnerabilities helps us bounce off those folks when they run into us...Or try to run us over...
 
 
stay well
 
 
nonic 
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11 years ago 0 1140 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
"vulnerability makes us stronger"
 
A concept that I have struggled with my entire life. Still working on it now. I am actually a pretty tough cookie in real life. Expressing myself in writing and on boards like this is just a baby step at showing some of that vulnerability.
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