Anger is a common complaint while quitting.
When many smokers quit, they go through changes that require some unmasking. Take anger, for instance: As nicotine addicts, we might have swallowed our anger, or lit up/chewed rather than make a scene when something really irked us. It might have been easier and less stressful than engaging in confrontation about some problem. I'm confident that most smokers who were "put in their place" can remember exhaling the smoke slowly at some time or other to decompress. They puffed away for dear life rather than say their piece and end up getting fired from a much-needed job, to offer one example, or be in an in-laws bad book forever, to name another.
In such anger, a nicotine fix became the crutch, the comforter and the savior of sorts, and quite a coping mechanism! (Or so we thought anyway.) Without a nicotine fix, the next irritant to come along might be added to the mental stack of current irritants, until the quitter either learns to deal with them in a new way, or has an outburst.
Quitting is a learning process. In smoking days, some of the time we lit up to cope, and that particular coping avenue is gone now. We have to find other ways. The same irritants exist as before, but upon quitting, the coping mechanism of old is not there. Some quitters will lash out for a while until they learn what is happening to them and how to deal with it. While they are trying desperately to stay quit and focus their attention on dealing with cravings, they may not be aware right away of some of the other things happening to them.
Gaining control over nicotine addiction involves recovery, which in turn involves self-discovery and self-appreciation, and it is a process of necessary change on many fronts, including how we deal with many things.
Some strategies for anger:
Take regular, planned timeouts for yourself. Be realistic and honest: How often did you take a break to light up before? 20, 30 times a day? More? For 5 or 10 minutes? That inner regular need for a break to change your thoughts or environment and decompress at regular intervals should not be abandoned altogether, now should it? Pay close attention to this old existing need. Substitute a breathing exercise or something relaxing and self-loving. Set an alarm clock if you need reminding and keep resetting it. Listen to some music perhaps too, or just pick a form of *regular distraction and relaxation*, and do it for a couple of minutes each time. If you take regular 'non-smoking decompression breaks, you may be pleasantly surprised at the results.
Practice relaxation techniques and adopt some into your routine.
Each day, reflect on, and study your stress levels. Try to reduce the causes of other high stress in your life if you can, by altering the cause. Look at the cause-s. Much of it may be self-imposed.
Get adequate sleep and rest.
Anger can be managed. Study up on anger management.
Improve communication skills. Study up on this too.
If you are a quitter going through this, please explain to your family and friends that this will pass as you recover.
A little note: If you cannot improve on the sadness and anger, I urge you to discuss this with your physician. The problem may be related to something else and your physician can help you through this.
Ashley, Health Educator
