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I hate the days that doom/dread just seem to hang over your head. I have never ever been a suicidal person but I find that if I even watch a show with someone on there doing that or hearing of it, I get very emotional feelings and fear. I think I fear myself in general. Afraid that one day I will just walk off the deep end. I go days of being just fine and then out of the blue I have panic/anxiety and just an overwhelming sence of dread. I feel fear. I hate fear. It is such an enemy. I even stopped watching the news on TV because it set me off in a panic mode. I can NOT hear of another persons heart attack at all. Too many people I know lately have a story of a sudden heart attack and that alone gets me going!!! I have found I am avoiding a lot of things lately just to keep from falling into panic.
Sigh. It is going to be a long night.
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