Greg:
I hear you and I understand...I too am what I call an "emotive" smoker...I believed for to many years that nicotine was a quick fix without the mental pics, if you know what I mean...I believed that it numbed the pain of being a human being...It was all a lie...
The best that I can do for you in your struggle is assure you that I and many others here understand your words and feel deeply for your situation...
By traveling this road with us everyone who loves you in this life will recieve a beautiful blessing from your work, however, that can not be your only motivation...You must become your own hero in this fight and succeed because you have chosen to succeed...If you have a gram of faith in yourself, I promise as the days go by that gram will grow to be an ounce of hope and then into a pound of success...and finally into a ton of joy...
Here is something I wrote earlier in the quit that may convince you that you are not alone...I do send it with a prayer that the words will resonate in your own being...
Smoking has been a part of me for a long long time. And make no mistake; I have been its willing companion. An amazing magician is this substance.
When I was hurt it told me everything would be alright as long as I didn't actually feel the pain.
And I believed it.
And I never learned to grieve.
When I got angry it told me everything would be alright as long as I didn't defend myself.
And I believed it.
And I never learned to communicate.
When I was afraid, it told me everything would be alright as long as I never tasted the fear.
And I believed it.
And I never learned to cope.
When I was happy, it convinced me it was my friend as long as I took it to the party.
And I believed it.
And I never felt total joy.
Keep walking Greg, YOU CAN DO THIS...
nonic
[B]My Milage:[/B]
[B]My Quit Date: [/B] 12/25/2006
[B]Smoke-Free Days:[/B] 55
[B]Cigarettes Not Smoked:[/B] 1,333
[B]Amount Saved:[/B] $385
[B]Life Gained:[/B]
[B]Days:[/B] 10 [B]Hrs:[/B] 7 [B]Mins:[/B] 45 [B]Seconds:[/B] 35
