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strong core belief


5 years ago 0 11213 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0

Hi Maabrell,

Great question. Check out Session 8 for detailed information on how to challenge negative core beliefs and how to create new core beliefs. Basically, you examine evidence (for and against) your negative core belief and then examine evidence (for and against) the new core belief you want to adopt. It takes practice but it does work. If you have any questions while you do the homework feel free to post another question.

You may also want to examine how this core belief came to develop. What did you gain from self harm? What about self harm made you feel like it solved your problems? Did it give you relief? exhilaration? self expression? What was it? Once you figure this out then you can try new coping tools that give you the same feeling(s) but are not harmful. If you feel comfortable please share your thoughts with the group. I, personally, would be happy to help you work on this tough core belief.

Hope to read more from you soon,

Ashley, Health Educator

5 years ago 0 1 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0

I have a core belief that if I engage in self harm, somehow all will be right in my world again. Although, I haven't engaged in this for some time, it is still there. How does one go about stopping this thought pattern

6 years ago 0 11213 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Hi Agua,

Great discussion starter. I think in the era of social media many people compare themselves to others. Unfortunately, it's a known fact that the more you compare yourself to others the more unhappy you become. This is because there will always be other people who appear more together, more intelligent, more witty, more kind, more trendy....I hope you get the idea. We will always only see what other people want us to see and most people do their best to hide any qualities they may not like others to see. For example, some one who is socially anxious will do their best to avoid appearing socially anxious. Someone with a chronic illness will do their best to hide that chronic illness. Someone who is going through lots of stress will also try to hide that stress. We never get a fully accurate picture of those around us unless we are very close to them. So knowing this, there really is no point in comparing ourselves to others because we cannot make accurate comparisons.
 
In addition to this how do you determine if someone is "better" then someone else? If you had a child who felt their friend was "better" then them what would you say to that child? How would you help that child challenge that belief? Use the same logic with yourself. Write down your thoughts and challenge them with real evidence. You agree that you believe this thought is irrational. This is the first step to changing the automatic feelings that come with this irrational thought. With more practice it will start to feel real. I also encourage you to do some work on your self esteem. What makes you feel more confident? What do you like about yourself? What are you proud of? What goals do you hope to work on?
 
What are your thoughts on all this?
 

Ashley, Health Educator
6 years ago 0 12 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Hello,
I have a strong core belief that every person on the planet are special and better than me. I know this is not rational but it´s they way I feel or think. If I meet someone new I imediatly think that this person as a lot of qualities.
So I feel intimidated with almost every person I meet.
How can I little by little could try to change this? 

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