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Shyness or Depression

15 years ago 0 +0 / -0 910

Hey John,

Wanted to stop in and say welcome. Also wanted to see how you are doing?

WildCat, wow that dream sounded like a doozy!

15 years ago 0 +0 / -0 456

Hi John.

I dreamt that my neanderthal drove into the fleuve due to a moment of inattentativeness and the kids would not listen when I told then to hurry and remove the seat belts to jump out the windows... so we had to wait till the car was flooded and everyone was in a panic to get out and swim the strong currents to the rive.

15 years ago 0 +0 / -0 4

Very good morning!!!!!

I agree with your thinking.......we had been together since just 3-4 months or so.......yeah and i'm glad....she's almost off my mind now.......I've started to do the regular things.....that I used to enjoy.......but still not fullly recovered......but thts life....gotta go with the flow.....thts what i'm doing now....

what abt that nasty dream u had?.....just feelin curious.....lolz

nywys...thanks 4 d wishes.....nd hope you have a great day as well.

till later

15 years ago 0 +0 / -0 456

good morning.

I had a nasty dream and could not sleep any more... anyways, you were saying,

your relationship ended two weeks ago, - after being together for how long? The time is important to You. It reminds you that you invested a certain anount of energy and a part of yourself. That is why when we break relationships there is a period of mourning, there is a loss. We lose the person and a part of ourself. And there is a time when we need to withdraw and heal. Otherwise we do not enter the next friendships whole. At least that is what I THINK...

Remember I might be wrong. I am only one person with my own ideas of how we interact with others.

it is 5:15 time to start the coffee and bagels and waffles for my gang. I hope you have a good day.

15 years ago 0 +0 / -0 4

hi wildcat

thanks for your reply.

i'm very open with friends/groups when i feel comfortable. I feel myself as a total different person in company of them. Free from rules, past and just feel happy with them. I like to make friends but there's where I lack something. I don't generally even talk to them (strangers).
As far as the relationship is concerned, two weeks have already gone by. I still talk wid her just as a friend and that makes me feel comfortable, though less frequently.

I'd love your suggestions and would surely act on this one.

Thanks,

Rahil

15 years ago 0 +0 / -0 4

Sarah,

Thanks for your reply and support.

I've been trying hard to challenge them and quite succesful to some extent nowadays.

I think my irrational beliefs/rules and my childhood are the factors that again makes me depressed.

My father is a bag of 'must and shoulds' and had a very negative influence on me when I was a child.

Whenever I try to challenge a thought, for a moment, its all gone but then out of nowhere, i get aware of the past.

So many people suggested me to forget the past, but I'm helpless.

again thanks very much for replying and i'd surely adhere to the boards.............

15 years ago 0 +0 / -0 456

hi john,

welcome to the group.

when you become comfortable with a group, do you remain shy? Or do you loosen up a bit and participate in the interactions?

How recently did the end the relationship occur? You might still be in a process of letting go and mourning a loss. THe internet and the chats are nice safe environments where you are essentially safe. But, face to face (even with family) we expose ourselves to judgements and circumstances that are out of our controle.

Can I suggest a quick look at the sister site to this one... the panic center? ... sometimes the limit of shy and social phobia is a fuzzy one... THere might be a few tricks and exercises that will make the shyness a bit easier. !?!

15 years ago 0 +0 / -0 955

John,

Welcome to the site and thank you for sharing your experience with us.

It sounds like you have been quite reflective into your own actions and behaviours and how these affect your thoughts and feelings. Challenging these behaviours can also be very beneficial but can also be a struggle when you first begin to challenge these thoughts.

You mentioned that you can continue to challenge your thoughts for a minute or two and then you feel depressed again. What do you think it is that makes you feel this way? What is it about challenging your thoughts that makes it difficult to think positive?

Members, what kind of advice can you offer John on how to challenge your negative thoughts? What kinds of successes have you experienced from this activity?

Stay close to the boards John and continue to post, we are here for you every step of the way!

Sarah, Health Educator

15 years ago 0 +0 / -0 4

Hi!

I recently joined this website and presently busy with Session 1. Taking care of completing my home work, every hour.

Now, about me.

I've really been a shy guy, since the childhood and gain respect from almost all family members, as an intelligent, sincere and honest guy. Now, after having a break-up recently, I was and am quite depressed. I tried to understand my problem but couldn't help but observe the following things.

1. I chat very fluently with everybody on the internet, but when actually confronted, I just keep mum.

2. Whenever I'm with my family, I usually dont speak a single word. Just giving responses sometimes, when asked.

3. I had some terrible set of must and should rules.

I try to challenge these rules or try to think positive.....but for a minute or two....I feel good....but again back to the depressed state.

I dont know what to do as such....or how to cope with these emotions.

I tried to get help from a psychotherapist....but couldn't get an appointment due to time mismatch.

But then found this site. I hope this turns out to be a good decision.

Please help me understand.

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