Hi Everyone:
I hope everyone had a Merry Christmas and I hope you all have a Happy New Year.
I saw my pdoc this week and he mentioned that b/c of my early childhood and stress that i went thru may be the reason why I have been having burning in hands and feet now. My nervous system maybe causing me problems b/c of the stress I have endured during my life. I have been in the fight & flight mode during my childhood, and my body is fighting back as as hypervigilant when I was younger, as I was always on the alert for danger. He believes that the stress hormones may have caused me problems now with my nervous system. My wiring is mixed up b/c of what happened to me in my early childhood.
He did ASSURE me that this is NOT a psychological problem, as it is a real pain that I am experiencing. That meant ALOT to me, that he doesn't think I have a somatic disorder and he believes the mind, body and spirit are all connected. As my pdoc says "My Body is my friend" and I have to believe that and listen to my body and be nice to it.
On Christmas Eve I had to call the pain clinic and get the cesamet increased by the approval of the pain dr at the pain clinic. The pain has subsided down since I increased the med and I see the pain clinic on Dec 30, 2008. My depression is very prominet when I recieve the burning pain in my hands and feet that is unbearable. When the level of my pain is tolerable then my depression is mild.
I also have created a chart, that I enter in EVERY Day that shows my mania/depression/irritability/anxious and how many hours I have slept the night before. I use a system of norm, mild, mod, severe. I also put in the comment section on how I was feeling and what I did during that day. I showed this to my pdoc and he kept it for my file, as he found it helpful. This will also be valuable when I see another shrink in January for the second opinion to see if I do have bipolar disorder. This is just a modified form of the mood charts on the internet. I created this chart using Word Word Processing.
I also am starting to REDO this CBT depression program and I want to do it in one week at at time. When I started I did 4 weeks in one week and then stopped. I want to really understand this CBT program, and I also have a workbook on DBT that I want to use in between doing this CBT depression program. My pdoc also mentioned to work on mindfulness, I have info intellectually but now I want to use the information practically.
I also have to realize when I am in a CRISIS before I get in major crisis. I know it intellectually but not practically. I want to look into my 8 C's of my center which are: Calmness, Curiosity, Compassion, Confidence, Creativity, Connectedness, Courage and Clarity. I want to be aware that I want to use these 8 c's. For my next app't in 7 weeks I want to work on these 8 C's and do some drawing and scribbling before my next pdoc app't on Feb 10, 2009.
I hope you all have a great day, and I would be interested in hearing other people's view on stress and your body.
Thank You
Windsy
i just got on abilify, my shrink says soft bipolar....i'm confused, you seem on top of it. what do you make of that diagnosis? i'm 50 and he's the 1st to mention it or agree with me. maybe we are just trial and erroring....it here. i don't know....went from lexapro to lexapro/wellbutrin to pristiq and it was horrible. headaches, p*ssed off, etc. let me know what comes out in the wash - do you recommend a 2nd opinion......thanks windy! also, sorry about the pain - i thought you had that worked out. you discovered it's what paula abdul has, no? 
