Hi Flyfree I'm a newbie to AHC and a "long" time steady drinker started in my early twenties and now in my mid forties... I know this site with the words of encouragement from others, their support and personal stories have helped me a lot dealing with and recently stopping.
I just keep learning from each day of what I really want and don't want in my life. Don't give up and stay focused on what you want...
-K
How are you doing today?
Thanks Kez and Elektra for the feedback! I am going to talk with someone in a week or two.
How are you both doing with moderating or stopping your drinking?
It is very true Dave- in the US alcohol is everywhere... I actually got annoyed yesterday with a Maker's Mark commercial on TV. Maybe I'm just more aware of the constant barrage of alcohol everywhere you go, getting sick of the unconscious acceptance and glorification of drinking. Here in the US I can't even go to the pharmacy, there is a aisle of hard liquor conveniently located next to the pain killer aisle? Go figure...
Anyways. I agree with desensitizing yourself is the best bet.
I picked up a bottle of scotch the other day opened it and just took a couple of smells to see how I would react. I was surprised I wasn't overly craving to sake a sip... I thought of the consequences I would have to deal with if I restart.
Your right about dealing with those few hours you would be around drinking in social situations but getting through those times will be rewarding. I've been totaling avoiding anywhere drinking will be present. I know I can't do this forever.
-Kirk
Hi Elektra, I want to just reiterate some the best advice I've read on here the during my first week. I was confused what was triggering me to drink, and I found not being in touch with my emotions was a huge trigger. I know it's tough when your drinking or coming off of drinking to really be in touch with your psychological state since you are purposely numbing it. I'll give Dave big kudos for posting this because it's so true- and it stuck with me over the last week. Might be paraphrasing but anyways. Don't let yourself "get to high or to low" and be aware when you start feeling like this. Keeping an even keel has helped me tremendously. Especially getting to low... be aware and do anything (besides drinking...) to change your thought process at that moment. Don't let it perpetuate and keep you down. Then you just want to numb the thoughts and your back on the roller coaster.
Keep going!
-K
Hi Jennifer,
My experience with alcohol had a strange way of creeping into my life an causing more problems than I could ever have imagined. If you binge drink "blackouts" will happen and all bets are off with self control after that. I suggest totally stopping for a while get your wits about you before something really bad happens. Assaulting a cop is just the beginning.
After stopping for a few weeks you'll be amazed how your clarity and common sense comes back. I started seeing life and my relationship with alcohol for what is really was. At least it was my experience.
-K
I know how you feel never thought I would ever stop. My motivation came from an arrest (which I barely remember) and health issues. Search inside and think hard about your motivation before "the unwanted" motivation finds you. And the unwanted motivations create more stress (and excuses) for you not to quit.
I've figured out I have an addictive personality. Which I'm sure most drinkers have... but I found you need something (anything) to interrupt the pattern/habits you've created. To break the cycle and mind set of wanting that drink. I use to do the same thing... I would obsess about having a drink(s) at the end of the day. That was my reward and I would justify it really well to myself. Hey I worked hard, had a stressful day, etc... I deserve this mental break. Then after the 2nd drink I would be like why the hell am I doing this?
Hi dook. Welcome. Sounds like you know you need to stop... you said you hate "IT" you might want to think about what it is and write down why you hate it. I think personalizing drinking and why we do it and why we don't like "it" anymore helps us see why we need to just stop and take a step back and look at what it is costing us. I think motivation is a key factor to stopping. Finding out what the motivation(s) is has helped me. I knew if i kept going i was going to be in jail, dead, divorced, broke and homeless. Or all of the above... food for thought.
Haven't had a drink in almost a month. It's weird I wake up most days check this site for some strength and inspiration. And then I tell myself "nothing is more important than me staying straight". I sometimes think to myself this is a selfish statement to say. But the reality is- if I don't stay sober it will eventually cost me everything. So I know the statement is true for me. Drinking almost always made me feel horrible, full of regret and eventually took over as a huge focus in my life.
So for today and as far as I can see into the future sobriety is the most important thing to me.
-K
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