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Diva's rainy days...

14 years ago 0 +0 / -0 910

I am sick. Enough said.

14 years ago 0 +0 / -0 910

Hello Ashley,

Thank you for your support! I am really tired but I had a better day. I managed to start a load of laundry without crying. I also took a shower, got dressed and even put on make-up. I also met with a contracter my owner sent over to get some stuff fixed in the house. Now I am exhausted and will probably head for a little nap. But I do feel better compared to yesterday. Just really really tired today.

14 years ago 0 +0 / -0 11223

We are here listening Diva.

You are not alone. Never think you are alone in this.

Stay strong and keep fighting!

Thinking about you today...

Ashley, Health Educator

Here to help :)

14 years ago 0 +0 / -0 910

I have been having a I hate myself, I fail at life, I am exhausted kinda two days. Will try and get back on track tomorrow. Feeling angry and sad and anxious and overwhelemd and tired and plain exhausted! I am even angry at my husband and I don't know why. I just am. I go from wanting to bite the heads off of nails with my teeth to sitting on the floor crying. Fun times... I just want to scream...

Tomorrow is another day. This too shall pass!

14 years ago 0 +0 / -0 910

Hey Goofy,

Sorry I was catching with the sleep thing lol

I slept all day today. Now I can't sleep. But I will soon enough lol. I am impressed I have actually been up for 7 hours without even being close to nodding off. Of course I am tired and exhausted but not falling asleep all ovee the place. So good day (more like night lol) for me.But I intend to talk about my recurring bouts of hypersomnia with my therapist this week.

As for my nieces: Thank you thank you thank you for understanding what I meant. It is nice not to feel alone for those kinds of feelings. Not that I like that you feel that way... Anyway, I am sure you know what I mean. Oh and I did take a break after the babysitting. I slept all evening sunday. Then most of the night. Then most of the day monday... No wonder I am up at this hour lol

Today, my GERD is acting up. I am itchy ( I often am, I have sensitive skin...) as well. My husband is sick poor him. My house is a mess. But besides that, I am doing ok. Thanks for letting me vent!

14 years ago 0 +0 / -0 1044

Diva, I don't know what the heck is going on with the sleep thing - it's catchy. I'm exhausted during the day; make myself stay awake; then don't sleep at night. Or if I let myself take a nap; don't sleep at night. Can't win for losing.

I know what you mean about the nieces. My grandbaby is the same way. Love her, love it when she comes and sometimes I go there, love to spend time with her; ready for her to go home. Kids wear ya down and if you need time to take a break - it's not available. Remember, it's temporary. Your brother will be returning and you can go home. I don't know about you but I don't sleep as well if not at home and even if home and with my granddaughter here I don't sleep as well.

You might expect to be exhausted considering the circumstances and don't let it get you down the next couple of days. You've been busy!

Hang in there and give yourself a break after the babysitting!!! (I hope you don't need it, but better to expect it than not need it, than let it get you down (my opinion).

14 years ago 0 +0 / -0 910

HEllo Goofy,

Thanks for your support and for your reflecting on this matter with me! I find myself dealing with hypersomnia a lot with this depression. I am exhausted most of the time if not I am sleeping whether I want to or not... I easily sleep 14-16 hours a day.

I am TIRED! I am not sure what to do about this...

Anyway, I have been up babysitting and am now exhausted beyond belief. And I know my nieces will be up early...

I love my nieces but I could cry... They are great kids! But just the attention they want from me is exhausting. It makes me happy to hang out with them. But it makes me aware of how tired I feel. On top of it I am babysitting at their ouse and my husband is at our house, so I don`t have as much help... Plus, I am used that if I feel like crap I stay at home in my little coccoon where I feel safe. Instead I am in another persons home and I feel lost.

Well I should be off. whether I am ready or not morning will come soon enough!

14 years ago 0 +0 / -0 1044

Diva, I am so glad that you are going to find out what's going on with you medically. I, too, play internet doctor sometimes, but we should always follow that up with a professional. :) Your welcome on the B12.

I think my weight issue is because I've quit exercising due to the house remodel I can't get the Wii going and the treadmill is stuck in a corner....but as you say this too shall pass. I am also not as active as I was working at landscaping job.

I too find myself tired. I can sleep all day everyday. I try to get through those (weight issue) with sugar or caffeine, so I can adhere to a rigid and I mean rigid sleep schedule. I might add that is all screwed up right now too, working on my house, called to jury duty and working back at the center - has everything a bit off kilter. I qualify this because until all this started in January, I was making myself adhere to a rigid sleep schedule and now it's all messed up. I do give myself permission to sleep when I need to sleep. I find it amazing that if I'm working on the house, working at work, or in jury duty, I do feel so compelled to sleep.

You got me on a rampage Diva. I also think dealing with depression is mentally exhausting...it messes with the neurotransmitters and melotinin which regulates the sleep/wake cycle and well, most of you know all this....so I think part of it is inherent in being dx with depression. The battle is how to control it (like blood sugar levels for a diabetic).

Okay, I've made myself stay awake today to go to bed at the right time and now I find myself past the point where I could just lay down and sleep forever. It's like a day-long battle then time for bed and here I am..... That's what's been going on with me and my sleep lately, but again I think it is because I've got too many irons in the fire. I've foregone therapy while all these other required activities are occurring, I'm not doing all the things I usually do for my depression., blah blah blah blah blah

Sorry, I'm quitting here on this one....beating a dead horse.....talking in circles.

14 years ago 0 +0 / -0 910

Hiya Goofy!

Thanks for your support! Also, thanks about you tip about the B12, I will be sure to have that checked out. As for the GERD, I really think I do have it. I read up on it and I have all the symptoms. So I will go to the doctors. I actually managed to get an appoinment! Okay, so it's in May but at least it is an appointment. And I didn't even have to fight with anyone to get it lol. So I am pretty happy about that.

As for the lseep thing, this is what I am here to vent about again lol. I promise,Goofy, if I find any answers, I will most definetely let you know! As for my weight, well bleh, it is what it is I guess... I don't know if it is the meds, the lack of exercise, if I am over eating... What do you think it is for you?

Okay, here starts the rant. I am TIRED!!! I am always tired... I am tired of being tired. I have been constantly tired for over a year. The only time I am not tired is when I am hyper. I get weird periods where I am hyper and talk fast and can't sleep and have tons of energy. And even then I feel tired and irritable, it's just that the hyper is kind of overriding it. The rest of the time I am just tired. This depressions main symptoms seem to be sleep disurbances. I have hypersomnia. I can sleep sometimes up to 19 hours in a day if I let myself. And I am TIRED! Other time I have Insomnia but I am still too tired to be effective at anything. Most days, I get so tired I just can't stay up! I am super impressed at myself when I mange to stay up all day. And I have periods thaty are worse sometimes up to 4 days where all I do is sleep. I can't help it, I just am exhausted. I calll those my coma days.

I think, for me, the worse thing is, if I wasn't so frigging exhausted all the time, this would actually be a really kind of enjoyable period of my life. I am not in school and not working. I have drawing and piano and guitar and singing and writing ahead of me which I love. I have ahusband who loves me and supports me, parents that love me, few friends but the friends I do have are great! I should be in a good place in my life. BUT I am TIRED! I am so sick and tired of being tired! I don't know when this will go away...

Anyway, sorry for ranting. I gotta go, I need a nap...

14 years ago 0 +0 / -0 1044

I am sorry to hear you may have additional health problems. I, too have GERD. Have you tried over the counter medications until you can see your doctor. Here they make some that used to be by prescription only that are over the counter. I know they helped me before I could get to see the doctor. Also, keep in mind that (I learned the hard way) long term use of anti-depressants and medications for acid-reflux + a whole host of other meds) can cause B12 to bottom out. Have them keep a check on it, here it is not routinely done.

I don't understand the sleep thing either; around mid-afternoon I feel like I'm not going to make it without a nap, but then when it's time to go to sleep; I'm rearing to go, gitty-up-go. Then I can't go to sleep. I know one problem is the side effect of my medication and I offset that iwth medications to help me sleep but they don't seem to be working to help me get there, just from those awful nightmares that don't allow me to get to the right stages of sleep. I don't know the answer - except rest when we feel the need and don't when we don't. Let me know if you figure anything out. I do the avoiding caffeine, blah blah blah stuff and it doesn't do any better.

No comment on the weight - lol, I'm right there with you. Take a depressed person add some weight and you get an overweight depressed person. What's up with that? Usually caused by medications.... Is that your issue? Just curious.

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