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A bit discouraged at the moment...


15 years ago 0 313 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Hey Miki...
 
I don't really have any advice but more something to think about.  This move has been a huge adjustment for you BUT it is huge for him also.  He has been alone living the life of a bachelor per say... not having to answer to anyone..pick up his socks etc. and all of a sudden it has all changed, and quite quickly too.  Maybe he's facing some fears of his own... afraid of change maybe.  We tend to get comfortable in our lives..happy or not and when someone changes the balance it can be a bit unsettling...  maybe time will tell the story for you guys.  You're definately making a fantastic effort...
 
I think he's lucky to have you Miki.. you took on a lot to make this work.. he must realize you think he's worth the effort.  That says a lot :)
 
DM
15 years ago 0 477 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
You guys are just really what I needed. I don't know what I'd do without you guys.
 
But here's my success! After I posted this, I got up and went to buy my text books! I was only able to find one but I still got one! And then I also went grocery shopping and got some food. Then I went to relax and swam in the pool. Then I went again to grocery shopping.. being a bit nervous, but I did it. I made dinner and we ate. Mission accomplished. I even managed to bring up personal stuff with the husband (I've been avoiding it since I'm afraid of it). It seems like I really took the light out of him, and he said nothing makes him happy anymore except baseball. What am I to do with this? I think I've made him depressed... I don't really know what to tell him. I know that the people around me kept giving me hope when I was depressed and I want to do that for him too, but it seems like I'm the one that gives him so much anger. Maybe I'll keep writing him letters. Any suggestions?
15 years ago 0 466 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Like you told me, there will be days where nothing will work and that's ok.  I gotta say, seeing you going to school and dealing with it makes me want to try harder to go back to school.  I start up in January!
 
I agree with what everyone else says, relax for the rest of the day.  Grab Mr. Bubbles and have yourself a warm bath.  After how much you've progressed so far, you deserve it!
15 years ago 0 313 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Hi Miki...
 
Don't be so hard on yourself.  You've taken on a lot over these past few weeks.. with MANY successes.  That being said moving is considered one of the 7 greatest stresses...and going back to school too!! So much going on plus you're worrying about your hubby.
 
Slow it down a notch and like CD says... get a snooze in..and unwind.  You'll get through this ....  just one day at a time.  What you don't do today...try again tomorrow. 
 
I sure hate the constant battle in my head though that happens during those times... Negative versus positive thoughts... and it's ongoing...
 
Finding something to quiet the "voices" is helpful... For me it's filling my ears with music and walking or running..and once that first hour passes with nothing but music and my bad singing... I feel like I can start again.
 
Big Hugs Miki....
 
DM
 
PS... you can always order dinner in... try some new place that you've never had being you're new in town... good excuse too!  :)
 
15 years ago 0 778 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Thats what we are here for you know that so vent away . Better than torturing yourself and your far too nice for that to happen to .
 
Miki its a bad day , i get them and nearly start freaking out that im going to that dark cold place i was in earlier this year . I felt better the next day , not perfect huff whatever that feels like !! But better and more able to manage things .
 
Have yourself a nice bath and a snooze and BE KIND to yourself or else !!
 
Huggles CD xxx
15 years ago 0 477 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Hi all, I am going up and down with my emotions all day. Although I posted a success story, I wanted to vent about my discouragements too.  I feel really dizzy today and I have migraine and sinus pressure and lumpthroat and my face feels a bit tingly. I know this is because I keep thinking about it, but today my paranoia seems a bit too high and I seem to not be able to control it. I was trying to find a new doctor since I'm in a new area but the process is taking forever and I get frightened.. I feel so insecure if I don't have a doc. I also didn't go to my classes today because I was way to anxious. I feel embarrassed about it even though I try not too. I feel like, geez Miki, it's only the 2nd day of class and you skipped it already!!! My goal was to keep at least one class... and I am juggling 3 at the moment. I need to remember that, but it's hard today. I also become afraid because I tried to drive right now but was too anxious to do so, and there is no food in the house I'm afraid what my husband will say to that. I haven't settled in yet and I'm becoming terrified of everything. I think about what if I end up not being about to get out again and I can't be responsible for even maintaining a life. On top of that with my husband. I try to snap out of it, but it's an on and off thing every second.. my minds are arguing. But I haven't given up hope. Maybe it will all pass tomorrow. I've done all that I can to this point and I'm proud of that. Maybe I need to take a nap and start over. Thanks for letting me vent.

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