I am so mazaed at you hun! It is truely a joyful thing to watch you progress! Way to go!!!
I read your post about feeling angry, the good kind of angry. I don't think it is great that you are having a tough time with your hubby but I love seeing that you are in fighting spirits! As for your last post wow and bravo!
I'm sorry about your husband with depression. And I think you are amazing that you have 5 children, many pets, a husband with depression, hurties in you sides, PAs and a scary neighbor and you are still optimistic. You really truely are my hero.
I don't think anything can bring me down no longer.. all I have is to go up and forward.
Miki if your hubby does have depression then im here for you . I have said before my hubby suffers really quite badly from depression . Its not everyday but thats only because im so damn careful in what i do or say incase it triggers him off . Just wish he did the same for me , like you do for yourself . It is sooooooooo frustrating , i mean if we can see it and blimmin well say it even why dont they put the effort in . I at times have snapped and flipped myself , cut myself away from my family because its just easier that way . Having to give excuses for your better half is tiring and embrassing and you run out of exuses . I have told them he suffers from depression but that dont matter .
I dont want the same for you , i try my hardest because of the children . Yes i do love him but sometimes dont like him very much .
My hubby dosnt do talking , have tried a zillion times and he always rakes such silly stuff up ive done in the past . Hey nothing sordid i will have you know !!! Im a good girl . If only i could get him to a marriage councellor then im sure he would at least think about things better . Do you think yours would try it ? Could you maybe ask his mum or sibling to help out ?
Yes im other side of the world , but also just the other side of your screen .
I am sorry to hear that your hubby is treating you that way. You are, however, doing great, and you are putting forth an effort to take part in his life and the activities that he enjoys, so good for you! Try to focus on the positive, and stay strong. Things will get better, and like you said, a whole new horizon is in clear view, and waiting for you.
DazedMommy, I think you are right about his depression. And he doesn't know how to handle a crisis and is finding a passage way to escape to. Thanks so much for always being there.. I do feel like I've accomplished so much and I really feel I couldn't have done it without you. This goes for Cornish Dee too. Thanks for remembering who I am... I mean, I know you would do that but yep, that tis I who went biking influenced by Minnesota.. and you are right, I am 2 hours away now from there.
Yesterday, I became angry again. But it was a great anger. He started talking about his life plans to my sister in front of me of plans I've never heard of before. I was really offended and disappointed this time. Then this morning I told him I want to go with him to watch him play his baseball game and he didn't say a single word to me and left without a goodbye. I think I've had it up to here. I realized that he has known me for 9 frikkin years and can't differenciate me from the rest of the people!? I am not just anybody... I've ALWAYS had his back and when I just slipped on a few words (not even action) he can't forgive me. It just shows me how much love was there to begin with?? Even people on the other side of the world that I've never met in person (all you lovely people) can respect my progress and respect who I am. This is just sad to me. But I feel like I stood up and I am dusting myself off now. A whole new horizon is waiting for me.
Well i totally get what you are saying about disclosing too much on here . I have a few times wrote a post deleted it only to rewrite it again because i thought why shouldnt i say it ? I for one also read the forum awhile before i posted because i could relate to so much but was just to scared to . At first i felt so anxious and nearly even sick when i did , but soon got over that lol .
As for you young lady , not so long ago you were pleased with yourself not so long ago about riding your bike around the garden if i remember right . If i have the wrong person then oops please forgive me but pretty sure it was you . Now look what you have achieved . WOW OH WOW .
Was going to say the small steps add up but thats not the case for you , youv'e gone and done gigantic huge strikes . Moving , school shopping going out you name it you are trying it . Well done youv'e brought out the proud mum in me !!!
Again Miki...kudos to you. Your ability to love and demonstration of patience in your relationship is commendable.
Like Diva though I want to echo that you need to be loved for who you are as you are. I also want to say that we are not responsible for the feelings of others. We may contribute to them but we as people have CHOICE in how we interpret, accept or don't accept other peoples actions and or words.
You made a mistake.. said some things you shouldn't of. It happens. That's life.... he has a choice and it seems he's making a poor one. Making someone you love feel the way he is making you feel is just mean. I apologize if that crosses the line as in no way do I mean too. You have shown nothing but good faith in trying to redeem yourself in his eyes...and thus far it hasn't changed a darn thing.. Which is his loss.
That being said it does sound as though he is battling depression. If that is the case maybe he doesn't yet know it... denial.. looking for reasons for how he feels and your argument just gave him a reason..someone to blame. I don't know - just blabbing now.
I want you to know though that I admire all you've done in this last month. I think you're amazing!! and have shown tremendous growth since I first started reading your posts. You can do anything Miki... fear or no fear you're a fighter. Time will tell what your marriage holds but you keep getting out there and LIVING as life waits for noone. You gotta grab it and enjoy it...
Hi Diva, I LOVE every single word you write for me so please keep sending me your novels! Hahah.
And Joe and Breanne, you guys are right. I do feel like it's an accomplishment and rewarding for putting myself out there, since many people may be benefitting from it also. Plus, by doing so, I was able to have all you great people in my life. I really think this is such a great community. Birdie, thanks so much for the encouragement also. I appreciate how you shared with me all your past similar experiences too. I'm back visiting my family... it's so nice to be home. I'm feeling motivated every minute in exploring this crazy thing called life. I will update you soon when anything new comes up.
Just wanted to drop in and say that you are doing great! Shopping, school, being back together with hubby, that is huge stuff and I'm really proud of all your effort! You are getting some great thoughts here from others! I hope you stay encouraged and don't be to hard on yourself!
It’s been a while since you were active on this site. Please extend your session below
You have been logged out due to inactivity.
Please sign back in.
We use cookies to help us learn about how our platform is used and how we can improve your experience. To
learn more please see our Privacy Policy and Terms of Use.
.
