whoosh, the low has come back big time.
Why why why.
I am taking my meds.
Last night I watched the hours go by and just couldnt sleep.5 am and I was still clock watching.
This morning I got up and my husband made me some tea and i just started crying, shouting.
I was angry that I felt like this.
Angry that although we had the big family talk and all were going to be supportive it seems to me in my irrational thoughts, that its all talk no action.
What has happened to their active presence to help me with pleasant activities?
i have been trudging through this misery as always alone.
I know it is me that needs to do the work to get well but why do they promise to help then do nothing.
It just makes me feel let down and worse than before.
They were going to learn about my illness.
Have they bothered to? Far to busy for that.
I feel let down and hurt. I know the 'meeting was only a week ago and I should give them a chance but i am struggling day by day.
My luxury is not wow lets do something nice next month.
Next month might as well be next year. i know I am being unrealistic, but cant help/stop these thoughts.
Nobody cares, thats how I feel.
They just want me to pop back to normal.
Its not a cold. I cant get over this in a couple of days.
My guess is that as they spoke to me on my good day they think I am over it.
what is happening, why am I so angry, i feel agitated, tired, exhausted by all of this. Its just too big a struggle to keep going.
