Wooohooooo SP. Way to go. Yea, it's true, bosses are human after all and make mistakes just like everyone else. You sound a lot more positive. I am so happy for you.
I am staying at my current job as I asserted myself on Thursday when I worked and I accepted an extra shift yesterday morning. I was working directly with my boss and it went exceptionally well. She made mistakes which humanized her. I took her off the pedestal so to speak. I also realized that maybe I am actually good at my job.
I have also decided to volunteer so I can gain some admin skills so I can transition out of my current job into non-profit work. I do know that I cannot physically do my current position for another 10 years. It's just so hard on my body.
So with everyone's reality checks here I am moving forward. Thanks!
I think ~m is right about how the grass looks greener from the other side.
At some level, you're aware of your skewed view, which we all share, since you stated your "problems" would travel with you if you moved.
I suppose our challenge is to make the most of the problems, as Davit has taken lemons and made lemon aid(gee - how would the analogy be for apples, apple pie, apple sauce).
This has been a really interesting thread... and so helpful to read. Thanks Davit and Sunny for offering such wisdom... as always :)
SP and Hugs... your honesty and openness has been refreshing. I am sorry you both suffer as you do. Nevertheless, It seems like you are both making progress and I congratulate you on the work you are doing and thank you for the inspiration you provide for the rest of us.
SP... I just had to chuckle at your library comment. I worked in a university library before my breakdown, my dh works in a public library (he has difficulty dealing with the homeless who use the stacks as a toilet and study areas as bedrooms... then there are the demanding wealthy who act as if they are gods and he is their tax-payer servant... don't get me started on co-workers and bosses!. Ha.) My sister just changed jobs from librarian to private researcher because the library pay is low and the hours awful.
There is a reason for the saying about grass always being greener on the other side.
I don't want to sound critical since I know what you are going through but I want to point out that there is a lack of assertiveness and positivity in your post. A lack of decisiveness. So yes changing job or location is not going to cure anything. It might help a bit but mostly I think right now with how you feel it would be disapointing.
Lack of decisiveness can make even the best job look bad or be hard to do. Have you looked at the reasons you think this job is a mistake rather than the wrong choice at present.
I am 35 and I am fairly content. Sometimes I feel like running though, when times are tough, I want to move away and start fresh with my family in another province but I am now realizing that my problems will still be there. I am learning how to be happy with what I have, and I am very happy but I feel so tired of the panic and anxiety. I especially have work issues.
I have lost my trust in myself so I am not even sure I like the career I have chosen. I find it so hard to go to this particular job. I have to work with the big boss tomorrow and I am so afraid. I am always afraid of making mistakes, and my job is a high stress position so I am re-thinking my choices. But right now in my mind, it is just another huge mistake I made yet again.
So if I had money I would probably re-train I guess. Maybe a nice quiet job in a library.
Life doesn't wear out it only changes. As we age and get diseases like Arthritis and Diabetes life changes and some times the changes are major but it is still life and it is your life. Hardest thing is letting go of who we were. And I was some one. I was very physically active and successful till at 38 the rug was pulled out. I have been making adjustments since then. Unfortunately I let the negative get out of hand and I have spent far too much time on the pity pot. I am alive and even sitting in the garden almost too tired to get up I am still alive. Just a different alive. Life is what you make of it. Negative or positive and change can be a good thing. I deserve to putter in my garden, I have put in my time now it is time to relax a bit.
I just spent seven hours with a friend pressing apples for juice. She did almost all of the picking and a good bit of the grinding and pressing but it is my press and my trees so even though I get tired and sore it is still a good feeling to be able to still do my part. I feel good, Apples for juice, apples for pie, apples for jelly. Life is good because I want it to be. I'll admit I miss my healthy body but I'm 60 and sick, time to slow down and smell the flowers. I never did that in the good old days when I was still working.
Trying to avoid burnout was difficult. I noticed others acting strangely in the past, and couldn't tell what was eating them, until it started to affect me, and I had to make major changes in my life.
There's not much "left" of my life, but I found I was better when I was in a "relationship", a job and my parent was better.
Unfortunately, there aren't "switches" I can trip to just make these things happen again. I meditate daily after unwinding in the garden, where I try to find my humility and meagre nourishment.
The garden seems to be the most generous source of giving I can find, present company excluded...
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