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Fear of Mental Illness


17 years ago 0 12 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Great advice, isabella.
17 years ago 0 207 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Maggie, I can assure you that you are not, i repeat, you are NOT going crazy. I had the same fear for several months, that I was going crazy because I felt like I was walking around in a haze and that reality wasn't really reality. I was having major depersonalization too because when I looked in the mirror it didn't seem like I was looking at myself. Talk about scary and really thinking I was going crazy!! But the reality of it is that this is what anxiety and panic is all about. The feelings of impending doom, the depersonalization and derealization, it is the anxiety. I think alot of it is due to hyperventilation and improper breathing as well as the chemicals that are released during panic attacks and during times of stress. Our anxious thoughts only make things worse too. I would be sitting outside on my porch looking at the sun setting and feel as though I was separated from reality and then I would start thinking that something has to be wrong and that this isn't right so I would go inside only to find that the "haziness" followed me everywhere. It really scared me and seemed to last months and months. I finally told myself that I was fine and that maybe that was reality and I just forgot what it was like. Sounds stupid, i know, but once I did this and focused on my breathing it became sooo much better. Now I only get it during times of hyperventilation, when I am nervous and my breathing becomes rapid and shallow without me even noticing it. It actually happened today in class. I got there only to find out that my friend, my safe person, was running late and might not make it. I suddenly felt dizzy and lightheaded while I was taking notes. Then the haziness set in and that is when I realized that my breathing was off. I did my exercises, told myself I was fine and that it was just anxiety, and focused on the lecture and it eventually went away. I got through it and so will you. You HAVE to recognize that you are fine, nothing is wrong, and that the doom you feel and everything that comes along with it is just anxiety. You can do it and will do it, it just takes time and patience. Also, lack of sleep, the flu, an imbalanced diet, etc. can also take its toll and make things worse. I have faith that you will pull out of this and i
17 years ago 0 34 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Yeah Maggie I know exactly what your talking about with that feeling of doom. Im sure all of us who suffer from an anxiety disorder do, dont worry. Take care :)
17 years ago 0 112 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Hmmm well what can I say? I really need to post right now. I caught the flu which only makes me feel more brain-fogged, and many of us are afraid of those feelings I am sure. I have been waking up with awful dooming feelings for the past few days, for the most part I eventually move past this feeling. Today, I woke up and felt some doom and still sick, I decided to get out of bed before the ruminating began. I figured I would try and keep a bit busy until the feelings passed, especially because they have been passing towards the night-time lately. Today was harder and a bit different though. I started feeling really bewildered and scared. For ex, like when I would look at the time, it didn't feel like that was the actual time. Sounds weird, huh? I kept having this feeling like I was being sucked into a big black dooming hole, and floating about within the universe. I knew I was at home and okay in the end, but the feelings of terror wouldn't stop. I just kept feeling such impending doom for hours and eventually I broke down and panicked. I don't know how to recognize all of this stuff as just anxiety and panic, when I feel my sense of reality is being messed with a bit. It's like I know everything is fine, but it doesn't feel fine. I recognize everything is how as it should be, but then why am I so afraid? Then I begin looking around and thinking I am getting freaked out by everything. I am so afraid of losing my mind, and I can't seem to stop those anxious thoughts- especially since my feelings (doom) seem to be telling me I am. Does anyone ever feel like everything is okay but not at all? Maybe like they become extremely hyper-vigilant or tentative about their reality and everything around them? Which as a result makes you feel like you are losing it even more? I realize my fears are irrational and don't even really make any sense, but I have just been feeling so uncomfortable with myself lately, like I don't know where my day is. Sometimes I just feel like I am stuck in one long panic-ridden dooming day that has no end, and no sleep. Just: fear, fear, fear. I posted here because I am guessing if anyone else ever feels scared about such things, it would most likely be those who are/have been afraid of going crazy. My boyfriend tells me that
17 years ago 0 23 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Maggie, thanks for taking the time to type all that!! I can guarantee most of us feel the same way. Some days are good but we tend to focus only on the bad ones.
17 years ago 0 112 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Hi, I just wanted to say that it's true- many of us have been down this road. I have the same immense fear, but about being bipolar. I have looked back on past events and nearly convinced myself that certain things I have done or said in the past can better be explained by a bipolar disorder. I have made myself sick from the stress about this. I have felt incredible amounts of doom, panic, depression because of this. I have literally thrown myself into full blown panic attacks even at home (without realizing it at the time), which only made me feel even more 'out of control' and frightened, convincing myself furthermore that I am absolutely losing my mind and will land up alone in an asylum forever. This is my biggest fear, so I don't even notice I am having multiple panic attacks in the midst of all my worries either. I am far too focused on what is going to happen to me, where am I going to land up, how I will loose my entire life, etc... I could write about this one issue for hours, as I have struggled (and am still struggling with it) very often. Instead, let me just tell you that everything will be alright. It has to be. We will all make our peace with our fears eventually, nothing lasts forever- not even panic! Stay strong within yourself, and don't give into the obssessive and anxious thoughts. It's the worst possible thing for you, do not empower your automatic negative thoughs and fears. Also, let me just add that I used to be horrified about every physical symptom and it's potential diseases in the 1'st year of my Panic disorder, despite what anyone told me, I was right- they were wrong. I was very worried for myself. As it turns out, nothing was physically wrong with me, it took many, many, tests and doctors for me to finally begin trusting and believing I was okay. Now here I am worrying I may have a mental illness; making myself sick for days at a time with worry. Then it occurs to me once in a while, what if this is the same thing as when I was worried about my physical self, except now I am obssessing about my mental health? It's hard to really wrap your mind around this thought and just trust, as 'what if' thoughts enter your mind. But I just think about all the time I have wasted worrying about my physical self back then, and how
17 years ago 0 77 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
This is such a common fear for us panic attack / anxiety sufferers. At my worst I couldn't decide if I was schizophrenic or suffered from manic depression ! I think panic plays on our worst fears. My mother was schizophrenic, and had such a tough life ( this was many years ago tho' huge advances have been made I know ), that that was the last thing I ever wanted to suffer from. In 2006 there is still stigma about mental illness ( stupidly ), and I just was so frightened that I would be like my mum, although when she was well, she was the loveliest lady. And manic depression, no thanks. Whatever your biggest fears are, your panic will take you there. But, panic attacks/ social anxiety is not a form of any metal illness that I know of, and doesn't precipitate one either, honestly. If you look at all the web sites for the various mental health issues, lots of the symtoms overlap, and you can make yourself believe you're suffering from any, or even all of them. I really believe we all have a little OCD in us, most of us believe we've heard a voice at some time. It was a revelation to me when I shared my worries with my very sensible daughter, and she said, but mum everyone feels that, or thinks that sometimes ! We just attribute everything to our panic, does that make sense to you ? Be kind to yourself, and believe it, you're not going mad, don't have schizophrenia ( its more than just hearing voices believe me !), you have a panic disorderthat with the help and support of this site, you can defeat !! Good luck
17 years ago 0 34 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Hi Jane I really understand your fear Jane. I myself have worried about schizophrenia, thinking do I have it? Will I get it? Its horrible I know. I still worry about it, but I have found a lot of ways to decrease my anxiety about thoughts like that. So Im just writing this in hopes of releiveing some of your anxiety about what your worried about right now. Try thinking about what it would mean to actually have schizophrenia, the world would not come to an end if you did somehow get it, probably very unlikely, but if you did it would'nt be as big of a deal as what your making it out to be. You would think differently from other people and thats all and have a very good chance for recovery. I hope this helps :)hang in there you will beat this. If you need to talk about this sometime with someone feel free to talk with me.
17 years ago 0 12 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Wow, thank you all for your reassuring thoughts. Just reading them makes me feel a lot better and much less anxious. I suppose that's a good start to beating this anxiety for good. :)
17 years ago 0 2 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Hi, Jane! I totally understand your fear of becoming schizophrenic! The going crazy thoughts are the worst part of panic attacks for me, and I just realized recently that it's in part because my husband was schizophrenic and I fear that will happen to me. But what Brndan said was true with my husband. He was totally clueless about it, but all of us arond him were very aware. If those around you aren't concerned, that's a good sign. I also have to remind myself that even if it were true and I am going crazy, there's plenty of help for that! My husband went through some tough times, but once he was on medication he lived a very normal and happy life. He went to work every day, had normal relationships, and had an incredible amount of personal growth because of it. And that was back in the 80's. I know that since then more is known about the disease and there is even better treatment which gives me hope for anyone diagnosed with it.

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