Get the Support You Need

Learn from thousands of users who have made their way through our courses. Need help getting started? Watch this short video.

today's top discussions:

logo

11 years and counting

Timbo637

2024-10-31 6:49 AM

Quit Smoking Community

logo

Feels like hell week all over!!

Timbo637

2024-10-30 9:38 AM

Quit Smoking Community

logo

Roller Coaster Withdrawal

Timbo637

2024-10-14 12:28 PM

Quit Smoking Community

logo

Smile....and don't shoot the messenger

Timbo637

2024-09-27 3:17 PM

Quit Smoking Community

This Month’s Leaders:

Most Supportive

Most Loved

Browse through 411.768 posts in 47.066 threads.

161,299 Members

Please welcome our newest members: Snootz, Poul Ilsøe, Trina J Kriya, SG1501, Clam123

People getting upset at you for having panic disorder


21 years ago 0 33 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
I apologize if I have offended anyone. I realize I do not know everything or much at for that matter.
21 years ago 0 1062 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Hi, Kingsford. I understand that you don't suffer from panic attacks, but that your boyfriend does. Those who do not have this condition may be tempted to give advice or to think "why can't they just snap out of it?" However it doesn't work that way. This is a real condition, and though the individual would love to be free from this, it cannot be mandated from another person, as much as we would love for everybody to be well. The best thing a panic sufferer can get from a non-sufferer is support, devoid of criticism and judgment. This will make a person feel safer and more confident in the company of those who do not judge or give advice. I applaud you for coming to the site and for reading up on it. As you can see from the posts in the forums, there is a lot for the non-sufferer to learn about this condition. -- Anne-Marie, Site Administrator
21 years ago 0 9 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
hi violet I know what your on about, at first my husband didn't understand but now he does. I used to feel as if i was the only person in the world who was like this, but now there seems there's loads of us. I hope you have enough strength to deal with this situation,,, i give you loads of hugs jackie
21 years ago 0 33 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
WAIT A MINUTE! This is coming from a girl that doesn't have panic attacks, my boyfried does. No offense guys but most males are dorks when it comes to dealing with emotions beyond their control or understanding. I was extremely shocked the other night when my boyfriend had an attack. The past couple months have been really hard dealing with his depression. On several instances I thought I didn't need to be dealing with this poopoo head- WHAT ABOUT ME!!!!!! wAAAAA. I've stuck it out and have a new hope in finding out that he conditions are not self absorbed. I realize panic attacks are overwhelming but I would hope you can understand that those of us that do not experience do not always understand why you just can'nt get over it. I used to think we all had our ups and downs, now in having two manic friends and an unprescribed boyfriend, I feel greatful for not having simular uncontrolably tendancies. Good luck with your relationship, some people need a little more information in order to understand how to be a positive part of your life.
21 years ago 0 8 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Dear Violet, Boy oh Boy, I think alot of us can relate, I was married one year to someone who knew of my "illness" and needs to be supportive - you know "in sickness and in health" well, he became abusive after we married, pretaining to my illness names such as: basketcase, retard at large, uselsess, retard, - those are the more "gentler" names, well I had to get out - before I lost my self worth, he wasn't helping me to get better, I went to abuse group after that, and anxiety board, and now panic board, yes I do alot more in summer, but winter I may as well be a "bear" hibernate. Those comments "these guys" make aren't going to help us feel better about ourselves, see a dr., get support, get on proper medication and try to get him to read up on your "illness" - I posted this, but I will tell you: should you find yourself the victim of other people's bitterness, ignorance, smallness, or insecurities, remember things could be worse YOU could be one of THEM. Your panic probably also came on stronger by the "change" - change will cause it, and your move did it. You asked if anyone experienced this, so as you see I did, even to boyfriends I find now, they don't stick around, so not for me "healthy" wise, anyway, my ex, went to a theatre with me, too and I got phobic in the middle crowded, asked if we could move to end seat, when I thought he cared and said "you ok" when I said that he said "that's why I hate going anywhere with you, always something"! That "hurt" I didn't know he felt that, sad thing is - they know it going in. Good Luck and your not alone - remember "it is better to be alone and healthy, then in an "unhealthy" relationship and lonely". Lonely Rene
21 years ago 0 198 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Dear Violet Girl, I must agree with Marianne! I feel a person that loves you, cares for you or is even just your friend has the responsibility to at least try and understand your obviously heart wrenching situation. Put the shoe on the other foot - if it were 'you' dealing with someone you cared for, would you stick with them, try and understand and, help them get through it? If they are too shallow to grasp that your situation in very painful and confusing to you - you don't need them!! You don't need to be beat up emotionally by someone who doesn't 'get it'. You may be the type of girl who can't imagine being without a guy - but, if you get yourself better by researching your condition, seeing a good doctor, etc - then, you will be proud of yourself, have your condition under control and find someone who has the intelligence and compassion to be with you. You have to think you deserve someone like that. Bye for now, Maria
21 years ago 0 90 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Hi VioletGirl, Ok, I'm sorry, I know we're supposed to be supportive here and stear clear of personal advice and interpretation, but what the heck, I just have to write this: LOSE THE GUY!!! He told you to your face that he thinks you're not fun, that he's sick of wasting his time with you, he's not prepared to show the least bit of understanding even when you tried to explain, he hates the way you are and makes you feel bad about it, instead of helping you through it. Jeeeeeez, do you really want to marry this guy??? Don't be scared, there are loads of people out there who can help you through a panic attack even if you're on your own. Marianne
21 years ago 0 1062 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Hi VioletGirl and Biz. Your posts refelct that no doubt you are feeling miserable about this. There is hope though, and people can help themselves through this. You have to be willing to gain control back and to help yourselves. I urge you to sign up for the Panic Program and to work through it. It really works. -- Anne-Marie, Site Administrator
21 years ago 0 1 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
I completely know how you feel and it is interesting because it happened today. My boyfriend and I started dating and I started having attacks a month later and for over 2 years now he has been struggling to be supportive and understand. We got into it today because I am always like "here just take my car and drive yourself" or I don't go places because I am afraid I will panic ... we haven't gone to the movies or out to eat and a long time and it is bothering me that he doesn't even ask anymore. He is at the assumption point that it doesn't matter anyway because I will say no. I really understand that it is really hard for him being on the outside and just seeing me struggle and not understanding it for himself either. I feel like a freak the majority of the time already because of it and it is hard when other people think it is all in my head because I know I can't control it. I am in your same shoes!
21 years ago 0 1 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Hi everyone. I'm new here. I dont know anyone with panic attacks, so i thought perhaps someone on here could share some stories or advice on what im going through. I have had panic attacks on and off for about 8 years. I was at one point home schooled due to being diagnosed agoraphobic. I met my now fiance 5 years ago and he met me while i was in partial remission. 2 weeks after we moved in together I started having panic attacks and its been hell ever since. He says im miserable all the time and no fun anymore. I have tried to get him to read books on what i experience but he thinks its just all in my head and to get over it. He's sick of wasting his time on someone that cant do much but work. I cant even go to the movies with him without hyperventilating or having to go outside and sit with the manager until the movie ends. He hates this and makes me feel so bad for something i really dont think i can control. Has anyone else experienced this before? How did you handle it?

Reading this thread: