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Freaking out


13 years ago 0 6252 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Welcome maggierose83.

In CBT jargon that is called distracting, taking your mind off what bothers you. It is a coping skill. You can use it anywhere. Some times in a restaurant a person will look OCD but what they are doing is using coping skills.

Here for you
Davit.    (I love to change things around when I can)
13 years ago 0 14 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Sometimes I find that changing little things first can help, kind of feel like if the mood feels different the day can be different. Seems hard for me to get out of the ruts if I keep everything exactly the same. Sometimes just changing where I sleep, the lighting of the room or rearranging a room makes me feel like things that are different can be comforting.
13 years ago 0 4027 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Guy had
If we only had the conviction that Tiger Woods' wife had with that golf club, we would be cured(and financially settled for a lifetime, endorsementts pending).
 
Twingma & Sunny were inspring, back a few posts, and they aren't glossed over.
13 years ago 0 89 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Canadian Guy is cleaning a room every two days...no wonder I feel wired!
 
Don't let that set some sort of standard or something...I'm just deep, deep, cleaning each room to get ready to try to sell the house. I'm also purging possessions very seriously. The less we have to move, the cheaper the movers will be.
 
I am so exhausted. So tired. But just like someone else said here: I just have to get through this vacuuming, then just cleaning the rug, etc. Same thing at work. I just have to get through this one sheet of paperwork right now. I just have to deal with this one problem.
 
I hope to spend more time here this weekend. 
 
Keep swinging. You only lose the fight when you stop swinging.
13 years ago 0 27 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
It's hard to add to what Sunny said, back several posts.  I can just share this experience with you - panic interrupted my education after my second year of undergrad.  It took me SIXTEEN YEARS to earn that degree.  I was so proud when I graduated that I painted "16 Yr Plan" on my graduation hat and walked proudly up to receive my diploma.  Since then, I have been accepted to and completed two masters degree programs.  After completing the second one, the only job I could get required me to move out of state.  With a two-year-old and an unemployed husband.  I was scared to death.  But through ALL of these experiences, I kept thinking, I don't need to finish my degree today.  I just have to finish today.  And if today was too much, I would tell myself, I just need to get through this class.  And if the class was too much, I'd think I just need to get through this minute.  I can get through a minute.  And those minutes add up... so here I am, with a new job and two masters degrees and most of my panic behind me.  It can be done!!!
 
Like Dory says in Finding Nemo... Just keep swimming, just keep swimming...
 
:) Laura
 
PS - CONGRATULATIONS!
13 years ago 0 376 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
If I may add my 2 cents....

Being on these forums is no escape.  It is hard work.  Hard to read, hard to feel, hard to be called on my avoidances and misconceptions, hard to be "seen and heard"... scary... very scary.   Coming here is no escape for me... at all.  Despite that, it is worth it for the moments of insight.... the moments of someone understanding exactly what I'm going through, the clarity that is shared here... getting to be privy to other ppls honesty, strength, courage and vulnerabilities.  No, it's work.  A lot of work.... but so very worth it.  What a privilege to watch ppl struggle and question and grow and change.  Exhausting sometimes.  No, I would not call being here an escape.... nope.  (from someone else who has lived a lot .. )
13 years ago 0 6252 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Justducky.

You mentioned that being on the forum was causing you anxiety, it does it to a lot of people, in fact people have said it took a lot of work for them to brave the anxiety and come here. We lose some when it becomes too much for them. Not coming is escaping the tension it gives you. I would hope coming and posting, even all day, is benefiting you and giving you coping skills not just an escape. Have you noticed any lessening of anxiety. That is what posting and venting are supposed to do. If reading other peoples pain bothers you, it is an excellent way to build coping skills, by doing it and being able to say, I did it is exposure. It is supposed to help you deal with your own anxiety. Of course if you are naturally empathetic it is going to cause you some pain. Coping or escaping, I'd like you to stay with us. I do know what works but it may not be right for everyone. Basically it boils down to changing negative to positive but there are a lot of different ways to do this for a lot of different people. Basically the common things are relaxation and coping skills, using distractions, and dealing with core beliefs. There are variations on every thing else. 

I'm still learning and adding to my knowledge base and some of the stuff I've learned scared the c..p out of me reading it. 

Sorry if I put you on the defensive, it was not intended. But I did want you to think on this which you have done. The hard thing about curing anxiety and panic is that it is not some one doing this to us, (other than indirectly) but ourselves, so we can blind side our selves without even noticing it. It is like an elastic, if you don't stretch it till it breaks it will just snap you back to where you were. And some times that happens, some times you have to try again a few times till it fits. Did you notice that for every negative what if there is one or more positive ones.

Don't worry about offending me, it is pretty hard to do. 

Try to let a lot of what makes you anxious flow off you like, well you know, water off a ducks back.

Here for you,
Davit
13 years ago 0 66 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
oooh, one more thing, what did you mean by not coming to this forum as a form of escapism.  I didn't understand that.  How is not coming escaping.  I thought being on this forum all day is kind of an escape ??
13 years ago 0 66 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
I love the what ifs... i could add many to them.  Thank you.  I hope I didn't offend you in some way, I got a bit of a defensive feel to your comments.  Maybe my misinterpretation.  I do appreciate your feedback.  Like you said, you know what works.  I respect advice from people that have been there and lived alot.
 
ducky
13 years ago 0 6252 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Ducky.

Some what ifs to play with. What if this is not you. What if this is just a core belief dictating your life. What if this is not  how you are meant to be. What if doing more things for yourself worked as a distraction. What if you found you liked it. What if in your spare time you helped out at home to get the feel of it. What if I'm right, I'm 60, I've been there. What if not  coming to forums is a form of escapism. (I know I'm not supposed to say things like that) A note here: when I get too Hyperaware, I go do dishes or work in my shop. (I have to do my own dishes) What if you just do the program. What if you quit worrying so much. I bet you can come up with lots of what ifs to add to this list.

Here for you,
David

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