I love you Hugs and Sunny and I appreciate you both so much! Hugs, your P.S. made me cry happy tears and thanks for the cake icon. Re: foil...as long as I don't say "foiled again", I'll be okay :) Sunny, thanks for your supportive words. When I first started this thread, I was so embarrassed. I'm frustrated with my situation and I'm sure my friends and family are frustrated with me and my fear, indecision, and playing a broken record of my woes. The problem never gets solved, that's why every so often it rears it's ugly head again. And, it won't change until I change, either my situation or my perspective. I have a lot of issues with self esteem and fear of not being able to take care of myself and was raised by Italians who raise their children to be overly dependent on people. Side note: George went to Japan Express for me and brought home a lunch of chicken terriyaki, edamame, a maki roll and fried dumplings with soy sauce. After lunch, George and I went to the book store together. We agreed not to argue and to be peaceful with each other. We know where we stand. I bought two self help books. Sometimes I wish I never took the college Psychology class, because I learned how to analyze things and I was much happier when I was ignorant. And, I wish I could be free of self help books, and just think I'm okay as I am. I don't know anyone else who puts so much effort into trying to constantly improve themselves, with the exception of this support group who works hard at overcoming panic and anxiety, agoraphobia, and other fears. Back to the books, I remembered what Hugs said on the Quote for the Day thread about being stuck, so I bought a book, called, "Getting Unstuck", by Karen Casey. Then in the co-dependency/addiction section, I bought a book called, "Language of Letting Go", by Melody Beattie. I thought it may help me with not being so attached to my daughter, although George and my parents think it's natural for me to feel that way. I also have big trust issues, I think that's why it's hard for me to trust God sometimes, because I only have people to compare Him too which is wrong, I know. Bottom line is I don't trust myself and my abilities, whether it be decision making, or being able to take care of myself. I've never been financially independent and it scares me. I didn't realize I had all of this to get off my chest, but thanks for listening. I'm glad I have you all as friends or I would be unable to make it through the rough patches in life.
Shari