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How can I go back to being "normal"?


13 years ago 0 1665 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Yippee!  I just put my flowering crabapple tree pic up to remind me that it's just around the corner.  Still a couple of months to go.....Sunny
13 years ago 0 659 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Hi Sunny:  I like your pics too..
It sure does looks like springs is on it way here in California.. It was lovely walking there the last two days...All the rabbits, squirrels, and waterfowl are pairing off and very lively..So spring must be coming..
 
Red
13 years ago 0 1665 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Hi:  I like your advice Red.  (and your pics, is spring really finally coming?) 
 
Sunny
13 years ago 0 1665 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Hi Spartan:  You were a heroine when you helped the animals!  You stepped in there and did your best until the panic attacks came back and made it difficult to be there.  I understand now what happened.  Thanks for explaining and enlightening me.
 
Your friend, Sunny
13 years ago 0 659 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Spartan,
Welcome Back,
I can understand how this could happen..With the anxiety/panic coming back and all..I have been taking some classes for a while now and I get anxiety about leaving the house and going to class even thought I have been the class for a while now..
Once I get there it and settle in it lessens in severity..I sometimes have to leave class and go out and take a short break..Excuse myself to use the restroom or get my water out of the car...These little breaks seem to help me when I am feeling a little overwhelmed by it all and I am able to go back in and finish the rest of the class..I wonder if trying this would help you when you go back to work...
 
Red
13 years ago 0 49 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Sunny,
 
It appears I worded that phrase "the novelty wore off" terribly wrong. What I was trying to convey was the initial excitement wore off, not the novelty. At first, the excitement of being around animals all the time who needed some serious love and care was enough to keep my panic completely at bay; I felt healed or normal because I was able to give them the love, care and attention that they so desperately needed. The need to help animals will always be in my heart, it's something I've felt since I was a little kid and still do to this day. When I was volunteering I did it for the animals, I tend not to think about "what's in it for me"; I personally think that might not be the best way to go about doing things. I was just thrilled to volunteer at the animal hospital because it was a chance for me to do something I love: take care of animals. And I wouldn't normally get a chance to do that because I never went to school for Animal Health Technology or Veterinary studies so I jumped at the chance to be a volunteer. I'd have to say it was very satisfying for me to do that volunteer job because I got to do something truly meaningful, as in it wasn't just benefiting me. The only reason I stopped volunteering was because the panic attacks got to be too much for me to handle. I don't think I explained myself very well earlier, hope this new post helps clarify what I meant :)
 
Spartan :)
13 years ago 0 1665 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Hi Spartan:  I love animals too, glad you could help them.  The thing is you wrote "the novelty wore off", seems to me the need to help these animals does not wear off, they always need help.  Were you doing this for you, or for them?  Can it not be a combination of both?  Think about what you are able to give them, rather than just what they give you and that way maybe you can commit to a longer volunteer time.  A lot of people won't do anything because they ask "WIFM".  That is "what's in it for me"?  rather than asking, what can I do to help this world and feel fulfulled at the same time.  Do you understand what I mean?  It gets us out of ourselves too.  The world doesn't revolve only around us, it's a lot bigger out there.  Just a suggestion,
 
Your friend, Sunny
13 years ago 0 49 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
sunny II -
 
Glad you were able to go back to work after two months off, and now you're one of the top performers in your region. That's seriously awesome! 
 
 I have been off work since mid-September 2010, and I won't be going back to work until May or June of this year. I really want to get out and work and do something, I day dream about it a lot. However, when I really think about actually getting a job it's quite panic inducing. I just focus on the negative things about myself like weakness, fear, lack of desire to do things. I'm afraid of failure, the most. In October of 2010 I volunteered at a Veterinary Hospital to keep myself busy while I really focused on getting over my anxiety. Animals are the one thing that I truly love and they fully consume my time and energy when I'm with them, I get lost in their presence. However after the first two weeks of volunteering, the novelty and excitement had worn off and I was right back to experiencing terrible panic attacks. So I'm afraid that when I go back and get an actual job (not just volunteering) that I might experience the same thing; first few weeks will be great and exciting and then I'll be back to having panic attacks and losing the job...again. 
 
Thanks again :)
Spartan 
13 years ago 0 58 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
spartan, the first day back at work is the hardest day. i was only off of work for two months but when it came time for me to go, i was so nervous......but.....today i have been back two months, one of the top performers in my region and its as if nothing ever happened. its common to be anxious about going back but you will cherish the fact you are busy day to day and not at home dwelling.
 
Sunny II

13 years ago 0 49 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Hi everyone! Been quite a while since I've been here but I do get email notifications when people respond to threads that I'm subscribed too, and that prompted me to come back and respond.
 
It has been decided that my husband and I are not going to Churchill after all. He doesn't want to go because the hours he would have been expected to work did not appeal to him, so I'm secretly very excited that we aren't going *whew*. Right now I'm just focusing on getting ready to go back to work in May/June of this year. That in itself is a huge deal, just to go back to work in my city where I live (never mind in a town hundreds of kms away).  I'm paralyzed by fear, I'm terrified of going back to work but if I don't go back...I just don't know how we'll manage. So that's just another stress that I don't need, but...we'll figure it out.
 
Thanks again everyone,
Spartan

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