Hey,
So I'm 30, have a wonderful hubby, a 13 year old stepdaughter and two rugrats of my own, 3 and 1.
My panic attacks started when I was 21, recently enrolled in college, lost my license and subsequently my job, and so whenever I would lie down to go to sleep at night, I started getting panic attacks. I even called 911 in the middle of the night one time, convinced I was having a heart attack. It took my GP and school counsellor a few weeks to realize that I was having panic attacks (after I had an episode in class). Then, I was on and off of meds. I was always the happy one, had tons of friends, was the life of the party! That all kind of started to slow down after that. I would go off the meds because my friends and family didn't think I needed the meds, it was "all in my head". So after I met my husband 6 years ago, it became clear quickly that he was very supportive. He asked me if I had cancer or HIV would I not take meds? Of course! Then his question was why I was hesitating to medicate my anxiety. It's a disease too.. so since then I've been pretty good.
Just recently (in Nov) started a new job after being home for the past 3 years with my babies. Now, they're in daycare, adapting well, my job is OK - not my dream job, but it pays the bills. And on christmas eve my anxiety kept me in bed all day! Now my trigger is waking up in the morning - certainly no avoiding that! So now what?? I upped my meds, am now on 20mg Celexa, (was down to 10 mg every other day before this) and my doc even perscribed Clonazepam to help calm my nerves. My anxiety attacks wax and wane and stay almost all day. I'll get a few minutes of relief, and then I'll think - Oh, I'm not panicking, and then I panic... it's a vicious cycle.
I'm hoping that after 10 years there's still hope for me. I have never done CBT before, but from my recent research, I believe I should be able to get better. I also have a counsellor booked who doesn't have a whole lot of experience with CBT but she said she was willing to try - it's through an EAP, so it's free - beggars can't be choosers -eh?
So, that's me ... anyone with similar stories? Or suggestions?