This is in addition to my SAD post in November. I figured I would start a new thread.
I think SAD is getting worse. Other than my worries last week about my kidneys or whatever health problem I imagined that I had, the depression part of SAD is affecting me right now. I am trying really hard to stick my thumb in it's eye, but it's been really hard today.
I know it has to do with less sunlight and colder temperatures, but I thought this year would be different. Then we had to put our 19 year old cat to sleep 8 days ago and then I had the emergency room visit. This, I am sure, added to my depression.
The symptoms I have are a closed in feeling, memory lapses like forgetting something I just thought of (within seconds), dissociation and anxiety. The closed in depression/memory feeling seems to be the strongest.
I also know that I have been off work 9 of the last 10 days, and even though it was a vacation, it does give me more time to worry when I would really be working and keeping my mind busy. It's not like I have been sitting around doing nothing, but with more free time comes more thinking. This is other than the two serious things my wife and I have been through these past 2 weeks. It is most upsetting for my wife because she had the cat since 1991. With me a lot of the sadness was for my wife because her heart has been broken due to the loss.
I know these things can weigh on us a lot in different ways. But for those of us who already have a depression/anxiety disorder, it just gets added to what we already have.
I have made some changes to my workouts. I have been working on my abs (core) to strengthen everything. I also did a ton of cardio yesterday and also have been doing yoga again and getting better at it again. Tonight I am going to do my relaxation program that I listen to with earphones. It's Doctor Emmett Miller's Relaxation & Inspiration. I have not done the program in a very long time and am looking forward to it.
Thanks for listening, everyone, and Happy New Year,
David