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having a hard time

14 years ago 0 +0 / -0 6252

Corinna

I'm going to tell you the impression I got from your post and I would like you to correct me if I'm wrong. And then I am going to say some things that you may not like so remember that it is me saying them and don't let it keep you from posting. We want to hear from you. You are also welcome to tell me where to go, but remember that this is about you not me and I really do want to help you.

I would say by your activities that you are a young person, intelligent and fairly aggressive in all you do. (mountain biking, origami, music, all point to this.) I would also say you have a fair bit of frustration when people don't understand you, and I would say you don't suffer fools gladly. The one thing I'm not sure of is the amount of nervous energy you have to burn off and how much of it comes out as anger.

Now we come to the part you may not want to hear. You do have a good bit of anger and this is a good place to vent.

But you do need to do something about it before it turns inward and starts to consume you. (if it hasn't started to do it already.) You need t find a way to bleed it off. In the other forum " letter" it talks about saying good-by to panic by writing a letter. I think you need to do this with all the things that are making you angry. If this is not enough then find something Physical to release it.

About this brother, so he is family, so what. If he was not, how would you deal with him? You can't help that he is family. A lot of people have disputes within family and some of us have found the only way to get relief is to cut the ties completely. (you can always change your mind later) Are you hanging on only because you hate to lose?

I think your involvement in the custody case is not good for your state of mind. I would say leave it to the B/F if you can. And here is a message for him. You are not Imagining all this. What you are suffering is very very real. It is also curable so don't consider this Hypochondria, It sure as the hell is not.

Watch out for the panic attack because right now you are distracted enough to keep it at bay but it will come back as soon as you have time on your hands to think about it. You had better learn some relaxation and coping techniques for when it shows up again. (and it will).

Write the letter but carefully(You can't take back any thing once it is said). You need this for closure. Get all these things that are bothering you in the open where you can deal with them.

I don't know enough about your work situation to comment other than to say, " the boss is still the boss even when he is wrong", just a fact of life even if it is unpleasant.

I hope you have luck in finding a counsellor, good one can subtly bring out a lot of hidden triggers that you may not be aware of. They also deal with a lot of people and will have the answers. I don't always agree with mine but I know in my heart that she is right so I just suck it up and accept it. And she has always been right.

Keep posting, it's like journaling, it's good for you.

Davit.

14 years ago 0 +0 / -0 2606

Hi Cori J,

I am glad that you have decided to post and share with us what you are going through. It sounds like you have a lot of different things going on right now. Hopefully it will be therapeutic for you to get things off your chest and share them with people who support you. We are all a group of individuals who support each other here.

I would suggest that you take a look through our program; there is a wealth of knowledge on a variety of topics that would be of benefit to you. There are sections on relationships, resolving disputes to name a few.

You are always more than welcome to vent and express yourself here. We will always listen.Check back soon.

Samantha, Health Educator

14 years ago 0 +0 / -0 30

Hey everybody. I’ve just been lurking in the background for a while, getting lost in my thoughts and all the crap going on. I’ve been having a hard time dealing with a lot of stuff here. I haven’t had a panic attack in about two weeks now. Yay! But the stress seems overwhelming sometimes. My doctor is trying to find a counselor for me to talk to.

I’ve been fighting with my boss trying to get my hours back. The manager at my job decided (without ever talking to me) that I had an attitude problem, and chopped my hours in half. And since finances are a lot of my stress, this skyrocketed. I finally had to explain to them both everything that I’m dealing with, and that it’s not work I have a problem with – it’s life in general!

As well as all that crap, my bf and I have been dealing with a custody case for his son. This has been going on for over a year now, and it’s been really stressful and it hurts a lot too. Now pile on all the stress working for my brother, and you have one mess of a person.

My bf doesn’t quite understand what I’m feeling either. He’s getting frustrated and telling me it’s all in my head, I’m a hypochondriac, and I just want attention. He says he’s never seen anybody with so many problems. That cuts me deep; I need his support now more than ever!

I’ve decided to stir the s**t pot and I wrote my brother a letter. I haven’t sent it yet, but I told him basically I’m not hiding behind secrets and pretend lives anymore. I need to move on, and he needs to know where I stand. I’ve left the door open to him to reconcile if he wants. He’s family whether I like it or not. And I want peace. I’ve also told him not to come to my workplace. I can’t handle it. It’s too hard to try and be happy and deal with customers when I want to throw up and spaz out.

I also got my bf to read the letter I wrote to my brother, so he understands a bit more of my past, and why my head is so messed up. Some days I just want to hide in a hole and never come out. Too bad real life gets in the way of that. Anyways, that’s my vent for the day. Thanks for listening.

~Corinna

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