AfraidinSydney,

 

It is often hard to get things off our mind until they are resolved. You are making a good decision by getting the lump in your abdomen checked out. Once you find out the results that will be one less mystery to worry about. In the meantime, work through the online program, and post here as much as you need to. We are here for you and support you all the way.

 

 

Hello afraidinSydney:  Sorry to hear of your anxiety. I'm glad to hear you will be seeing a doc. about the lump.  This is common sense thing to do, bravo for you.  Do you know there are lot of people who would ignore it because they are afraid of doctors?!  So you are doing well here.  It is anxiety provoking when there is something which appears wrong with our bodies because we feel we have no control over it.  There's this thing growing inside us (perceived sometimes) and we can't stop it.  Very wise to go see someone who knows, the doctor.

Have you tried relaxation techniques to help you relax a little?  How about visualizations?  You could visualize going to the doctor's office and hearing him tell you that all is well, it's nothing to be concerned about".  Sometimes a hot bath, as hot as you can stand it, relaxes the muscles.  Another thing which I do when I see myself going down that path of dread, is count my blessings, when I wake up (at least three things) and when I go to bed.  It doesn't sound like much to do but it helps direct me to positive thinking rather than negative all the time.  Such as the above problem - try and change the negative thought of the "lump" being bad to a thought of "thank goodness we have doctors who can help us and fix it" or  "can't wait to see the doctor and find out all is well". that sort of thing. I'll be thinking of you.  Keep posting, we care

Happy black friday everyone. :) I hope some of you got some really good shopping deals today.

 

Some times when I panic, I come to this site, read others stories and some times it helps me feel better as it is the only place I know where others feel like me. That is often comforting. Some times I read through the posts and I get so angry that I, we, have to feel like this. I suppose it is better to have panic attacks than have a terminal disease or something. I still get so angry. Two nights ago I started thinking about all the times this year that were spent wasting my time panicking when I could have been enjoying my life. It seemed like a great part of the year I had panic. Last year too. It was sad to see on paper all the times I rushed to the doctors to have all kinds of tests etc cause of various physical symptoms that scare me and send me to the doctor. One ongoing issue is this strange upper abdominal pain that I have had almost daily for about 8 years. I have seen various doctors and had various tests including a CT scan exactly a year ago and no one can find anything wrong at all. Being a bit of a hyperchondriac, I swear that it is something that they all have missed. Now I have a lump in my lower right abdomen and I am really, really  spooked. Thus I will be seeing my doctor again in a few weeks to talk about it, but these things scare the hell out of me and sends me into full panic mode. In my mind I imagine cancers, then I start imagining my death and funeral and how sad it will be that I wont see my little nice grow up or other family events. Im so sick of this. Thanksgiving with my family was nice, but my thoughts were elsewhere dreaded. I guess I just wanted to say that out loud. I told my mother, sisters and family my newest concern and my mother seemed scared about my lump, thus it scared me even more. My sisters told me the worrying is all in my head and my partner just told me to try not to worry about it and just make an appointment to see a doctor. I am telling you all because I guess I wanted to tell someone who understands panic. So this time I am having panic in response to something (the lump) that I feel in my body. I don't know what I want from any of you. I don't think there is much anyone can tell me to make me feel better. I just feel trapped and scared to death and sad. I am taking my meds (lexapro), but I am still panicking. I'm just so sad and scared. I wish I could enjoy my life a bit more. My mind cannot focus on anything else and I am trying. Its like this loop. All day I am thinking about the same thing, over and over and over and over. Im going nuts.

 

I hope you are all having a restful day and having nice leftover turkeys.

 

-Scaredy cat.