Just joined today. dont really feel like typing much. dont have energy to do anything today. experiencing severe depersonalization. I have had agoraphobia for my entire life Im almost positive but have only know the "term" for it for about 5 years. I have been on 112.5mg of effexor and have been taking effexor for about 7 months. also, I have been unemployed since january. cant bring myself to get a job because im afraid to leave my house (my safe zone). Ive been borrowing money to pay bills since my unemployment ran out and I am currently applying for disability.
I have an appointment tomorrow to talk about my meds and how ive been feeling (was doing fine for a while, now back to square one, cant do anything) anyways, Im extremely anxious about going because my doctor is 4 towns away. about a 30 minute drive. luckily I dont have to drive there by myself. my mom will be taking me, but it still makes me anxious.
my boyfriend doesnt understand as hard as he tries. he just doesnt get why I feel these things "all of a sudden". we have been together 3 years. and for the first 1.5 years I was okay. I had been on lexapro and I was perfectly fine. it stopped helping and I stopped taking it. which was great for a while. I dunno. Its all a big haze. pretty much, Im crazy.
