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Needing help to start taking control

7 years ago 0 +0 / -0 3

Thanks Julie and Foxman.

Yesterday my thoughts were all about the limit I had set for myself and it was stressful but I met that goal. Today I am feeling positive but the cravings have not started yet.

I get that moderating will be difficult but I think I need to try that route first. Julie, you said you tried that and even though it didn't work for you, what were some of the things you did to limit yourself?

Foxman I am just not mentally ready for AA. I will read a lot on this website and hopefully get more focused and inspired to make the changes I need to make. I would like to get to a point where I could stop for the 90 days. I think if I can do that I will be back in control.

Any encouragement is welcomed. I don't have a big support group so I will probably check in here a lot. It is not easy for me to open up like this. Thanks for listening.

7 years ago 0 +0 / -0 286

Welcome Cinders,

It is tough to reach out and be as honest as you have been. Good for you! I quit drinking over 18 months ago and I can truly say that it is the best thing I have done for myself in a very long time. I had quit before and then tried to moderate several times. As much as I wanted it to be possible to be a moderate social drinker, I always felt the pull to drink more. I had not suffered any major problems because of my drinking, and because I drank at home alone, not many knew of my problem. But I knew and it caused daily pain for me. Eventually it was actually easier for me to not drink at all than to try to use my willpower to moderate.

They say that it takes at least 90 days of no drinking to rewire your brain after alcohol dependence. I can honestly say that although I feared living without alcohol so much, life is so much lighter now, full of possibilities and I am so much happier.

Keep posting here as you work things through. Everyone's path is different and there are stories of success on this website if you read through different threads. I found lots of supportive and helpful people here when I reached out.

7 years ago 0 +0 / -0 1562

Welcome to AHC. Unfortunately some of us (after long arduous experiment) have concluded we cannot moderate liquor. The best is to stay stopped. But I am alcoholic and my mind would trick me back into taking a beer over and over again. Until, I went to AA and started working the 12 steps. Then I was able to understand that the internal un-manageability would lead me back to that first drink and thats what I had to work on. So, today, if I am in a bad spot, I immediately recognize it and start working it. Hope you stick around and ask questions. There are other folks with different experiences. So you get to hear different perspective.

7 years ago 0 +0 / -0 3

Hello. I've admitted to myself that my wine drinking is out of control and I really need to fix this problem. Each day I wake up and tell myself "today is the day I take control again" but somehow 2 glasses turns into 4 or 5 by the end of the day. I make the usual excuses to myself and promise that tomorrow I will do better.

So here I am, hoping to see myself in others who are struggling with the same issues, hoping that by sharing and supporting others, I will find my own strength.

My goal is to get back to being a social drinker only. I want to be able to take it or leave it - go a day or two without drinking anything or have a glass or two and be able to stop there. Is that even possible? I would like to think so.

I would really love to communicate with other middle aged women (and anyone else) who has slipped into this dark place of drinking wine alone at home everyday but still manages all the demands of life so that no one really knows there is a problem.

Thanks for letting me join in.

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Needing help to start taking control