I'm not sure if its guilt driven or not, but I am feeling like I want to share more quality time with my two children and to be more attentive to their thoughts and concerns. Its not that I haven't been close to them before, but when I think of how I was hiding my alcohol addiction from them, the quality of time spent with them could have been improved. I think about how I rushed to get them tucked away into bed at night, so I could have my time to sit back and drink. I think about how my attention and thoughts were divided between them and my addiction. I think about the money I have squandered to feed my addiction when it could have went towards their educational funds or another beneficial purpose. Even though its been only 2 weeks since I quit drinking, I feel this urge to give my son and daughter my undivided attention, to hug them more, and to relax and genuinely enjoy our time together. Maybe all the energy and effort that went into my alcohol addiction is looking for a better home.
