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Ashley -> Health Educator

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9 years ago 0 11214 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Hi Junes,

Sorry to hear you were feeling down the other day. How are you feeling today?


Feeling a bit down while cutting back or abstaining can be a normal part of withdrawal. Feeling down some days can also be normal for anyone. If you continue to feel down though you might want to check out www.depressioncenter.net. The program there is based in cognitive behaviour therapy which is one of the best treatments for depression. If you do the work you should see a difference in your mood within a few weeks. In my opinion anyone could benefit from knowing and practicing basic CBT principles. Managing to keep a healthy mindset is a very important part of a healthy lifestyle.

Hope you are doing well and having a good Friday!
 
 
Ashley, Health Educator
9 years ago 0 56 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0

Hi everyone 

  Wow thank you so much ! really ..thank you . I am feeling better and especially now after reading everyones posts. Some days have been ok , some good and others like yesterday. It is true that I probably make much more of things then others do, and when others mess up or do dumb things when drunk it really doesn't even phase me...maybe cause i am a drunk and am fully aware due to experience of what alcohol does .but likeyou said I will keep moving forward ...well I will be going forward regardless but this time AF and hoping i am learning . Thank you so much this really made my day ...i appreciate everyone ones support here and I am wishing you a great day to day and always . 

9 years ago 0 51 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Hi Junes hang in there I remember feeling that the honeymoon was over after my first few weeks AF, and being so disappointed and fed up at myself over past things that happened.
Would you think of trying some mindfulness meditation, I personally find it helps me focus on now, the present moment while I let those negative feelings/thoughts pass over me like clouds in the sky, or traffic in the street.
keep in touch like Dave sending support and positive vibes your way

9 years ago 0 11 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Hi Junes,
We all have days when we are just not right…whether it is hormones or neurotransmitters or something has triggered us, we just don't feel…right. It is on these days that we often try to assign a reason for that feeling…this is when we traipse over that regret bridge that Dave848 was talking about. 
I guess there are 2 ways to deal with this: either go across that bridge and have a good wallow (sometimes necessary); or do the complete opposite and add something positive to your life, even if it is something small. One allows you to re-visit the past and put it in perspective, the other builds up your future.
There is no right or wrong way.
I think you are doing a great job!
June
9 years ago 0 347 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Junes,
I hope you are feeling a bit more positive today.  I could hear you disappoint in your last post but you should your strength by not taking a drink.  I know it is easier said than done, but what is done is done.  There is nothing you can do at this point to change it.  What you can do is take ownership of it and maybe find a way to turn it into a positive.  
I am sorry that you are tackling this tough battle of being AF with the weight of the past pressing on you but it sounds as you are pushing through.  Keep it up, you have much support!

Lynn
9 years ago 0 345 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
 

Hi Junes,

Who among us has ever said, “Boy, I’m so glad I did everything just right because my life is truly perfect.” Likely, the more oft used refrain is “woulda, shoulda, coulda.” But, we didn’t. Whatever we did in the past seemed like a good idea at the time otherwise we wouldn’t have done it. That includes abusing ourselves with whatever, whether driven by past hurts, peer pressure, low self esteem, or the love of the high, we did it, embrace it, its part of who we are.

So now as we play that annoying loop in our heads (woulda, shouda, couda), rather than lamenting, why not develop proactive measures to create the type of now that you want to remember as “I am so very happy I did that!”

I believe that is exactly what you’re doing now by eliminating the thing that was causing you to loathe yourself. There are tools to help you with the now and with the past. But, you need to use them to be effective. One of the things you may want to give some consideration is hypnotism. In the short term you could see a professional to give you that boost and in the long term you can practice self hypnosis which is really nothing more than deep relaxation techniques. It teaches you skills to rid yourself of negative thinking patterns and turn them into positives. Check it out on the net…free.

So, for your “now,” why not turn that woulda, shoulda, coulda into want, can, will!

TS

9 years ago 0 1009 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Hi Junes,

You're not are in our frustration and anxiety. Just know there are those on here that are thinking of you and sending you positive vibes (I know I am1). Hindsight can be 20/20 but we don't always want to be staring at where we've been or what we've done. One thing I can say Junes is since I have stopped drinking and observed the binge drinking behaviour of others and seen them at their worst I've realized that we usually make way more out of it than everyone else. We're merciless on ourselves but quick to forgive others. We think it was a catastrophe when the reality is no one usually cares. Sure, they might remember you were hammered but I doubt you were the only one? Trust me, most people look fairly stupid when they've been drinking so you don't have the market cornered on bad judgement when impaired. Regret is often a bridge to the past we like to cross back over a little too often. I say blow the damn things up! Once you do you might be able to see the problem from a distance but you don't have much choice but to move forward. Keep walking forward Junes because, from what I can see, you're doing great. It's been over a month now correct? It takes time and it is definitely going to get a lot better. I've gone through different phases over the last number of months since I quit and I continue to go through them. Sometimes they were very stressful and I felt depressed for no particular reason (probably that extended winter we just had to endure!) The difference is life is much more relaxed and enjoyable now. You'll find the same. Maybe you can't do the most financially for your mom at the moment but you can be there for her. She appreciate that as much.

All the best Junes,

Dave
9 years ago 0 56 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0

Hi Everyone 


   i have to just post my feelings today . I am having a hard day...I dont really want to drink its more thinking about the past ( which i know is the past) but just how i threw everything away for the party and how i really dont have much now...my mother is struggling and i cannot even help her( financially etc) I dont know if I am feeling sorry for myself or jsut really sad and mad at myself or both but getting overwhelmed with emotion right now ( what i have ran from for 20 plus years through alcohol) . i am not going to drink but man am I having a hard time with these emotions I just want to cry all day today. 


anyhow i dont want to be a downer or a negative nancy jsut need some words any words of advice or tips or anything really 

Hope everyone is doing well 


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