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9 years ago 0 +0 / -0 1009

Awesome job of 14 (now 15!) days Barb. Great outlook and attitude. You exactly right.....you CAN do this! Great work and inspired post.

All the best,

Dave

9 years ago 0 +0 / -0 347

Good job TS and Barb! Keep up the hard work.

Junes, awesome poem on the other post. I am sure I will refer back to it often.

Last week I went 5 days AF, the longest I have gone in over 13 years. One of the days was the 4th of July!! I allowed myself to have drinks over the weekend and then on Monday had 2 beers and was heading for my 3rd and actually caught myself thinking, "I really don't want want beer." I don't know if I have EVER thought that before and if I did I certainly didn't listen to it! Today I finished my work early and was bored and of course my thoughts went to drinking. I fought them off and and glad I did. Look forward to tomorrow morning and not feeling bad!

Dave, I have to say thank you (once again) for your suggestion of Paul Mckinna. Having the confidence of getting a good nights sleep has often helped me get through the thoughts of not drinking.

Hope everyone has a great night!

Lynn

9 years ago 0 +0 / -0 345

Whoa! Way to go Barb not touching that open bottle and on day 14! Excellent Barb, it would have been so easy to justify having "just one". Not convinced I could handle that yet, I'm on day 10, but I did pass three liquor stores today, yes, you read right, passed. I am totally staying away from anyone that drinks which means avoiding everyone that my husband I hung out with when he was alive.

I'm sure they can drink just fine without me.

9 years ago 0 +0 / -0 12

Good to come back and read everyone's posts.. thank you!

Today is day 14 for me, and I must say I feel proud, and great! I have dealt with an open bottle of wine on the kitchen island while I was cooking dinner...if I can say no to that ( which I did ) I think I can do this.

Barb

9 years ago 0 +0 / -0 1009

Hi Yakob,

I agree with you 100% of your points and relieved you are considering the problem from various points of view rather than simply saying "I am......" this without challenging the idea. The fact we have arrived at this point simply means we've gotten a little lost moving forward on our personal journey. Some times we can correct that path it more easily and get right back on track and other times it takes considerably more effort to get there, like chopping through a dense bush. So much of what you've said reminds me of myself so I can really relate. One thing I've realized during this on-going journey is that WAY too much emphasis is placed on drinking to have a good time, which really makes you winder why everyone finds it so necessary to include drinking as part of the social fabric. I know why they enjoy it, but is it really necessary? Yakob, I've spent a lot of time thinking about the "why" of what was driving my drinking over the last number of months and I wrote down some of the things that I discovered to about myself in my blog under an entry called "Power vs Powerlessness". You may be able to relate to it so perhaps it will give you a slightly different perspective. Also, sometimes we don't do the best job at standing up for ourselves and so developing our assertiveness skills goes a long way in relieving the background stress that diminishes our self-worth and self-respect. Something to consider.

I have a similar work function each year as your golf tournament and it's a huge blow-out. The last event was the first time I can remember not joining in the fun and it takes a lot of mental effort and a solid plan for dealing with everyone. Saying "I'm taking a break" or "I'm not drinking tonight, I have WAY too much family stuff going on tomorrow..." or whatever really helps. It's not comfortable at first and we experience anxiety for sure but it WILL get easier the more you practice. Going to the gym for the first time in quite a while is usually a painful and uncomfortable experience too but after we train for a while we actually embrace the new challenges and want to push ourselves. This is no different. It will get a lot easier as you develop your own strength and you are going to learn so many new things about yourself and finally get rid a lot of the junk that has been dragging you down for way too long.

You have a lot going for Yakob and I'm really impressed by how you're dealing with this challenging situation. Make tomorrow a success!

All the best,

Dave

9 years ago 0 +0 / -0 13

You know Dave, I've been thinking a lot about your reply to my initial post and I'd have to say I agree with you in the sense I should be careful what I choose to believe when I say I have a disease. I don't believe I'm an alcoholic. I know I have a problem drinking at times by drinking to excess. I have looked hard at long at myself in the mirror and I have identified the situations in my life that cause me to drink to the point where I run into trouble. You're right that it's the issues buried deep inside me ( probably all of us) that lead me to drink and that's it's not the drink itself I struggle with. I'm in the process of coming to terms with myself as to what causes me to reach for a drink. It's the social situations where I feel that booze makes me become more of an extrovert than an introvert. I just need to be more comfortable being me, taking the good with the bad. I'm a good person who really does not need to drink to be happy. I have not had a drink or one sip for that matter since June 30th. I have a big golf tournament coming up on Thursday and every year prior I have gotten drunk ( along with literally 100 other people) but this year will be different. I want to have a clear mind and not go home with the title of drunkest guy at the tournament. There is simply no need for it. I am going to bring some non alcoholic beer should I really feel the need I'd like to taste a beer, but this will be the biggest test I've faced so far in my decision to quit/reduce my drinking. I know I'll be strong and I know I can do it because I want to do it and I have the support of my friends and family. I appreciate your candid response Dave. Good luck everybody! Stay strong! Stay the course!

9 years ago 0 +0 / -0 345

Fantastic Yakob!!! Me too! I'm feeling soooo much better already. Keep up the great work...you've proven to yourself that you CAN do it.

9 years ago 0 +0 / -0 13

Through the weekend drink free. :)

9 years ago 0 +0 / -0 13

THANKS TS.

9 years ago 0 +0 / -0 13

Not a sip of booze since last Friday. I'm not a daily drinker so I'm really not too surprised that I haven't had any withdrawal issues or severe cravings (yet) but last night was the first time in almost a week that I was in a situation and around people (family) that I identified as a personal trigger situation. My parents were very supportive of me and the fact I had my two boys with me made it even simpler to avoid the drink. I will say a beer would have tasted nice but in all seriousness, a cold coca cola over ice tasted just as good if not better! It was a small hurdle to get over and I'm happy to say I leapt over it! The journey of a thousand miles begins with one step. Take each day as it comes.

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