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12 years ago 0 +0 / -0 325

Thank you all so much for your support. I was almost not going to post how bad I was last night but glad I did because all of you make me want to get back to where I was heading last week. Staying sober for days and enjoying the feeling of being in control. This is such a fantastic place to come and share your true self. Turquoise, don't be hard on yourself for eating a bit too much..you did not drink, so focus on that. Spiritwolf, welcome and this is a wonderful place where you will never be judged, just supported. MOGA is Moderation Gang which Turquoise so aptly named us...Camiol, I understand your inner battle. I am there also. Foxman, thanks for your input also. I understand you do not agree with the moderation method and that's OK. Blackpearl, my determination is kicking in today and I am going to abstain this week so thanks for your comments. Each one of you is a big help in keeping or getting back on track. Vincenza, I will start right now looking for distractions and recheck the toolbox section. Thank you one and all again for making me feel like I am worthwhile and can do this for myself...Marylizy

12 years ago 0 +0 / -0 14

Since I am very new to this could someone please explain what Moga is?

I think now is a good time to share a little. I have been trying for a long time now to stop or re frame from drinking. I simply believe I can have one. But more often than not it turns to a lot more. I have been trying to remember when I started drinking this bad. I have no real clue. I just want to believe that I am better than this. I have tried the regular route... And was not really welcomed into the clicks that were formed before I arrived. I found this site last week and finally decided that I need support from someone other than myself .. so here I am scared out of my mind.... needing support for this endeavor.

12 years ago 0 +0 / -0 14

Don't be so hard on yourself. Food is fun. One day of over indulgence is not bad. Many days is different. Think of it like a treat. You don't get one every day. Hope it helps.

12 years ago 0 +0 / -0 409

P.S. I ate WAY too much when I went out to dinner tonight. Although I didn't drink, I am stuffed to the point of being very uncomfortable, and pissed off at myself for my lack of control over my diet. I have been at a healthy weight for over a year, and I don't do this regularly -- but I do it occasionally. Tomorrow I plan to eat very healthy, and get back to where I was before this evening. Does it mean I'm a hopeless food addict, with no hope of ever controlling my food intake? Or is the rare "lapse"okay, as long as it's infrequent and doesn't impact my health? Any thoughts on this?

12 years ago 0 +0 / -0 14

Thanks. I might just like it here.

12 years ago 0 +0 / -0 1562

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I think it is a matter of determination. I was once a heavy drinker but when I decided to cut it down and with my faith, I cut it down. I believe that even one be a heavy drinker for a long time, if s/he wants to cut it down, with the determination, s/he could.

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Yes he/she could control but it depends on how much damage they have done to their body. Again, you may think you are in control, but slowly the situation may deteriorate. They call it cunning, baffling and powerful.

12 years ago 0 +0 / -0 409

And Spiritwolf, welcome.... As you have probably quickly found out, this is a site with no judgment, only support. Whatever your story is, someone on this site will undoubtedly be able to relate to you. Read through the forums until you find a thread that "speaks to you" and then join in. We are all in the process of overcoming our dependence on alcohol, one way or another. No need to be nervous -- we are all very, very human here.

12 years ago 0 +0 / -0 409

I am really emotional right now, for a couple of reasons. First - when I suggested this challenge, my first inner reaction was the same as all those years when I would start a new diet. "I'm starting on Friday, so I might as well go all out now before it starts." Then, I thought, "I know better than that, and besides, I'll be on this road trip, so it will be easy for me." And then, I thought.... "I wonder if any of the Mogas will backfire because of this, and end up drinking too much and feeling guilty about it." But I brushed those misgivings aside. Perhaps it was a big mistake to suggest this challenge.

No. It has to be a learning experience for all of us, especially me. My mistake was assuming that just because I'm at a place where I feel like I'm ready to do this, everyone else can be ready for it right now. I do agree with foxman that there are some people who are more easily and hopelessly addicted than others. I don't think that all people who are at the point of problem drinking are incapable of returning to moderation, but I believe it IS true for people who truly have the "allergy" or brain pattern, or OCD genetics -- whatever it is.

The solution is getting there. We each need to find out for ourselves -- to the depths of our own souls -- if we are one of those people. We each need to know if we have any chance of controlling that compulsion, before we will be willing to give up alcohol forever. If we aren't sure, then we will probably continue to drink in the hopes that we aren't. The beauty of this forum is the ability to talk through our attempts as many times as we need to, without judgment or lectures, until we know the answer for ourselves.

So, fellow Mogas, no judgments, no failures, no mistakes. This is a learning experience, and we are each at a point tonight of greater wisdom than we were yesterday. Mostly I'm humbled by everyone's honesty and willingness to come back and post to this thread. What a strong group...

12 years ago 0 +0 / -0 14

Hi this is my very first day here. I am very nervous.

12 years ago 0 +0 / -0 616

Hi Vincenza, last night when I decided to drink that wine it was because I made the conscious decision to drink too much. I WANTED to get a good buzz going. When I felt I had enough, I stopped. I still had some semblance of control in the fact that I was well aware that if I had anymore wine I would get really drunk and I knew it was time to stop. I woke up today with no hangover and full memory of last night, my reason for being so ticked at myself was because we Mogas decided to try a full week of no alcohol and I chose not to do it. It wasn't because I couldn't do it, I know I could have, I chose to drink and i feel as though I let my friends down, which in turn makes me feel bad.

My inner battle about whether or not to just allow myself to drink when I want to, or quit altogether is causing me some grief. I enjoy having a drink, most of the time I am able to control myself, but I realize there are times that I drink way too much. I think what I'm trying to figure out is when I do drink too much, is it simply my choice to tie one on that night or am I seriously out of control? I'm torn at this point. I know for a fact that last night was a choice, but I also know there have been times where I am not in control. I guess I'm kind of at a crossroads with all of this. I feel like maybe I have the ability to control how much I drink, but maybe not always. It's a hard thing to deal with.

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