I felt the same way you are feeling now, and thought alcohol was the cure all for everything.
I used it to fall asleep, function during the day,and feel lousy the rest of the time.
It was something I had to have all the time....
Then I thought I might need to seek and get an opinion on my behavior,
Because it was taking over my life.
I figured at this point what could it hurt.
He have me a short test and and went over it with me.
He then made an appointment with a who diagnosed me bi-polar.
Then, with the correct medications, the excessive cravings for alcohol to
something that AA could and I could handle.
I'm saying there may be something more than alcohol, there was in my case,
Good luck to you