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I?m just about to cave.

13 years ago 0 +0 / -0 206

Oh my. Turn my back for 2 minutes and look what happens!

Sorry I haven't been around much -- been on the road a lot. Home for a few days, then off to sunny Florida for a wedding. Nice that things are returning to about as normal as they get...

peteg

13 years ago 0 +0 / -0 290

Pen: I didn't see the apology....but all's good. We addressed that. Now that I know I have a target square on my behind i'll have to stay in line.

ha ha

Aloha: what? WHAT??!!!
10K?

10 LARGE?

10 BIG ONES?

10 SMACKAROONIS?

I'll say thats a milestone...Puts it all in perspective yes? Very good on you!

Aloha & Pen: on Peteg: He's my bro we went through allot over the years, and well pretty much going through again. He defended me fiercely which I appreciate, and would do for him. But with that said we are both probably at the same mixed up in the head place, we all started from in the quit. Learning to recognise this will be the trick.

Last but not least;

eya.....You crack me up! Yes, my reward tools are honed and ready! Took me a sec to figure the acronym but Im getting better!

13 years ago 0 +0 / -0 11226

Hello everyone,

I am happy to see that you guys have worked things out. Quitting is a stressful time and it is completely normal for us to see conflicts on the forums from time to time. Now that the issue is resolved let's focus on what matters staying quit!

How do you handle your craves when dealing with a stressful situation like a conflict?

Ashley, Health Educator

Here to help :)

13 years ago 0 +0 / -0 2534

Hi Dunedad,

I am so pleased that you came through your alarm the other night unscathed and that you are still smoke-free. From a support point of view it seemed to me that you were desperate. I deduced that from the title of your thread “I’m just about to cave” and the fact that no-one had responded to you in nearly 3 hours. To me, it may already have been too late.

Well, desperate times sometimes need drastic actions. Hence my response, which was calculated and deliberately hard in an effort to get you to see the folly of lighting up. Nothing changes.I knew the risk and was prepared to take it to try to help you.

Your reaction wasn’t surprising, it could have gone either way but it wasn't surprising and I apologised for my misjudgement. I do hope you saw my apology post before it was deleted for some strange reason.

Anyway, the important thing is that you didn’t cave and you are still not smoking and that is a condition to be applauded and cherished.

I’m with eya, you can do this, this time, if you really want to. I for one will be right there for you as I was the other night.

Good Luck,

Penitent

Quit Meter

$59,015.00

Amount Saved
Quit Meter

Days: 1168 Hours: 23

Minutes: 4 Seconds: 32

Life Gained
Quit Meter

5365

Smoke Free Days
Quit Meter

118,030

Cigarettes Not Smoked

13 years ago 0 +0 / -0 823

Hmmmm -not sure what's been censored so it's hard to get all aspects of this controversy - but need to say Thank you! to the long time quitters here. They've been invaluable to my 2 month Quit. These diaries, posts, HOF stories & stats are far from soap boxy to me; instead they're a testament to those who've made their Quits work! Some are raw, some poignant, funny, kind, hard nosed, and sweet. But all are openly willing to share! Bless them!

After a failed Quit attempt of 3 yrs, I closet smoked for another 3 yrs and fell into a cesspool or remorse I never want to relive! I promised my Dad (recently lost to lung cancer) that I would Quit now, once and for all! The kick in the butt (pun intended) I needed to come to terms with my Junkie came from these veterans on this site! Thanks to them all (with uncensored Pen kicking butt all the way) I now understand NOPE! This gives me hope that I will make it - even 3 yrs from now, and resist that random crave! I hope you make it too Peteg, DuneDude & Marbles - you're the new March mellows & you already have some stats to show for it!

13 years ago 0 +0 / -0 3207

I think we all have our own approaches and beliefs about how to successfully quit, but most of those who have years under their belt realize that it's an all or nothing proposition. Addicts, no matter what their drug of choice is, can't have one here and there and expect to remain sober or free from their addiction for very long. I think that was Pen's point, and mine.

I've supported many people who have struggled to remain smoke free and have relapsed many times, as has Pen, but I have to tell you, sometimes I feel like I have to tell it like I see it when someone repeatedly gives up and then uses the boards to get validation for their decision to smoke. In my opinion that is what Pen was doing - not giving Dunedad an easy out (not that DD is one who has repeatedly given up. I don't know that about him one way or the other, since this is my first encounter with him).

Hope you and and everyone else is remaining smoke free tonight

-aloha

13 years ago 0 +0 / -0 823

Yay! You're honing that tool up quickly Dunedude; 'GURAQT' notwithstanding

You can leave the rest of 'em in the shed to rust if U must; you're on your way! Good thinking ahead on the wife/reward situation

Am thinkin' Win-Win here; WooHoo2U2!

I know you addressed Pen latest, but just wanted you to know that his wisdom & method here does Rock the Quit! - same thing happened to me on my 1st few days here -I 'fessed up to having a few puffs due to a tough time with my Cold Turkey Quit - and got little 1/4 from most long timers here - but Pen's post was cut & dry! NOPE or FAIL!!! - NO EXCUSES! I was so ticked & bewildered, I nearly Quit the site!! But I came back a few days later - Reset my meter to Day 1; wrote a post about how much "I hated the SSC Yesterday" and started over with a clean QUIT! I have NOT looked back since with NOPE & it gets easier everyday! And the long time Quitters here (Pen 2 :) WOW! Inspiration up the Yin Yang from that day on! You are going to make it DuneDude! I just NOPE it!

13 years ago 0 +0 / -0 3207

Okay, so is everybody ready to kiss and make up now?....oh that's right, you're dudes. Well, at least the panties are getting untwisted and Pen can lay off a bit on the tough guy tell em like it is routine now that you've passed that hurdle.

Dunedude -->

<---Pen

Sounds like your reward would be waaaaay more fun, DD. Hmmmm...now that I've saved 10 grand maybe I should go get a massage (notice how I slipped that milestone in?...hahahaha..been waiting for that!).

Let's just keep focusing on not smoking, shall we? (omg..the mods should love me for that!)

-aloha

13 years ago 0 +0 / -0 290

Dam it! I remember it from my last quit too....Should have seen it coming!

Hold the phone....Renovation supplies for my reward? Thats already budgeted. Besides that, Im thnking a massage or something. Maybe reward my wife with something...And well...In turn ....Well you get the idea of the reward flow.

Penitent, I know your going for the tough love approach and giving me a good slap to snap out of it. Maybe I just wasn't ready for it. I've been noticing your bumps and comments on other threads and am taking those as they should be; constructively.

I beleive the beginning of this post I was setting up for a fail, Penitent has been around long enough to see right through that. Harsh...Yes. Was it the right dose of good cop bad cop, absolutley!

13 years ago 0 +0 / -0 3207

Glad you didn't cave and that you're focusing on the good side of this, Dunedad.

I remember being very sensitive to others' remarks and actions for about the first six months of my quit and I'd say those were some of the hardest triggers to deal with. You think that may be kind of what's been happening for you in these early days?

Wow, I just thought of something. What renovation supplies can you buy with $180? I bet it's almost enough to paint the whole interior of your new house. Wouldn't that be a great reward?!

Keep on NOPEing it

-aloha

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I?m just about to cave.